Dario Argento is one of my numero uno directors and all of the bad buzz on "The Card Dealer" couldn’t have sliced and diced my enthusiasm when it came to seeing the movie. I mean, "The Stendthal Syndrome" and "Sleepless" had negative word of mouth before their respective releases and yet I wound up enjoying them both to various degrees. When I heard "The Card Dealer" was in town, I actually cut an AFM (American Film Market) meeting short to catch it, so yes, I came into this card game with high stakes and a shit-eating grin on my face. Did I come out a winner?

There are two ways one can perceive “The Card Dealer”: as a “regular” film or as an “Argento" film. On its own merits, this pretty “standard” serial killer versus the law cat and mouse jamboree was entertaining enough throughout with a swift pace, predictable -- yet at times still back-hand slapping -- plot turns, some memorable horror-inclined set pieces, a couple of “pop goes the weasel to kick your ass” surprises (the water spit gag owned), some offbeat “Argento was on weed” comedy (yes, coroners DO sing opera!) and fairly visceral online “poker” matches that had me by the oranges. A note on the card playing, if I may: was I the only one feeling the pain for these dames as the off-screen torture was going down? My imagination was definitely running wild during those scenes. Props to Argento for casting some rock solid screamers who knew how to pop a lung and who therefore upped the impact of the goreless scenarios. DAMN!

From a visual standpoint, although not up to Argento’s usual standards, I did groove on the dread-filled photography, some of the slick shot compositions and the creative handling of specific scenes (the Remo chasing hot babe in the maze like town and the Anna versus the killer in her pad were my highlights). Lastly, the flick definitely benefited from having two strong lead actors carrying the circus admirably. Both Stefania Rocca (Anna) and Liam Cunningham (John) not only bravely overcame bad dialogue to shine, but also managed to make their flimsily written “lovey-mushy” relationship engaging with bang-on acting and some well oiled chemistry. I genuinely enjoyed following these two crazy kids around. Their courtship and the personal demons they carried with them were my anchor to the story.

Now as a Dario Argento picture, this baby was what I like to call “sedated” Argento. The film’s visual style was nothing like the flamboyant and daring Argento of old. It lacked pizzazz, onions and anchovies. Then there was the total absence of gore. Was Dario trying to change his image here? Was he trying to go mainstream on us or something? What’s going on here? Mommy! I lost my dolly! Apart from some icky after-the-fact cadavers, this flick was dryer than a 90-year old ex call-girl cleaning my dishes when the plumbing’s out. WE NEEDED SOME RED WET HERE! To top that off, the very badly veiled whodunit at play (I guessed the killer’s identity way early on), the piss poor motive behind the madness, the LAUGHABLE acting from many of the side players and the tacked-on last frame of the film (what was that all about?) also weakened the whole of the affair. Prepare yourself for some unintentional laughter to erupt.

Asia Argento was initially attached to star in the film as Anna, but she dropped out to direct her own picture ("The Heart is Deceitful Above All Things"). In consequence, the financing fell through, Dario got pissed at his daughter and had to recast and refinance the film.

Last I heard, Anchor Bay acquired this film in order to distribute it domestically.