Critters 2 (1988)
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| Directed by: |
Mick Garris
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| Starring: |
Scott Grimes/Brad
Brown |
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Don Keith
Opper/Charlie |
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Terrence
Mann/Ug |
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Barry
Corbin/Harv |
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| RATING
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PLOT-CRUNCH:
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It’s Easter. Teen Brad (Grimes) comes back to his home
town to visit his grand-mother (I guess the rest of the family don’t
really give a crap about grandma). His return coincides with the hatching
of the Critter eggs that were left behind. Faster than you can say
"Die Hard", Brad has to fight those pesky Crits again but this
time he has Charlie, The Bounty Hunters and the whole town behind him…NOT
a fair fight.
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THE
LOWDOWN: |
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In the original I was rooting for the family to win, in this one I was definitely
rooting for the Critters. This movie has all the symptoms of
"sequel" syndrome. On the down side: the characters are all one
dimensional, there’s more comedy, no suspense whatsoever and a forced
romance. On the plus side: the effects are way better and we get to see
more of the Critters in action. Lets cut this puppy open.
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| ACTING: |
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Whatever…They take the "Charlie is a
bumbling fool" bit to a higher level and that's too bad cause Opper
is just not funny…His attempt at drama is also lousy but to tell you the
truth I think that it’s more the script’s fault than his. The only
"good" performance is given by Barry Corbin (Harv), he makes the
part of Harv his (played by Emmet Walsh in the first) and we love to look
at him. Grimes (Brad) was way cuter when he was a kid and doesn’t have
the charisma to carry this film (but he does a great job in Night Life…go
figure) His tender moments with Garris (Cynthia) are laughable at best.
His character seems more in lust with Charlie (Opper) than with the broad.
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| GORE: |
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Not much, I’ve seen Disney movies that were
more violent.
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| T
& A: |
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The highlight of this movie is a scene where one of the Bounty Hunters
morphs into a Playboy Playmate (no joke). We get to see a big pair of fake
breasts. I for one don’t like fake breasts (ever touch one?…feels like
cement) I don’t think bigger is better. But if you love your big
boobies, you’re in for a treat…enjoy
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| DIRECTING: |
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Garris tries to pull a "Gremlins"…scare
us and make us laugh…he fails on both counts. This movie is very
colorful (it is after all Easter) and I for one have a problem with that.
I like my movies darker, specially when they involve flesh eating space
gerbils.
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| SOUNDTRACK: |
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Nothing to write home about. No rock songs and
the score will be erased from your memory by the time the credits end (The
original had a great soundtrack).
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| BOTTOM LINE: |
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Except for a scene where the Critters take over
a fast food joint "Gremlins" style, this movie doesn’t have
much to offer. None of the chemistry or thrills found in the original are
here. On the flip side: the Critters look great (bigger budget), are darn
cute, and the scenes where they wreck havoc are pleasant, too bad you have
to sit through so much crap to get to them. Watch this one with your
little sister.
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| BULL'S EYE: |
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Look for references to: Ghostbusters, Cujo, Nightmare
On Elm Street and Star Trek in this one.
Am I the only one that thinks
that the guns the Bounty Hunters use are "phallic" symbols.
Cynthia Garris played in four
"Mick Garris" films: The Stand, Psycho 4, Sleepwalkers and The
Shining (TV)…Daughter? Wife? Housekeeper? Something is going on for
sure...
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