"Night of the Demons" is one of my fav HORROR PARTY MIXES and even Part 2 managed to deliver some goodies that were worth the green. After years of avoiding Part 3 like a bad case of chlamydia, gonorrhea, genital warts and herpes...I decided to take a chance, put a rubber on and give it a doggy bang. Did I live to regret it? YES! This Mademoiselle was just a bad lay!

On the upside, the best thing about this sequel is its animated opening credits with flying demons and shite going coo-coo all over the screen. Groovy stuff! The whole movie should’ve been about that jive. Words to the wise: do your thang , watch the opening credits and take a magic carpet ride to hell. The rest of the movie is a whole other cock-fight and I don’t mean the animal. To be fair, I did kind of enjoy the set-up with the entertaining shootout. It was different than what we’d seen in the first two films and I actually didn’t see it coming. But once the teen schmucks got to the big bad house, it wasn’t too long until the jig was proven to be up.

Now, what I always appreciated about the first Night of the Demons was its morbid creativity, its flashy/energetic directing and its  “out there” special effects. Sure, the sequel had some of those potent spices too but I’ll stick with Part 1 in terms of comparison. This “routine” sequel is sleeping on the job and it just won't wake up! You can kick it, slap it, fuck its mouth blue; it just won’t come to life! It be deader than Cobain. The effects are sooooo of the “dime store” variety and if you think a Halloween mask is scary; HAVE FUN BUDDY! And what about the creativity, you may ask? Well, if you find an evil Snake Sock Puppet novel, you’ll blow your load here like Ron Jeremy on Viagra. As for me, I need more than footwear with a mouth to get my horror juices flowing.

Directing-wise, Kaufman is spacing at the wheel and offers one redundant 80 minutes. Dude, there’s more to directing than 3 fucking types of shots! Take a chance! Storyboard your film! At least think about SOME pre-production! Go nuts! This movie looks like it was shot in one hour and even the “requisite” Raimi-like demon POV shot that we also find in the two previous films felt fairly impotent here! And then you have the “coup the grace” which are the unbearable characters and the "tickle your balls with a chainsaw" acting. Holy shite, Batgirl...and I thought the acting in the first two films was amateurish. You haven’t seen anything yet! Now I’m not sure if it was the often-lousy dialogue or the actors’ pre-school delivery but I’ll take a chance and lean towards BOTH. I dare you to find TWO characters you genuinely appreciate in here, I double dare you! I actually managed to find one, Lois (Slone) the bitchy blonde tramp did manage to rock my world with her assets (yes, I know...it figures). That soft drink with tits was my flavor and definitely Arrow approved!

So what’s left, Taco? Does this movie have anything to put out to make it worth a gander? Well, actually its main strength is SEX. I think the folks behind this baby knew they had a flying used diaper on their hands so they filled it with unapologetic smut. I’m talking female flesh peddling galore, sexual intercourse up the blow dryer, Angela sucking off a gun (cool scene actually, solid technique there girl…congrats), some dude getting head, a lesbian kiss and even a snake sock puppet managing to lightly eat a girl out. I know this might sound like "fun times" in a cereal box but WITHOUT the horror all that sex wasn’t worth more than a 5-minute whack and a well-earned power nap.

Kevin Tenney who wrote and directed the way kool original was responsible for this one’s screenplay. He also co-edited it.

This flick was shot in my hometown of Montreal, Canada.

Here’s an odd story: As I was writing this review, I was listening to “Joydrop”; one of my fav Canadian bands. I then went on the net to do some research and found out that Tara Slone (the chick I was drooling over in this review) IS the lead singer of “Joydrop”! TALK ABOUT A COINCIDENCE! You know what that means Tara…do yourself a favor and CALL ME! I’ll take you out for a “Big Mac” and a “Coke”. “Sometimes I want to die” too, hun.

The flick is also known as “Demon House”.

My Captain Morgan theory worked. With him by my side, the flick was FREAKING HILARIOUS on a second watch. It's still a bad movie though.