A long haired badass (Solomon Kane, played by James Purefoy) who’s got a talent as to whooping skulls is forced to go the anti violence way, unless he wants to chill in hell with Old Scratch. But one day, circumstances force him back into the wonderful world of maiming, killing and beheading and for a good cause at that – to seek redemption for his soul. Let the bodies hit the floor!

If I kill you, I am bound for hell. It is a price I shall gladly pay. – Solomon Kane

Michael J.Bassett’s SOLOMON KANE was inspired by pulp author R.E. Howard’s stories of the same name. Yup the latter came up with CONAN and RED SONJA as well. Now I’ve never read CONAN or SOLOMON KANE but I have seen the CONAN movies of course. Part 1 owns me, you and planet Uranus! So after the SOLOMON KANE screening I was lucky enough to catch, I was told by some Kane purists that the film’s story didn’t have much to do with the written work they were based on…grumble, grumble. Though I’d share that with ya! Me? I didn’t give an ounce of a half of a sprinkle of a shit being that I had no knowledge or attachment to the source material. So did Mr. Kane and I get along? Famously!

SOLOMON KANE maybe didn’t have much to do with where it came from but man did it echo the CONAN THE BARBARIAN movie in terms of narrative structure, villain and plot turns. Hey, all good with me! If you’re going to be similar to something, might as well be to one of the best. To be honest, when the SOLOMON KANE prologue kicked in, I thought I was in trouble. James Purefoy as the Kane Man was hammy to say the least and I thought: “An hour and a half of this level of overacting will drive me bonkers”. Thankfully, the “big acting” was kept only for that bit and once the present story unraveled, Purefoy left the ham at home and went on to deliver an intense, likeable and somber show. Yes he looked like Van Helsing and somewhat even talked like him, but Purefoy conveyed a deep rooted edge and an endearing darkness that Jackman didn’t have in his film. Speaking of Van Helsing. I can see why The Kane gets compared to it all over the web. Solomon’s get-up was similar, both films were set in medieval times and Solomon like Helsing also battled the armies of darkness. In my shitty opinion though the film's mean streak and bleaker than bleak tone was enough for it to stand tall and proud on its own.

Another plus here were the tight production designs and lavish locations on hand. The costumes and sets were ASTOUNDING while the oppressive woods, the awe inspiring snowy mountains tagged with the polished cinematography all chipped in to have me say “I wanna vacation there, sword in tow!” Then we had the countless amounts of beasties hitting the spot. Lots of varied baddies here (loved them cannibals) all well designed and mostly well executed. Moreover, the drama here was hard hitting to say the least. I really got into the characters, their relationships and the visceral turns they were put through. Needless to say that the bang on cast had something to do with me getting owned by this one's human/emotional content. Hard to go wrong with Pete Postlethwaite (who wisely downplayed it), Alice Krige, Max Von Sydow, the lovely and oh so f*ckable Rachel Hurd-Wood and Jason Flemyng. They all brought further class and legitimacy to the movie.

And when you add to all that loving a slew of exciting action sequences (crazy chases and razor choreographed sword fights), a winning sense of humor, a keen eye behind the lens (Michael J.Bassett knows a thing or two about groovy hero shots), a couple of left field NASTY moments that uppercut my sorry ass and a moving score - you get a fun and quality filled ride all round! Any peeves with this tough guy? A few. Nothing worth murdering your ex over though. The flick sported some dodgy CGI now and again with the “end bad guy” being the worse of the lot. I actually thought the latter was not only mishandled execution wise but also in terms of him being a big pussy (when taking into account “who” he is). Personally I wouldn't even had showed him at all. Would've kept it for the the sequel. "Him" being in the film was akin to me dropping my load too early when in a bang and run situation. But hey that’s just me. Finally the chain of events was somewhat predictable. No fantasy subgenre stone was left unturned here and I saw most of the film coming.

Overall though, I really dug my time with Mr. Kane. He was the kind dude I’d love to have by my side in a bar fight. I hope to see him going into decapitation overload once more with the “should happen” SOLOMON KANE PART 2!

Kane aint playing here. He graced me with mucho severed limbs, daggers in the neck, sword piercing, healthy blood sprays and all kinds of beheadings. Good man!

No bare titties in Solomon Kane's world... poor dude...!

SOLOMON KANE was a top notch horror, fantasy with a high body count! It was part Hollywood-ish blockbuster and part unapologetically mean motherf*cker. It had stellar acting all round (if life is fair, this flick should make James Purefoy a star), money on the screen on every level, violence galore, gorgeous directing choices, potent drama and enough f*ck yeah fanboy pleasing moments to fill up 60 coffins. Sure the CGI was on and off and the whole fairly predictable if ya know your sword/sorcery subgenre but when all was gutted and sliced up I had a blast! If well distributed this one should break the bank at the Box Office. Van Helsing? Who’s Van Helsing? GET ME THE KANE!

The flick cost 30 million clams to make.

I first saw James Purefoy in Paul Anderson’s RESIDENT EVIL.

R.E. Howard’s was born on January 22 1906 in Peaster, Texas, USA. He committed suicide on June 11 1936 after hearing of his mother’s death. He shot himself in the head.