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The Arrow
Species 2 (1998)
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| Directed by: |
Peter Medak
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| Starring: |
Michael
Madsen/Preston |
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Natasha Henstridge/Eve
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Marg Helgenberger/Laura
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Justin
Lazard/Patrick |
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| RATING
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PLOT-CRUNCH:
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Astronaut
Patrick (Lazard) successfully achieves the first Mars landing. The bad
news is that he returns to earth with an alien presence inside of him.
Once on earth he feels the need to nail every broad with a pulse and in
the process, creates a bunch of “alien” babies. It's up to Michael
Madsen to track him down and kill the bastard. Oh and Natasha Henstridge
shows up to reveal her breasts…again!
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THE
LOWDOWN: |
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Where
the first "Species" was a B-movie movie that didn’t want to admit it to
itself, this sequel plays out in the opposite direction. It knows that it's
smut and it loves it. This sequel is mainly about tits, gore and Natasha
Henstridge running in slow motion, tits bobbling up and down a la “Bionic
Woman” (nothing wrong with that). The acting is awful (George
Dzundza is the biggest stinker here…shame on you). The dialogue is
atrocious (my fav: her estrogen level is way up as if she was in heat…urgh) and the plot is filled with holes (one example: Eve isn’t
supposed to have men around but every dude in the house enters her
“jail”. Even worse than that is once they actually do capture the male
alien, they also bring him to her pad!! What???). The movie also has a
tendency not to explain itself too clearly, leaving the audience to assume
things (Where did
that hand out of the wall come from? How did Dennis get in on the hunt?
Isn’t he an astronaut?).
I
watched this film with a friend of mine (who happens to be black) and he
brought up these interesting points about the movie, which I have to share: Isn’t it funny how Eve (Henstridge)
rejects only the brother from all of the men? Or how the brother’s blood winds up being the only poison
that kills the alien? Or how he talks big about guns but winds up arming
himself with a machete because he wants to go African on their ass (bad
line)? Now I’m not sure if these points are valid or if my buddy is
overreacting but the bottom line is that he noticed them, so there's
something to be said about that. Is this movie racist? Well, racist or not
I can firmly say that I’m sick and tired of seeing black people placed
in films uniquely as the token
comic relief. You know how it goes: all they want is sex, to crack
one-liners left and right and not take any situation seriously.
Can we start giving black people “regular” parts in genre flicks
please?!?
But
the
flick does have a few gnarly things going for it to help digest the
nonsense. First off, there’s the sexual feast that will appeal to any
“porno fan”. Every smutty area is covered: threesomes (with two
sisters no less), strip joints (fun stuff), attempted rape and my
favorite: a motel complex filled with prostitutes. I affectionately called
that place “Whore Town”. There’s also the gore. This one doesn’t
hold back on the gross outs; the highlight being a dude who blows his
head off and then seeing the guy’s noggin reconstruct itself…groovy.
And last but certainly not least, there’s Patrick Lazard (Justin) who comes out of
this movie a big winner (his key scene with Hume Cromwell is "on" and belongs in a
better movie).
So
is "Species 2" a good picture? Not by a long shot. Is it a
"so bad that it's good"
movie? I think that it is because my friend and I were laughing our heads off and
going “holy shit” at every tit and gore scene. The gutter ingredients
are certainly there and the occasional awful lines (Madsen has the best
one near the end…what a howler!) definitely help make this one an
enjoyable romp for all the wrong reasons. This flick is not about
mating…it’s about fucking. Put on your rubber and dive in!
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| ACTING: |
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Michael
Madsen (Preston) coasts through this movie. You really feel like he doesn’t
want to be there. It’s a throwaway performance. Great delivery on the
one liner in the end though; it had me in stitches. Natasha Henstridge
(Eve) is not the star of this movie and doesn’t do much but run in slow
motion (Bionic Woman style) or lie down. At least she takes off her
clothes in the end. Marg Helgenberger (Laura) is so "off" but
the bad script
doesn’t help her one bit. And unlike the original "Species", her
chemistry with Madsen here is non-existent. I felt embarrassed for her
sometimes.
Mykeltie Williamson (Dennis) delivers those jokes like a champ
but it's too bad that I didn’t care about his character. Mr. Screenwriter's
fault…again. Justin Lazard (Patrick) rocks! I’d love to see him in
more films. His emotional scenes worked, his menacing aura is very strong
and I did sometimes feel sympathy for his character. His performance is an
accomplishment considering that he’s acting in a piece of shite. Good
show! James Cromwell (Senator) can also hold his head up high. His
performance is down to earth and realistic. George Dzundza (Colonel) is
very annoying. Think Fred Flintstone with rabies. His delivery is way off
and I for one wanted his character to get it big time!
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| GORE: |
What
a wet flick. We get babies bursting out of chick’s bellies, a gnarly
tentacle attack, the aforementioned priceless exploding head and some
creature effects that work sometimes (I dug the end male beast).
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| T
& A: |
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Everybody
gets some! Dudes get the countless tit shots and a full nude Henstridge
(be patient) and the dudettes get a good looking and fit Justin Lazard
showing off his fit upper body (sorry gals, no butt shot…almost though).
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| DIRECTING: |
The
once promising Medak ("Romeo is Bleeding" wuz dope!) shows off his eye-candy
talents here. We get lots of slow motion, lots of zoom into dark places or
eyes, tilted angles up the wazoo and kool camera movements.
I will say that his quick cuts to the aliens in true form didn’t
work for me for two reasons. A) The aliens looked like plastic dolls and B)
There wasn’t a real purpose behind them. In the original, they were
Sil’s dreams, expressing what was going on inside her head, but here it
was clearly just for show.
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| SOUNDTRACK: |
An
underwhelming generic score.
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| BOTTOM LINE: |
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Species
2 is one dirty, sleazy whore that just doesn’t give a damn about
anything but slapping titties and blood in our faces. Fuck characters,
coherent storyline, good production values…it's all about flesh and
death. But sometimes a good
slut can go down well on a Sunday night…ya know…relieve tension. If
you’re in the mood for a cheap date, bend this one over and have a blast!
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| BULL'S EYE: |
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A
scene cut from the flick that could be found on the DVD release: Patrick
(Lazard) picking up some chick, going back to her place and finding out
that she’s a transvestite…he kills her.
Read
the Arrow's SPECIES review here
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this movie on The Arrow's HORROR BOARD
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2001 John
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