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American Pie: The Naked Mile
DVD disk
12.29.2006 By: Quigles
American Pie: The Naked Mile order
Director:
Joe Nussbaum

Actors:
John White
Steve Talley
Eugene Levy

Rating:
Movie:
Extras:
Overall:

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WHAT'S IT ABOUT?
Erik Stifler is having problems living up to the family name. His one shot to change that around is by scoring with some hot babe at the infamous college race, "The Naked Mile." Will he succeed? Will he go all the way? Will you even care?
IS IT A GOOD MOVIE?
THE NAKED MILE is better than BAND CAMP, the fifth "entry" in the AMERICAN PIE series. But is that even a compliment? All that's implying is the film isn't as horrendous as what many (myself included) would consider to be one of the worst movies of 2005. That's like the equivalent of me going up to a woman and saying, "Hey, you're not as much of an obnoxious bitch as Rosie O'Donnell." Fact of the matter is, this sequel pretty much sucks, and it being better than the previous installment doesn't mean squat.

Whereas the last movie was centered around Stifler's brother, this one centers around his cousin, Erik. On the positive side of things, at least they chose somebody who wasn't a hideously annoying Sean William Scott imitator (like Tad Hilgenbrink from BAND CAMP). Not many actors can be assholes and still be as likable as Scott was, so it was smart of them to veer away from that angle. On the other hand, another obnoxious/unfunny Stifler (named Dwight) comes into play about a third in and destroys everything I've just talked about. Good work, NAKED MILE. The other characters aren't much better. Erik's two friends get way too much screen time without being remotely compelling, and the three college girls they meet have acting skills equal to that of porn stars. Going from bad to worse is the addition of little people as the villains. What the hell were they thinking with that one?

Another big problem is the forced feel of certain sequences. Things just pop up randomly, and they don't flow nearly as well as the gags from the first three AMERICAN PIE movies. Two great examples are the football showdown (a pointless, lengthy music video?) and the boner competition (a painfully unfunny segment with two guys trying to accomplish goals with their rock-hard dongs). Acting as saving graces of the film are the surprisingly competent filmmaking (BAND CAMP was pure amateur hour), some occasionally funny moments (these are relegated more to small snippets of dialogue than anything else), and full-frontal female nudity. (Hey, I'm a teenage male. I'm allowed to praise a movie for its usage of female nudity. Deal with it.)
THE EXTRAS
If you liked the movie, you might like these.

Audio Commentary (with director Joe Nussbaum, writer Erik Lindsay, and actors Jake Siegel, John White, Ross Thomas & Steve Talley)

The Yoga Guide to Getting Girls (3:33): A dumbass visits a yoga class while an actress from the film talks about what to do and what not to do. Stupid.

The Bare Essentials (4:19): A featurette about actors needing to get their asses waxed.

Little People, Big Stunts (6:50): Deals with exactly what you'd think - little people doing stunts.

Life on The Naked Mile (16:38): A lame, standard making-of featurette.

There are also Deleted and Extended Scenes (6:07), and Outtakes (2:42).
FINAL DIAGNOSIS
To its credit, THE NAKED MILE is a better film than BAND CAMP. It also feels a lot more like an AMERICAN PIE movie than the latter did; just, not a very good one. Whereas the original three films based their plots around funny gags and compelling characters, this one bases its plot around not-so-funny (but exceedingly random) gags, and lame characters. It's still mildly entertaining, all things considered (read: it's got boobage), but not enough to make it worth a rental. Only see it if you liked BAND CAMP (did anybody?).
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