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I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer
DVD disk
07.25.2006 By: Quigles
I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer order
Director:
Sylvain White

Actors:
K.C. Clyde
Torrey DeVitto
Ben Easter

Rating:
Movie:
Extras:
Overall:

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WHAT'S IT ABOUT?
Teenagers getting killed by a guy in a raincoat.
IS IT A GOOD MOVIE?
Making unnecessary sequels is sinful. Making unnecessary straight-to-DVD sequels is even more even sinful. Making unnecessary straight-to-DVD sequels to movies that weren't even that great to begin with is the greatest sin of all. Well, actually, eating babies is the greatest sin of all... but this one's right up there. This movie is basically a minor reincarnation of the first film. A bunch of annoying teens act stupid, something bad happens, and then they keep it a secret, only to have it come back to haunt them the following year... in the shape of a guy in a raincoat and a hook (terrifying, no?). But there are a couple things this movie has that the other two didn't... NO-NAME ACTORS and a LOWER BUDGET. Baam! Take that you damn theatrical movies, with your moderate budgets and your properly cast actors!

This is one of those cheesy B-horror films that actually does work on the so-bad-it's-good scale. There are some classically stupid moments here, such as when a character is about to commit suicide but hears a noise. Despite the fact that he was mere moments away from slicing his wrists (with the actual hook from the killer, which he bought off eBay), he decides to postpone his adventure into the afterlife. He browses the area around him, and sees a tarp with something menacing-looking behind it. He tears it down, only to be spooked by a coat. "Coat", he says, obviously speaking out loud as to confirm that he really is looking at a coat. Then the fisherman actually kills him. It's sad, really. I mean, Mr. Suicidal had so much to live for... why did HE have to die? -- This is just one of many scenes that made me groan with laughter. Other such moments include the actual reveal of who the killer is (I was making jokes about who it actually might be, and then I actually turned out to be right - that's just sad), and brilliantly written dialogue like, "You're lucky you have a chainsaw, douche!" And then on top of those things, there's also about a hundred cheap scares... during every scene. So hey, lets make another...

Drinking Game!!!
Every time a character pops of nowhere, or a cop bursts into the scene, or some machinery suddenly turns on... you have to take a drink. If you take a shot every time a "boo" scare takes place, by the end of the movie you will be so smashed that you won't know Uwe Boll from a big slimy asshole. Then again, not many people can tell the difference when they're sober, either.
THE EXTRAS
We are treated to two special features. Joyous day.

Audio Commentary (with director Sylvain White): This is a fairly blasť yak-track, with Sylvain pretty much explaining much of the on-screen antics and discussing his ideas behind them. The only thing I found of interest was that after he mentioned that all the people who were in the carnival were just regular people (not extras), I noticed that literally every person in the background kept looking at the camera as they walked by. Funny shite.

Making of I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer (26:39): I liked some of the behind-the-scenes footage, but other than that, this featurette didn't show much of interest. It was mostly people talking about how great it was working with other people.

There are also a number of Previews (8, to be exact).
FINAL DIAGNOSIS
As pure schlocky horror entertainment, you could do a whole lot worse than this next entry in the I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER franchise. At the very least, it's worth a laugh. I watched this flick with a bunch of friends, and throughout the entire movie we just couldn't stop cracking jokes about how stupid some of it was. Suffice it to say, I had a great time. And as long as you don't take any of it seriously (which you shouldn't if you've seen even five minutes of the previous entries), this movie should have you hooked! (Oh dear god, did I really just make that pun? Yes... yes I did. Kill me now.)

Hey folks! Stay tuned for the next sequel... Just In Case You Forgot, I'll Still Always Know What You Did Last Summer.
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