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Jonah Hex
BLU-RAY disk
Oct 28, 2010 By: Chris Bumbray
Jonah Hex order download
Director:
Jimmy Hayward

Actors:
Josh Brolin
Megan Fox
John Malkovich

Rating:
Movie:
Extras:
Overall:

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WHAT'S IT ABOUT?
JONAH HEX (James Brolin), a former Confederate soldier turned scarred avenger, pursues the rogue general (John Malkovich) that mangled his face, and murdered his family.
IS IT A GOOD MOVIE?
Ah, the sorrow and the shame of JONAH HEX. Iím not going to pretend I know a thing about the JONAH HEX comics (in fact, Iím pretty ignorant of comics in general), I was excited to hear that Josh Brolin, one of my favorite actors, would be starring in a Western vigilante flick made by Neveldine/Taylor, the team behind CRANK. Hell yes I thought to myself. What could possibly go wrong?

Plenty it turns out. Truth be told, this film was probably doomed before the cameras started rolling, as Neveldine/Taylor were let go and replaced by the now infamous Jimmy Hayward (HORTON HEARS A WHO). This turned out to be a fatal mistake, as anyone who knows Neveldine/Taylorís work will tell you that their screenplays are probably impossible to film, unless you happen to be Neveldine or Taylor. Having Hayward direct JONAH HEX, would be like having him direct CRANK.

Watching the eighty minute JONAH HEX, itís clear that the film that hit theaters and is now on blu-ray is not the film that Hayward turned into the studio. Reportedly, about a third of the film was reshot (supposedly by Francis Lawrence), including the whole doomsday weapon plot that seems like something ripped out of WILD, WILD WEST. Nowhere is the more apparent that the hilariously bad final showdown between Malkovich and Brolin, which cuts back and forth between their actual fight, and some weird vision Hex is having. Obviously two versions of this showdown was filmed, and instead of sanely using one, both versions were used by cross-cutting between the two.

Another victim of the cutting room floor is the supporting cast, including Michael Shannon, who turns up as a carnival impresario in the background for one scene. I really doubt they would have hired someone of his stature to use as an extra, and Iíd bet he anchored a significant subplot that was dropped.

Itís too bad though, as JONAH HEX had potential. Brolin manages to keep his dignity more or less intact here, which is a truly Herculean effort in a piece of garbage like this. He also fits the Western setting, and luckily, the Coen Bros. upcoming TRUE GRIT will hopefully redeem both Brolin and the western.

As for Malkovich, he probably gives the worst performance of his career as the villain, Quentin Turnbull. His lazy, half-assed approach actually enraged me when I stupidly paid 11 bucks to see this in theaters, but luckily, the recent RED has undone the damage JONAH HEX did. Poor Megan Fox is probably the biggest victim of JONAH HEX, with this being a horrible showcase. All she does is strut around like an Angelina Jolie wannabe- but alas, sheís no Jolie.
THE EXTRAS
Thereís actually a lot more extras here than I anticipated, as I thought JONAH HEX would have just been dumped to disc without any features. Instead, we get a PIP Behind the Scenes track, where everyone seems blissfully unaware of how bad the film is. Next up, The Inside Story of JONAH HEX which explains the comic origins of the character. Then, we get additional scenes which are nowhere near as extensive as youíd think, considering how much ended up on the cutting room floor.

The Combo Pack also comes with the DVD version of the film, as well as a digital copy, so you NEVER have to leave home without JONAH HEX. Whew.
FINAL DIAGNOSIS
JONAH HEX is truly a poor excuse for an action flick, and itís without a doubt the biggest flop of the year (so far) and something that will go down alongside ďfilmsĒ like BATTLEFIELD EARTH, and BALLISTIC: ECKS VS. SEVER as an example of just how bad a high-concept film could go with the wrong people at the helm.
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