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Strike Back Below!

Judd Apatow’s FUNNY PEOPLE might have been more well-received had it been called ‘Semi-Amusing People.’ Or ‘Somewhat Humorous People.’ Putting ‘funny’ in the title of an Adam Sandler movie is asking for it.

Apatow turns some kind of corner with ‘Funny People.’ It has nowhere near the laughs of his previous two gems, ‘Knocked Up’ or ‘The 40-Year-Old Virgin,’ and it plays much better as a drama. It’s very similar in style to Cameron Crowe, with excellent use of music and a few gut-punch scenes that’ll wipe the smile off your face (Sandler’s speech at the thanksgiving dinner might be his finest two minutes).

It’s a film about death. Specifically, preparing for death. Sandler, essentially playing himself, is a huge comedy star named George Simmons who has made a tonne of crap movies. When he gets diagnosed with a fatal blood disease, he goes about making amends and getting back to his comedy roots, which includes taking an amateur comic (Seth Rogan) under his wing and making him his assistant. More importantly, he wants his old girlfriend (Leslie Mann) back, despite the fact she has a husband and two kids. It leads to a terrific sequence towards the end of the film, when Mann’s husband (Eric Bana) arrives to ratchet up the tension. Again, this stuff is more uncomfortable than funny, and people expecting non-stop laughs with this movie didn’t leave happy.

Sandler went through the same thing with Paul Thomas Anderson’s ‘Punch-Drunk Love,’ and while ‘Funny People’ isn’t quite as polarizing, it’s easily his best performance.

ANGELS & DEMONS picks up the pace a bit after ‘The Da Vinci Code,’ but it’s more of the same Vatican-provoking silliness. Tom Hanks returns, looking glummer than ever as symbologist Robert Langdon, and is summoned to Rome after a Pope dies, four Cardinals are kidnapped, there’s an anti-matter bomb somewhere, and the long-dormant Illuminati have returned. Still much too long, with painful plot twists. The scariest part? There’s actually a European company called CERN experimenting with anti-matter. I’m sure that’ll end well.

Back when Norman Jewison was slated to make ‘Malcolm X,’ Spike Lee blasted the project and said a white director had no business making the film. Since he’s all about qualifications, I counter with this: A lousy Knicks fan has no business making a movie about Kobe Bryant. I swear he made KOBE DOIN’ WORK this boring on purpose, letting Bryant do his own commentary on some meaningless mid-season game against the Spurs. Yes, it shows what a focused, relentless player he is … like we needed Spike Lee for that. An unforgivably dull documentary on one of the greatest players ever.

FOUR CHRISTMASES hit theatres last November, making its dozens of fans wait until this November for the DVD. I realize Christmas movies are hard to peg, and it’s impossible to tell which ones will become classics, but come on … the ‘dysfunctional family’ thing is played out. Even with Vince Vaughan and Reese Witherspoon, this dreck uses the same old playlist (oh, there’s the weird brother … hey, there’s the sassy grandma) with the usual phony sentiment tacked on, ‘cause it’s the holidays and all. Peter Billingsley – yes, Ralphie from ‘A Christmas Story’ – is an executive producer.

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