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moviemaniac8210
06-20-2006, 04:47 PM
Paris' Perfume Encounter Stinks

There was a whiff of something unseemly in the air at the launch of Paris Hilton's new perfume, "Just Me," on Friday in New York, but surprisingly enough it wasn't coming from her signature scent.

The New York Daily News says the self-promoting starlet was signing autographs for a mostly female crowd at Macy's when a guy with a mustache appeared at the front of the line (yes, people actually waited in line to get her John Hancock).

Paris asked how he'd like his photo signed. The reply: "Make it out to 'The Guy Who Has My Storage Locker Stuff.'"

According to the paper, the hirsute man in question was none other than David Hans Schmidt, the self-described "Sultan of Sleaze" who acquired oodles of photos, videos, diaries, financial records and other ultra-personal effects belonging to Hilton earlier this year after she failed to pay her storage facility bill.

"That stuff can't be published," a "wide-eyed" Paris purportedly told Schmidt, who replied, "Like your sex video?"

Schmidt, who helpfully brought along a childhood picture of Hilton holding baby sister Nicky to remind her of who he is, was originally asking $20 million for the contents of the locker, but may be willing to sell them back to the "Simple Life" star for the right price.

Hilton has reportedly agreed to meet with the porn peddler in Los Angeles and, perhaps in an attempt to score a discount on her prized keepsakes, graciously autographed his photo, "To David, Love Paris Hilton xoxo."

Source: MSN


Have at it :D

daddiefatsacks
06-20-2006, 05:17 PM
that's crazy, another paris thread in this forum? who would have thunk it?

Scarfather
06-20-2006, 09:08 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!

"I stole a bunch of your childhood photos you cunt, give me money."
"OKAY, THAT'S HOT!"

Good for him.

RustyRazor
06-21-2006, 09:32 AM
So her new perfume is called "Just Me".
So the fragance can be described as a mix between:

Vagisil
Coconut Love Oil
Mentos

and

Sea bass?

They can't stock the shelves fast enough, I tells ya!

Said it before, I'll say it again - "SHE IS ONE STUPID BITCH!"

I'm the manager of a storage facility and when people don't pay, after 60 days, we can legally put your stuff up for auction.

As much money as this bitch's daddy has and she gets a piece of, she couldn't afford to keep up the payments on a storage spot? Well, if she couldn't or her "people" neglected to do so, this guy deserves to come into her things AND her moronic ass deserves to kick out however much money she will to get her disease covered memoirs back.

To quote the immortals:

"Smooth move, Ex-Lax."

bigred760
06-21-2006, 12:47 PM
I'm still shocked that people waited in line for an autograph. That's grounds for suicide on my part right there.

So her new perfume is called "Just Me".
So the fragance can be described as a mix between:

Vagisil
Coconut Love Oil
Mentos

and

Sea bass?

I think that saved my life. Laughter is the best medicine you know. :D

RustyRazor
06-21-2006, 02:09 PM
BTW*


VIVA LA PARIS HILTON THREADS!

You keep makin' 'em and I'll keep postin' in em!

It's SO theraputic to vent on the "Rich and Moronic" and I'm your host, Rusty Leech!

VIVA LA PARIS HILTON THREADS!

Scarfather
06-21-2006, 04:39 PM
Fuck the storage facility Rusty, you need to write professionally.

outsyder
06-21-2006, 04:53 PM
So he wants $20 million?

I guess Paris can forgo her coke and sex binging for a couple days to make up the difference.

moviemaniac8210
06-21-2006, 06:21 PM
Originally posted by RustyRazor
VIVA LA PARIS HILTON THREADS! You keep makin' 'em and I'll keep postin' in em!

I'm sure Paris Hilton will keep busy for quite some time!:D

RustyRazor
06-23-2006, 08:54 AM
Originally posted by Scarfather
Fuck the storage facility Rusty, you need to write professionally.


Muchas gracias, Scarfather.

I'd say "that's hot", but everytime someone says that, Paris Hilton's evil power grows stronger and her eyes seperate farther apart from one another.

I'm serious. That eye, by the end of the year will be on the same side as the other one.

Freaky, I know.:D