The Postmaster General
01-05-2007, 12:05 PM
The Back To The Future box set was released just before Xmas some years back. Discs 2 and 3 of the set were defective due to a letterboxing issue. In many scenes hoverboards were cut out, gags were missing, and chaos was abound with in my normal appreciation for these fine motion pictures. Films I had seen on days following the day when I should have realized how fanfuckingtastic the next day would be.
Cut ahead, another staple of my mideighties addled head had surfaced, one upon which I had shouted at the Gods for as this was a release that unlike I had the overwhelming fortune bestowed on me in VHS format, these were releases that I had never held and only seen in pastel reruns on days made dreary by horizontal stretching caused by some silly SpikeTV logo. Yes, they would be releasing Miami Vice and I would be able to hear it in Dolby Digital blazing like it was a far-out concept to party like its 1999.
What I get instead are cheaply manufactured double sided artless discs void of any booklets, commentary, or meat other than a defining show of both the 1980s and modern cop shows. While I did have more enjoyment due to correct images on my TV, I was still somewhat shaken by no one working on this as I'd waited so long.
Then - something that'd perked my interest, brought joy to my eyes, and once more instilled Sudden Positivity to my Universal Home Video collection. While not a total Crown Jewel, she was a mighty beast, a time capsule never seen in its completion before. Wind back the doobie machine to 1975 for the Complete First Season of SNL. Live in my muthafucking 2006 apartment beyatch.
Now this became the most confusing and frustrating release of all. I opened the case to discover this pretty quickly. Now, I searched for an image of the disc layout, but can't find any - I'd seen them before, but they must be getting confiscated by Universal because too many bloggers were pointing out how fucking stupid this is. You have eight discs divided into 4 sections, with for instance Disc One off set in front of Disc Two. I hope you are with me here - essentially, to get to Disc Two you must remove Disc One - likewise for 3 & 4, and so-on.
There was a cool photo booklet, accompanied by text - great. But aside from that, this was a barebones DVD. 1975, man. It's 2006. What the hell was happening in all that time. No interviews. None of these people went on to do other projects in the media? Oh, oh, my bad - we do get the cast auditions. Yeah, I forgot about that - mainly because it was like watching insanely inferior versions of material used on the show, but I can't complain too much for the effort there.
The one thing I am obsessing about. The one thing that is driving me crazy. The bonus disc - which as I said, includes only auditions - it's unlabeled. This drives me crazy. Yes, I first tried D1, then D8, but I missed it on D8, so I went through each disc and not just through each disc, remember - I had to take out disc one, try it, then disc two, then when that didn't work I had to remove disc 1 so I could put back disc 2, then I had to put back D1, now onto D3.
Don't get me wrong Universal, you own the rights to some really great shit, but to your home video division, you douchebag shithead donkey ear goose fucking cocksuckers - get your shit together and start using the talent you are paid to have. Creation is an art and right now you own an artistry of shit. I'm onto you, and am going EXTENSIVELY out of my way to research urge word-of-mouth about your future projects.
Oh, yeah - and shame on you for releasing mutherfucking Charles In Charge on DVD before you release Saturday Night Live. You dipshits.
So, fellow schmoes - here is a list of Universals Home video releases: http://www.tvshowsondvd.com/releaselistshows.cfm?StartRow=1&Genre=0&Studio=8
Which ones do you have issues with?
Cut ahead, another staple of my mideighties addled head had surfaced, one upon which I had shouted at the Gods for as this was a release that unlike I had the overwhelming fortune bestowed on me in VHS format, these were releases that I had never held and only seen in pastel reruns on days made dreary by horizontal stretching caused by some silly SpikeTV logo. Yes, they would be releasing Miami Vice and I would be able to hear it in Dolby Digital blazing like it was a far-out concept to party like its 1999.
What I get instead are cheaply manufactured double sided artless discs void of any booklets, commentary, or meat other than a defining show of both the 1980s and modern cop shows. While I did have more enjoyment due to correct images on my TV, I was still somewhat shaken by no one working on this as I'd waited so long.
Then - something that'd perked my interest, brought joy to my eyes, and once more instilled Sudden Positivity to my Universal Home Video collection. While not a total Crown Jewel, she was a mighty beast, a time capsule never seen in its completion before. Wind back the doobie machine to 1975 for the Complete First Season of SNL. Live in my muthafucking 2006 apartment beyatch.
Now this became the most confusing and frustrating release of all. I opened the case to discover this pretty quickly. Now, I searched for an image of the disc layout, but can't find any - I'd seen them before, but they must be getting confiscated by Universal because too many bloggers were pointing out how fucking stupid this is. You have eight discs divided into 4 sections, with for instance Disc One off set in front of Disc Two. I hope you are with me here - essentially, to get to Disc Two you must remove Disc One - likewise for 3 & 4, and so-on.
There was a cool photo booklet, accompanied by text - great. But aside from that, this was a barebones DVD. 1975, man. It's 2006. What the hell was happening in all that time. No interviews. None of these people went on to do other projects in the media? Oh, oh, my bad - we do get the cast auditions. Yeah, I forgot about that - mainly because it was like watching insanely inferior versions of material used on the show, but I can't complain too much for the effort there.
The one thing I am obsessing about. The one thing that is driving me crazy. The bonus disc - which as I said, includes only auditions - it's unlabeled. This drives me crazy. Yes, I first tried D1, then D8, but I missed it on D8, so I went through each disc and not just through each disc, remember - I had to take out disc one, try it, then disc two, then when that didn't work I had to remove disc 1 so I could put back disc 2, then I had to put back D1, now onto D3.
Don't get me wrong Universal, you own the rights to some really great shit, but to your home video division, you douchebag shithead donkey ear goose fucking cocksuckers - get your shit together and start using the talent you are paid to have. Creation is an art and right now you own an artistry of shit. I'm onto you, and am going EXTENSIVELY out of my way to research urge word-of-mouth about your future projects.
Oh, yeah - and shame on you for releasing mutherfucking Charles In Charge on DVD before you release Saturday Night Live. You dipshits.
So, fellow schmoes - here is a list of Universals Home video releases: http://www.tvshowsondvd.com/releaselistshows.cfm?StartRow=1&Genre=0&Studio=8
Which ones do you have issues with?