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DoCk
08-10-2007, 10:15 AM
We’re going to apologize in advance to all the straight men out there, for ruining their Jessica Alba fantasies, but here goes…..

Jessica Alba(before she was Jessica Alba) used to date Derek Jeter, the serial celebrity dater, who plays for the NY Yankees. Well, our source who worked for one of their camps, had to refill her Valtrex prescription for her on a regular basis! Guess who she got it from…that’s right…dirty Derek Jeter.

You know what this means don’t YOU?!! All of his other famous relationships could have contracted the STD TOO! Derek’s most famous sexual conquest include Mariah Carey, Jessica Alba, Vanessa Minnillo and most recently Jessica Biel. Which means JT could have it AAAHHH!!

LADIES STOP SLEEPING WITH DEREK JETER!! 70% of all spreading happens when there is no sign of an outbreak ( we heard on the commercial, we don’t study Herpes or anything like that.)

It’s snarky we know but we’re doing this as a community service to Hollywood, to warn the rest of you young starlets to stay away from those baseball guys cuz they are DIR - TY!!!

But then again, who doesn’t have herpes in Hollywood, right?

source: http://laragmag.com/2007/08/09/la-rag-mag-exclusive-jessica-alba-got-herpes-from-derek-jeter/

http://www.lossip.com/wp-content/uploads/jessica-alba-at-the-beach.jpg
dennisv
08-10-2007, 10:52 AM
Dumbest news ever...
Preston_79
08-10-2007, 10:55 AM
Hmmmm Herpes, yum.

I'd still fuck her.
teenkiller
08-10-2007, 10:56 AM
Not that I'm real big on Alba or anything but I don't exactly see why I should believe this. Because THEY say it's true? I don't even know who they are. Heh... dirty Derek Jeter... Well thats all for now GOoD JOURNEY my fellow schmoes.
RandalGraves
08-10-2007, 11:02 AM
Originally posted by Preston_79
Hmmmm Herpes, yum.

I'd still fuck her.

Couldn't of said it better myself! haha
JJFlamingo
08-10-2007, 11:45 AM
Thus far, the only one we know FOR SURE that has it is Paris Hilton. This is just unsubstandiated rumor and gossip...:D
RustyRazor
08-10-2007, 12:37 PM
...I could say a number of things (for those who remember the famous thread from Scorpio24 that I frequented), but I'll just say rumor is simply that until it becomes fact.

Now if it becomes fact...wait til you see THAT post....
Silverload
08-10-2007, 01:05 PM
Originally posted by Preston_79
Hmmmm Herpes, yum.

I'd still fuck her.

Exactly, it would so be worth it. I would walk around public pointing to my herpes saying “I caught this shit from Jessica Alba!” and everyone would applaud. :D
NuclearMisfit
08-10-2007, 03:08 PM
I think Kurt Cobain said it right "I'll kiss your open sores"
thedudeman69
08-10-2007, 03:36 PM
You know, if she has the herpes by the time she reprises her role in Fantastic Four 3... it will totally stay on her when she goes invisible.
Shockwave
08-11-2007, 05:32 AM
Originally posted by Silverload
Exactly, it would so be worth it. I would walk around public pointing to my herpes saying “I caught this shit from Jessica Alba!” and everyone would applaud. :D

Hahahahaha.:p
RustyRazor
08-11-2007, 10:43 AM
Originally posted by thedudeman69
You know, if she has the herpes by the time she reprises her role in Fantastic Four 3... it will totally stay on her when she goes invisible.

Ewww, but :D :D :D :D