Commercials that are Fucking Dumb

[smok3h]

I've noticed that many commercials I see on TV are just retarded. Let me start with Levi Jean commercials. They are the dumbest things I've ever seen. The one where the guy is pulling up his pants and he pulls up the city through his apartment.. .like wtf, that's just stupid. Every Levi commercial just tries to be hip or cool but ends up being retarded.

Pretty much all hair restoration commercials are trash. Let's start with Procede commercials. These ones have that guy nobody has ever heard of Giussepe Franco talking like he's some superstar, when all he is is just some hairdresser in Beverly Hills. At one point in the commercial he says, "Hey, I'm Guiseppe Franco, I'm not putting my name on the line for a product that doesn't work." Well I have two responses to that: 1) you don't have a name or reputation with the public, so stfu, 2) and you are getting paid to the commercial, like you give a fuck if it works or not. The other thing that is retarded about these commercial is that it always shows beautiful women with these guys now that they have their hair back. Yeah, you've sure tricked me commercial, as soon as I get hair beautiful women will be all over me! One thing that makes me laugh about the Procede commercials though is that it will show the back of a guys head and then he spins around (obviously he is on some rotating platform) and has this big stupid grin on his face. That shit always makes me laugh.

The other shitty hair restoration commercial is the Hair Club for men (I think that's what it is) anyways, it's not as bad as the Procede commercials, but it has some stupid shit in it too. For instance, there is this one old guy with white facial hair who is like "Life is about feeling good and having fun! And 80% of feeling good is looking good." Now obviously he just pulled that statistic out of his ass, how is he allowed to say that shit on TV, haha? Then watch at the end of the commercial for this black guy who is staring off, and then he grins and you can see him mouth "YES" and pumps his fist, that's just comedy.

Finally, the other fucking dumb commercial I'm going to talk about is this new Viagra commercial. ROFL, have you guys seen this one? It's a bunch of guys sitting around playing instruments singing "VIVA VIAGRA!" to the tune of "Viva Las Vegas." I mean, how any self respecting man could act in that commercial is beyond me, it's got to be on the dumbest fucking things I've ever seen. I laugh just thinking about it.

What are some dumb commercials that stick out in your guys minds?

[Duke Nukem]

Fanta Wanta! Don't you wanta...Fanta Wanta! Don't you wanta...Fanta Wanta! Don't you wanta...Fanta Wanta! Don't you wanta...Fanta Wanta! Don't you wanta...Fanta Wanta! . . . Fanta Red! . . . Fanta Orange! . . . Fanta Purple! . . . Fanta Grape! . . . Fanta Wanta! Don't you wanta...Fanta Wanta! Don't you wanta...Fanta Wanta! Don't you wanta...Fanta Wanta! Don't you wanta...Fanta Wanta! Don't you wanta...

*Signals Michael Myers to put me out my misery / Michael Myers shows up, whips out his knife (Shing!), and proceeds to stab me to death (Shing! Shing! Sha-shing! Shing! Splatter! Splatter!...)*

My gosh, summers 2003 and 2004 at the movies were awful...

[Brando @$$ Fat]

I hate the Sierra Mist commercials. They take Sierra Mist so fucking seriously even though it's no different than 7Up or Sprite.

[FatSakHead]

Any Above the Influence commercial.

[Frank the Tank]

I don't really pay attention to commercials, but that dog talking to girl pot commercial, really made me want to get high.

[smok3h]

Originally posted by Frank the Tank
I don't really pay attention to commercials, but that dog talking to girl pot commercial, really made me want to get high.
lol yeah, that commercial is so dumb. LIke honestly, I LOVE my dog when I'm high. That commercial doesn't even make sense.

[Potzer! 37]

I've never been high, but if I knew my dog would talk to me, I would so get high....that'd be awesome, as opposed to a downer...it's like those warnings in penis drug commericails "If erection lasts longer than 12 hrs consult a doctor"...nay nay. If erection lasts longer than 12 hrs you have become a God and should continue to show off your mighty stalion until it withers...

[FLAME_ON]

Two that come to mind...
Head On (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GOvFIxUz2XY)
5-Hour Energy

[Cronos]

Commercials are one of the reasons I stopped watching television, they're retarded, don't make sense and just end up making me go WTF and never want to buy what they're advertising.

[vesaker]

Originally posted by Cronos
Commercials are one of the reasons I stopped watching television, they're retarded, don't make sense and just end up making me go WTF and never want to buy what they're advertising.

same here, commercials and reality TV killed television for me

[RustyRazor]

I've got a ton of fucking commercials in mind, but one I just saw springs to mind.

"JUST FOR MEN HAIR COLORING"

A grey haired, grey bearded gentleman is in a bar, Clyde Frazier and Keith Hernandez are doing play by play (???) and "old grey beard" approaches an attractive blond woman who promptly motions for him to fuck off.

"No play for Mr. Grey!"

But using Just For Men grey hair charade device, only FIVE FUCKING MINUTES LATER, he returns from the bathroom (I guess) and the same woman is all over him.


...let's see:

1 ) Is this woman either so fucking drunk or a nimrod that she doesn't realize this is the same geezer she wouldn't give the time of day?
2 ) Do we live in a society that thinks grey hair, even premature grey means you're no longer active or outgoing? (Wait...we do. I hate this fucking society!)
3 ) What will her reaction be when they get back to his condo and that crappy beard colorizer starts wash off in her crotch when he's "dining downtown"?


There are a LOT more idiotic ones out there.
Ad execs don't think much of people.

[FLAME_ON]

ALL pharmaceutical commercials. Fucking. Dumb.

[Jerk Shapiro]

Did you guys know that at 3 p.m., when your energy is low, Robert Goulet arrives to mess with your stuff?





Ha... I actually enjoy that commercial.

[vesaker]

Acctaully theres one commercial i always like to see and its the mock commercial about the common house Hippo, man if that were true i would have a house full of those little guys lol

[Brando @$$ Fat]

Oh, and how could I forget. That body spray commercial, I don't remember the brand exactly but it wasn't Axe. Some chick in a white room.


"I don't want to smell your body spray from here....


or here......



or here.....



Here's nice."


Any chick who bends over backwards for $3 bodyspray is a cheap whore.

[Le_Big_Mac]

All forms of commercialism are stupid because they require what they're selling to sound serious and cool.

I mean, seriously, they're making a spin-off series for the Geico cavemen.

[smok3h]

Originally posted by Brando @$$ Fat
Oh, and how could I forget. That body spray commercial, I don't remember the brand exactly but it wasn't Axe. Some chick in a white room.


"I don't want to smell your body spray from here....


or here......



or here.....



Here's nice."


Any chick who bends over backwards for $3 bodyspray is a cheap whore.
RGX I believe, but yeah, fuck those commercials.

And I'll to be the first to admit that I am going to watch the caveman show, haha, I will at least give it a chance.

[DarthWade]

First of all, did you ever notice that when there's a commercial you hate it always seems to appear about 50 thousand times a day? Especially during one of your favorite shows?

I have a lot of ones that I hate, but I especially hate the locally-made ones. Everyone has seen these....your're watching TV and a commercial comes on from your local Car Dealership, Electronics Store, etc...and it stars the owner who thinks he's a riot, or his wife or his bratty kids.

[RustyRazor]

Originally posted by Brando @$$ Fat
Oh, and how could I forget. That body spray commercial, I don't remember the brand exactly but it wasn't Axe. Some chick in a white room.


"I don't want to smell your body spray from here....


or here......



or here.....



Here's nice."


Any chick who bends over backwards for $3 bodyspray is a cheap whore.

She also talks about liking guys that are "real".
If you use a body spray, it's masking your "real" scent.

If I sprayed it in her eyes, they'd "real-ly" burn, I bet.

(RUSTYRAZOR INCORPORATED does not condone violence towards women in any way, shape, or form...but that chick is just REAL-LY annoying.)

[DarthWade]

Originally posted by RustyRazor
She also talks about liking guys that are "real".
If you use a body spray, it's masking your "real" scent.

If I sprayed it in her eyes, they'd "real-ly" burn, I bet.

(RUSTYRAZOR INCORPORATED does not condone violence towards women in any way, shape, or form...but that chick is just REAL-LY annoying.)

Speaking of these ads...the "boom chicka-waa-waa" commercials are godawful.

[thedudeman69]

I hate those Pepsi Max commericals


"WAKE UP EVERYBODY!!!"


Do you really need to put ginseng in a fucking soda? I like Vault, but goddamn, Pepsi is desperate to sell some soda.

[horror junkie]

Commercials are crap, but who can resist the Bruce Campbell Old Spice commercials??

The answer is no one, absolutely no one

[bigred760]

Some are good . . . most are bad.

What baffles me is that people actually think of this stupid stuff and pitches it to a higher up and they agree to it.

[RustyRazor]

Originally posted by bigred760
Some are good . . . most are bad.

What baffles me is that people actually think of this stupid stuff and pitches it to a higher up and they agree to it.


Yep.
Same people that bought Twisted Sister's "We're Not Gonna Take It" to play in a commercial about maxi pads.

Do I need to associate these two things?
Do women WANT to associate Dee Snyder and that time of the month?

Yuppie advertising exec scum.

[Badbird]

Scissors cut paper! I win!

I'm cleaning the litter box!

I'm cleaning the litter box!

I'm cleaning the litter box!

[smok3h]

Ugh, how about that new Rice Crispies commercial. It has this mom and god, i can't even tell if it's a little boy or a little girl, but it has this really stupid guitar playing in the background, trying to make it all serious, and the whole commercial is this kid talking, and you can't understand a word the kid says except "soccer".. and I'm not even sure if he says soccer! And to top it all off the kid is blatantly staring off camera at people producing the commercial.. like the camera operators, etc. etc. It's just dumb. Fuck Rice Crispies.

[mutesaint]

Originally posted by horror junkie
Commercials are crap, but who can resist the Bruce Campbell Old Spice commercials??

The answer is no one, absolutely no one


Thats because Bruce Cambell is the fucking man and those commercials rock:cool:

[smok3h]

Originally posted by mutesaint
Thats because Bruce Cambell is the fucking man and those commercials rock:cool:
hahaha yeah... I actually went out and bought that after seeing the commercials :D

[mutesaint]

I want to know who directed those commercials because he is the man(assuming he had at least some creative input in the idea)

[Scarfather]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AAkiXLeyelQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3rklKyFMUME (http://)

These commercials didn't get on my nerves, they blew up my fucking nervous system, every time I saw one I just got angry and started punching things.

I think I know why:

Why the fuck do these commercials even exist? It's a fuckin gas station. We've got sandwiches and bathrooms! Yippee!

[Weapon X]

http://www.boomspeed.com/big_josh/IDK_My_BFF_Jill.jpg

[Duke Nukem]

Originally posted by Weapon X
http://www.boomspeed.com/big_josh/IDK_My_BFF_Jill.jpg

Thank you. You are a savior.

[Inglorious]

Originally posted by Weapon X
http://www.boomspeed.com/big_josh/IDK_My_BFF_Jill.jpg

Some of the funniest shit Ive seen ALLL day!

[RustyRazor]

Originally posted by Weapon X
http://www.boomspeed.com/big_josh/IDK_My_BFF_Jill.jpg

Very nice.
Very nice.

[FatSakHead]

Any Geico commercial.

Hey,assholes at Geico: when are you going to realize you're not fuckin funny?

[Badbird]

Originally posted by FatSakHead
Any Geico commercial.

Hey,assholes at Geico: when are you going to realize you're not fuckin funny?

Looks like someone woke up on the wrong side of the rock.

[SplatterMaster5]

Only repetitive commercial I liked in the last year would be that Maynards gum ad with the girl walking down the street multiplying with that relaxing music in the background. But for commercials I hate, the Future Shop ones get on my nerves along with the beyond annoying Telus commercials with the fish.

[Dorrito the Imp]

All anti-smoking/drug ads that aren't by Truth are just the most idiotic, condescending, sophomorically argued pieces of tripe ever, and even Truth has started showing signs of decline. "Can I buy a light bullett? Hurrr, there's no such thing as a light bullett! Smoking is bad." Striking lack of quality for those guys.

The head-on commercials are the only ones that really aggrevate me, because the lame-ass joke of their commercial is how lame-ass their commercial is, as if they're clever for observing it, and then of course you can't tell people how much you hate those commercials because everyone thinks you're buying into and enjoying the joke of the commercial.

One thing I've noticed- pretty much every major company has had an ad or a series of ads that had some sort of comedic edge/ originality at some point in the last whatever years, and maybe they weren't all actually worthy of a laugh, but I at least appreciated them for running an ad that didn't suck. This I have seen from every company except McDonald's. McDonald's has never, ever, gone for anything but an almost MTV-like appeal to be hip, with humor that delivers like some kind of gen-X family circus. Anyone else notice this? Taco Bell's kind of the same way, but seeing Carmen Elektra makes me giggle, so they're slightly off the hook.

[pablo_super1!]

Yea those Mcdonalds especially when that guys throws his coffee on those kids if those were my kids or that was me I'd get up and beat the shit out of that guy and steal his prize.

[RustyRazor]

Originally posted by pablo_super1!
Yea those Mcdonalds especially when that guys throws his coffee on those kids if those were my kids or that was me I'd get up and beat the shit out of that guy and steal his prize.

I'd hold 'em still for you as long as we can split the winnings.


How about that car commercial with Kelsey Grammar?
"Duh".

All right! I get it! One fucking commercial drives the point home!
Son of a bitch! They need four or five versions?!

[FatSakHead]

Personally, I think there's nothing more obnoxious than someone who laughs at a commercial. Makes me want to punch them in the face every time.

We could always use another Geico "caveman" commercial because for some inane reason or another there are people out there who actually find every single last million of them to be funny.

[smok3h]

Originally posted by FatSakHead
Personally, I think there's nothing more obnoxious than someone who laughs at a commercial. Makes me want to punch them in the face every time.


ummm what? How is finding a commercial obnoxious?

[I Am Legend]

Originally posted by FatSakHead
Personally, I think there's nothing more obnoxious than someone who laughs at a commercial. Makes me want to punch them in the face every time.

We could always use another Geico "caveman" commercial because for some inane reason or another there are people out there who actually find every single last million of them to be funny.

I actually like the Geico caveman commercials. :p

[RustyRazor]

Comedy is different from one person to the next.
Some stuff is midly funny, some stuff really hits the funny bone BUT some stuff is so friggin' childish or idiotic that no self respecting test audience would laugh at it.
How about that gooey Oreo pizza mustache commercial?
I used to do that when I was a kid.
WHEN I WAS A KID.

I think the Caveman commercials started out funny, they're a bit dated and creating a television show about them is ridiculous.

If they didn't do a sitcom with Clara Peller and her "Where's The Beef?" commercial, they shouldn't do this.

It's called "we're fresh out of ideas and don't want to pay anyone for new ones".

Same thing with these stupid commercials.
Dated references, unfunny ideas, shockingly appaling images.
Lazy advertising.

[I Am Legend]

Originally posted by RustyRazor
Comedy is different from one person to the next.
Some stuff is midly funny, some stuff really hits the funny bone BUT some stuff is so friggin' childish or idiotic that no self respecting test audience would laugh at it.
How about that gooey Oreo pizza mustache commercial?
I used to do that when I was a kid.
WHEN I WAS A KID.

I like that commercial as well.

Is there something wrong with me? :confused:

[jaw2929]

The fucking burger king commercials, where a coupla cunts (father and son apparently) are trapesing around in fucking giant burger costumes, bitching at one another for god knows fucking what. It's fucking lame, it's extremely UN-funny, and because of it, I'll never go to Burger King again.

See this is the thing, the fucking executives that spew out this nonsensical horse-shit don't realize that if you agitate the ever-loving fucking SHIT outta the consumer, it'll do exactly the OPPOSITE of what it's supposed to. I can't tell you how many motherfucking annoying commercials have completely turned me off of a product for good, when had I never seen (or had the commercial never been created to fucking begin with) I wouldnt've otherwise made a specific effort NOT to buy said product!

Fuck the anti-piracy ads... Fuck the caveman ads... Fuck the "truth" ads... Fuck the anti-pot ads (I fucking WISH my pets would speak to me when I get stoned, geezus christ on a wooden fucking cross!) and fuck the cunts that shit out these horrible abominations! :o

[Dorrito the Imp]

Originally posted by I Am Legend
I like that commercial as well.

Is there something wrong with me? :confused:

No, there isn't. It's a funny commercial.