Rant
09-01-2008, 11:17 PM
Usually, I only really like writing and posting about Action and Sci-Fi flicks. This is the genre that is dear to me in my 20’s. In my teens I was all about the Comedies. Before that, as a Kid, it was the odd combination of Horror Movies and Kid‘s Animated Flicks. This list is a reminiscence of the latter.
Walt Disney’s Classics have had a long tradition of grabbing a hold of my heart strings and pulling on them to open the shades blocking my manly force field of apathy and machismo, submitting it to a tidal wave of feelings. And dammit, they are good at it. And while I’ve never cried at any of his films, I have felt like shit after certain parts and this here is my list of moments that worked so gosh golly hard at breaking my will, they succeeded where a thousand romantic comedies and heartfelt dramas have failed. So grab a box of tissues, curl under your favorite blanket and lock the gun away in the cabinet, it’s…
RANT’S TOP TEN TEAR-JERKINGLY TRAGIC DISNEY MOMENTS
*SPOILERS AND NAUGHTY LANGUAGE, YOU’VE JUST BEEN WARNED!*
NOTE: This List Sticks to The ANIMATED Classics. So Please, No Whining That ‘Old Yeller’ Should Have Been Included. Also, Please Feel Free To Post Your Own Lists and Sob Story’s, As I Think It Will Be Therapeutic To Stir The Emotional Pot As A Group. Thank You.
http://reviews.mobilewhack.com/disney_logo.jpg
10. Material Girls
- Cinderella (1950) - & - The Little Mermaid (1989) -
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/4/44/Cinderella-disney-poster.jpg
First, lets cover Cindy. Her life is shit, OK. Shit. Her father marries a bitch named Lady Tremaine, who has two ugly daughters that are also bitches. Lame. Then her father up and dies. Double Lame. Tremaine and her daughters take over the estate and turn Cindy into the house slave and treat her as though her hair were red. Triple Lame. This abuse and servitude goes on for years. One day an invitation to a ball, thrown by a handsome Prince dude, shows up at the door and Cindy begs to go. Her bitchmother agrees, under the condition that she meets conditions that she can’t possibly meet. 1. Finish her mountain of chores and 2. find a dress. Lucky for Cindy she has a cavalcade of anthropomorphic friends that undertake the second task, as she is busy busting her gorgeous ass workin’ for the man. One problem, her animal buddies used material that belonged to the stepbitch-sisters and when wearing her gown for the first time, Cindy’s step monster lets loose the hounds (her daughters) unto the dress. They tear the thing to bloody pieces and leave Cindy at home to cry as they head to the ball. Sun-oVa-BiTch that’s some cold shit.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/7/75/Movie_poster_the_little_mermaid.jpg
Second, enter Ariel. A foxy mermaid gal that happens to be obsessed with life out-from-under the sea. Seems all fine and dandy, but this is a forbidden pleasure decreed by her father in an act of keeping her from ending up trapped in a tuna net. But, Ariel is young, dumb and fulla… caviar? I dunno, but she is a sweet kid and spends her time collecting objects from the forbidden realm that is the ‘Human’ world. She keeps these objects in a hidden cave with plenty of shelf space and great acoustics. We follow her one day as she is taken there for a surprise by her buddy Flounder (unfortunately, not the chubby dude from Animal House). He just happened to get his flippers on a replica statute of her human dreamboat, that fell off the back of a ship in a storm. Note: want to find out how and why she loves this man, watch the damn movie. Anyways, her royal watchdog, who is a crab, happens to follow her this day and scuttles off to tell daddy what his babay be doin’. This-a-iza-no-good. Daddy Triton shows up and in an act of tough love uses his magic pimp-stick to blow the shit outta her entire collection, including her just-acquired chiseled (literally) beefcake. Like Cindy, Ariel is left alone to cry and hate the world for being so damn cruel. And do you know how hard it is to cry underwater? Damn.
Now I know what you must be thinking, ‘But Rant, you are so manly, why would you care if a couple girls loose their possessions? You some kind of guy that thinks about chicks feelings or something?’ Well, you got me. I get a little gooey when I see a damsel in distress. What can I say? I’m a Ballsy Hero. That, and I can sympathize. I love my possessions as much as the next nerd. Shit, if someone came into my house and blew the shit outta my DVD collection, I would cry like Nancy Kerrigan… Then, of course, I would find the asshole that did it and gut the Mother Fucker. ’Cuz I’m a man. But these ladies are not men, they are Ladies. And I can’t help that I feel for them in their time of loss.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/1/1d/Thejunglebook_movieposter.jpg
09. Hoes Before Bros
- The Jungle Book (1967) -
The story goes like this, a baby human is found in a basket in the jungle by a panther named Bagheera. He proceeds to eat the little bastard and moves on with his day. NO! He rescues the man-cub and takes him to be raised by a mother wolf who just had a litter. Skip Ahead: Ten Years Later. The boy is named Mowgli, after some lawn appliances or something, and is living happily with his jungle buddies. Sadly, news hits that a racist tiger named Shere Khan has returned to the jungle and wants a piece of Mowgli’s ripe young ass. Problem: Imminent Death. Solution: Get da fuck out the jungle. So, against the little brat’s wishes, that’s just what Bagheera intends to do. Now the tragedy begins on the route to the nearest man-village when Mowgli and Bagheera meet a big dumb bear named Baloo. Baloo is a kick-ass, care-free and fun-lovin’ dude who gives Mowgli an alternative to leaving his beloved home. The alternative? Take the ‘Bobby McFerrin' approach, Don’t Worry, Be Happy. And that is just what Mowgli decides to do.
What could be more fun? A care-free life of hanging out with your best bud in your favorite place, wasting the days away and singing bitchin’ tunes for the rest of your life. Not much. Unfortunately, some shit happens to go down that involves a kidnapping , some near-death occurrences, and an attempted homicide. And ALL OF A SUDDEN staying in the jungle turns out to be too dangerous or some bullshit and Baloo decides that Baggy was right to want to bring Mowgli back to civilization.
Now you may be asking, ‘What’s so sad about that, Rant?’ I’ll tell you. When the trio make it to the man-camp, Mowgli, who was STILL resisting this decision, gets his first glimpse of the fairer sex and it is all she wrote. He ditches his convictions and drops his buddy Baloo like a bad-habit and bee-lines for the pussy. It’s a classic case of misguided hormones dividing up a great friendship. Mowgli just couldn’t stay strong when that succubus’s deep stare clouded his mind and started him walking down that long road of emotional and psychological torture called first love. I just want to scream at the movie, ‘ NO MOWGLI! Stay With Baloo, You Don’t Want To Know That Kind Of Pain! Sure, Shere Khan Might Come Back And Tear Your Ass To Shreds, But That Is Nothing Compared To The Damage That Bitch Will Inevitably Do To Your Heart!…. But his dick is already in the drivers seat and it ain‘t pulling over for rest stops. ~sigh~ It’s sad.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/cd/One_Hundred_and_One_Dalmatians_movie_poster.jpg
08. Where My Dawgs At?
- One Hundred And One Dalmatians (1961) -
OK, so there is this dog named Pongo and he appoints himself the job of finding his master, Roger, some tang. He does in Anita, who happens to be the master of a hot little bitch named Perdy. It’s a match made in heaven and before long Pongo and Perdy do it like they do on the Discovery channel. The result, she shits out a litter of 15 puppies, and they are as adorable as can be. Enter Anita’s old friend (?) Cruella De Vil. One of the most terrifying and diabolical villains to ever grace the screen. This evil skank offers the couple a boatload of cash for the puppies, which (unknown to Roger and Anita) she intends to skin and make into a coat. Jesus Christ on Crutches. That’s some sick-ass shit. Now, Roger, being of sound mind and reason, outright refuses the sale of the puppies and tells Cruella to beat feet. The satanic bitch that she is, De Vil does not take this too well. A few weeks pass and the puppies mature and their spots begin to appear. Around this time, Cruella hires a couple of goons to kidnap the puppies. One rainy and spooky evening, when Roger, Anita, Pongo and Perdy are out for the night, they leave only the chubby maid to defend the household. Big Mistake. The bastards attack and succeed in snatching the whole litter after ruffin’ up the help. The quartet comes home to the maid screaming that ‘THEY TOOK THE PUPPIES!’ What follows is one of the saddest montages in film history. Shot after shot as the humans futiley try to locate the stolen pups while Pongo and Perdy lounge around helpless to the plight. It does such a great job in pumping your emotions up for the fight against the tyranny of Cruella that is to follow.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/8c/Foxhoundposter.jpg
07. What’s That Sharp Pain In My Back…
- The Fox And The Hound (1981) -
Like so many of Disney’s films, this one starts with an orphan. This time round it happens to be a young red fox (a literal fox, not a hot dame, bummer I know). A stereotype owl named Big Mama gets the fox adopted by a lady that owns a farm. The Hound from the title comes in when the farm lady’s neighbor (some redneck douche) brings home a new huntin’ dawg right ‘round the same time Tod (that’s the fox’s name) gets adopted. So, being around the same age, the Fox and the Hound (named Copper) become buddies and they vow to one another to be FRIENDS FOREVER. Got that, OK? Moving on.
Well, huntin’ season starts and like all rednecks, the hunter takes his dogs into the woods to go dominate lesser animals and pee on stuff, leaving Tod to twiddle his claws. Months pass, they both grow up and eventually Copper comes back home. So, like a good friend would do, Tod goes over to see his BFF and what does Copper say? Oh, guess what? “I’m a huntin’ dog now so you gotta fuck off!” To make matters worse, the other huntin’ dog wakes up and a chase ensues. Now, Copper does help Tod get away. Kind of, but the old dog is relentless and chases him onto a railroad track where his dumb ass gets hit. Now here is the real fucked up part, Copper and the Hunter BLAME Tod and swear vengeance. HUH?! What the fuck happened to FRIENDS FOREVER? The rest of the film is Copper and his douche-bag master, huntin’ down Tod to kill him. This makes my piss boil. I’d like to neuter Copper’s betraying, back stabbin’ ass. In the end, he realizes he was being a fuckass and stands up for Tod in front of the Hunter (after Tod saved them both from a bear attack) Oh, well. I guess if you save my life, I can forget about my ridiculous, not really your fault AT ALL, vendetta. What a Dick!
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/c4/Teaser1.jpg
06. The Kinslayer
- The Lion King (1994) -
The story begins with the anointment of baby Simba, (pronounced, SiM-BaaaaaH), heir to the throne of Pride Rock. Son of the mighty King Mufasa and Nephew to the king’s brother Scar. Now, Scar is having a bad day. Ya see, he was the heir before this little pussy showed up and he is none too happy about losing the right to succeed. So, while Simba is being taken on tours of his future kingdom, fucking around with his homosexual pigeon guardian and being taught the lessons of the Circle of Life, Scar is busy planning. “What‘s he planning?” you might ask (if you are one of the 3 people who have not seen this). I’ll tell you: The assassination of his brother the king and the king's son. Scar starts by filling Simba’s curious little mind with tales of the elephant graveyard, a forbidden zone filled with a legion of hyenas from the time of the Third Reich. Naturally, Simba goes there and curiosity nearly kills the cat, but he is saved at the last second by Mufasa. Scar plays it cool and starts to work out another way to trim that hard-to-reach heir.
A little time passes and Scar tries plan B. He lures Simba into a gorge, telling him his father has a surprise there waiting for him. Meanwhile his goose-stepping moron hyenas start a wildebeest stampede that funnels straight down the gorge at Simba’s naive ass. As the little cub tries to survive, Scar runs off to alert Mufasa and bring the lamb (or lion as it happens to be) to the slaughter. Mufasa races in and manages to save Simba just in time, but gets himself caught on the edge of a cliff above the rampaging deer-cow thingies. With his claws slipping, Mufasa begs for the help of his on-looking brother:
Mufasa: Scar! Brother, help me!
(Scar digs his claws into Mufasa's paws)
Scar: (Throwing him to his doom) Long live the King!
Simba: (Screaming) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
We are left to watch Mufasa fall, in horrific slow-motion, to certain death through the eye’s of his only son. ~Chills~ But it gets worse. As the dust of the stampede clears, a searching Simba finds the body of his heroic father, broken and lifeless. Before he has a moment to think, Scar appears and convinces traumatized Simba, that not only is Mufasa’s death his fault, but that he will be forsaken when the other lions find out what he did. Terrified, Simba starts to run and doesn’t stop running for years to come.
Do I even need to point out how tragic this shit is? How many tears of small children, and adults alike did this scene spill? Enough to fill a savannah? I don’t know, a lot would be a good guess though. I am proud to say that at 9 years old, I held strong… barely. This shit was epic.
...to be continued
Walt Disney’s Classics have had a long tradition of grabbing a hold of my heart strings and pulling on them to open the shades blocking my manly force field of apathy and machismo, submitting it to a tidal wave of feelings. And dammit, they are good at it. And while I’ve never cried at any of his films, I have felt like shit after certain parts and this here is my list of moments that worked so gosh golly hard at breaking my will, they succeeded where a thousand romantic comedies and heartfelt dramas have failed. So grab a box of tissues, curl under your favorite blanket and lock the gun away in the cabinet, it’s…
RANT’S TOP TEN TEAR-JERKINGLY TRAGIC DISNEY MOMENTS
*SPOILERS AND NAUGHTY LANGUAGE, YOU’VE JUST BEEN WARNED!*
NOTE: This List Sticks to The ANIMATED Classics. So Please, No Whining That ‘Old Yeller’ Should Have Been Included. Also, Please Feel Free To Post Your Own Lists and Sob Story’s, As I Think It Will Be Therapeutic To Stir The Emotional Pot As A Group. Thank You.
http://reviews.mobilewhack.com/disney_logo.jpg
10. Material Girls
- Cinderella (1950) - & - The Little Mermaid (1989) -
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/4/44/Cinderella-disney-poster.jpg
First, lets cover Cindy. Her life is shit, OK. Shit. Her father marries a bitch named Lady Tremaine, who has two ugly daughters that are also bitches. Lame. Then her father up and dies. Double Lame. Tremaine and her daughters take over the estate and turn Cindy into the house slave and treat her as though her hair were red. Triple Lame. This abuse and servitude goes on for years. One day an invitation to a ball, thrown by a handsome Prince dude, shows up at the door and Cindy begs to go. Her bitchmother agrees, under the condition that she meets conditions that she can’t possibly meet. 1. Finish her mountain of chores and 2. find a dress. Lucky for Cindy she has a cavalcade of anthropomorphic friends that undertake the second task, as she is busy busting her gorgeous ass workin’ for the man. One problem, her animal buddies used material that belonged to the stepbitch-sisters and when wearing her gown for the first time, Cindy’s step monster lets loose the hounds (her daughters) unto the dress. They tear the thing to bloody pieces and leave Cindy at home to cry as they head to the ball. Sun-oVa-BiTch that’s some cold shit.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/7/75/Movie_poster_the_little_mermaid.jpg
Second, enter Ariel. A foxy mermaid gal that happens to be obsessed with life out-from-under the sea. Seems all fine and dandy, but this is a forbidden pleasure decreed by her father in an act of keeping her from ending up trapped in a tuna net. But, Ariel is young, dumb and fulla… caviar? I dunno, but she is a sweet kid and spends her time collecting objects from the forbidden realm that is the ‘Human’ world. She keeps these objects in a hidden cave with plenty of shelf space and great acoustics. We follow her one day as she is taken there for a surprise by her buddy Flounder (unfortunately, not the chubby dude from Animal House). He just happened to get his flippers on a replica statute of her human dreamboat, that fell off the back of a ship in a storm. Note: want to find out how and why she loves this man, watch the damn movie. Anyways, her royal watchdog, who is a crab, happens to follow her this day and scuttles off to tell daddy what his babay be doin’. This-a-iza-no-good. Daddy Triton shows up and in an act of tough love uses his magic pimp-stick to blow the shit outta her entire collection, including her just-acquired chiseled (literally) beefcake. Like Cindy, Ariel is left alone to cry and hate the world for being so damn cruel. And do you know how hard it is to cry underwater? Damn.
Now I know what you must be thinking, ‘But Rant, you are so manly, why would you care if a couple girls loose their possessions? You some kind of guy that thinks about chicks feelings or something?’ Well, you got me. I get a little gooey when I see a damsel in distress. What can I say? I’m a Ballsy Hero. That, and I can sympathize. I love my possessions as much as the next nerd. Shit, if someone came into my house and blew the shit outta my DVD collection, I would cry like Nancy Kerrigan… Then, of course, I would find the asshole that did it and gut the Mother Fucker. ’Cuz I’m a man. But these ladies are not men, they are Ladies. And I can’t help that I feel for them in their time of loss.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/1/1d/Thejunglebook_movieposter.jpg
09. Hoes Before Bros
- The Jungle Book (1967) -
The story goes like this, a baby human is found in a basket in the jungle by a panther named Bagheera. He proceeds to eat the little bastard and moves on with his day. NO! He rescues the man-cub and takes him to be raised by a mother wolf who just had a litter. Skip Ahead: Ten Years Later. The boy is named Mowgli, after some lawn appliances or something, and is living happily with his jungle buddies. Sadly, news hits that a racist tiger named Shere Khan has returned to the jungle and wants a piece of Mowgli’s ripe young ass. Problem: Imminent Death. Solution: Get da fuck out the jungle. So, against the little brat’s wishes, that’s just what Bagheera intends to do. Now the tragedy begins on the route to the nearest man-village when Mowgli and Bagheera meet a big dumb bear named Baloo. Baloo is a kick-ass, care-free and fun-lovin’ dude who gives Mowgli an alternative to leaving his beloved home. The alternative? Take the ‘Bobby McFerrin' approach, Don’t Worry, Be Happy. And that is just what Mowgli decides to do.
What could be more fun? A care-free life of hanging out with your best bud in your favorite place, wasting the days away and singing bitchin’ tunes for the rest of your life. Not much. Unfortunately, some shit happens to go down that involves a kidnapping , some near-death occurrences, and an attempted homicide. And ALL OF A SUDDEN staying in the jungle turns out to be too dangerous or some bullshit and Baloo decides that Baggy was right to want to bring Mowgli back to civilization.
Now you may be asking, ‘What’s so sad about that, Rant?’ I’ll tell you. When the trio make it to the man-camp, Mowgli, who was STILL resisting this decision, gets his first glimpse of the fairer sex and it is all she wrote. He ditches his convictions and drops his buddy Baloo like a bad-habit and bee-lines for the pussy. It’s a classic case of misguided hormones dividing up a great friendship. Mowgli just couldn’t stay strong when that succubus’s deep stare clouded his mind and started him walking down that long road of emotional and psychological torture called first love. I just want to scream at the movie, ‘ NO MOWGLI! Stay With Baloo, You Don’t Want To Know That Kind Of Pain! Sure, Shere Khan Might Come Back And Tear Your Ass To Shreds, But That Is Nothing Compared To The Damage That Bitch Will Inevitably Do To Your Heart!…. But his dick is already in the drivers seat and it ain‘t pulling over for rest stops. ~sigh~ It’s sad.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/cd/One_Hundred_and_One_Dalmatians_movie_poster.jpg
08. Where My Dawgs At?
- One Hundred And One Dalmatians (1961) -
OK, so there is this dog named Pongo and he appoints himself the job of finding his master, Roger, some tang. He does in Anita, who happens to be the master of a hot little bitch named Perdy. It’s a match made in heaven and before long Pongo and Perdy do it like they do on the Discovery channel. The result, she shits out a litter of 15 puppies, and they are as adorable as can be. Enter Anita’s old friend (?) Cruella De Vil. One of the most terrifying and diabolical villains to ever grace the screen. This evil skank offers the couple a boatload of cash for the puppies, which (unknown to Roger and Anita) she intends to skin and make into a coat. Jesus Christ on Crutches. That’s some sick-ass shit. Now, Roger, being of sound mind and reason, outright refuses the sale of the puppies and tells Cruella to beat feet. The satanic bitch that she is, De Vil does not take this too well. A few weeks pass and the puppies mature and their spots begin to appear. Around this time, Cruella hires a couple of goons to kidnap the puppies. One rainy and spooky evening, when Roger, Anita, Pongo and Perdy are out for the night, they leave only the chubby maid to defend the household. Big Mistake. The bastards attack and succeed in snatching the whole litter after ruffin’ up the help. The quartet comes home to the maid screaming that ‘THEY TOOK THE PUPPIES!’ What follows is one of the saddest montages in film history. Shot after shot as the humans futiley try to locate the stolen pups while Pongo and Perdy lounge around helpless to the plight. It does such a great job in pumping your emotions up for the fight against the tyranny of Cruella that is to follow.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/8c/Foxhoundposter.jpg
07. What’s That Sharp Pain In My Back…
- The Fox And The Hound (1981) -
Like so many of Disney’s films, this one starts with an orphan. This time round it happens to be a young red fox (a literal fox, not a hot dame, bummer I know). A stereotype owl named Big Mama gets the fox adopted by a lady that owns a farm. The Hound from the title comes in when the farm lady’s neighbor (some redneck douche) brings home a new huntin’ dawg right ‘round the same time Tod (that’s the fox’s name) gets adopted. So, being around the same age, the Fox and the Hound (named Copper) become buddies and they vow to one another to be FRIENDS FOREVER. Got that, OK? Moving on.
Well, huntin’ season starts and like all rednecks, the hunter takes his dogs into the woods to go dominate lesser animals and pee on stuff, leaving Tod to twiddle his claws. Months pass, they both grow up and eventually Copper comes back home. So, like a good friend would do, Tod goes over to see his BFF and what does Copper say? Oh, guess what? “I’m a huntin’ dog now so you gotta fuck off!” To make matters worse, the other huntin’ dog wakes up and a chase ensues. Now, Copper does help Tod get away. Kind of, but the old dog is relentless and chases him onto a railroad track where his dumb ass gets hit. Now here is the real fucked up part, Copper and the Hunter BLAME Tod and swear vengeance. HUH?! What the fuck happened to FRIENDS FOREVER? The rest of the film is Copper and his douche-bag master, huntin’ down Tod to kill him. This makes my piss boil. I’d like to neuter Copper’s betraying, back stabbin’ ass. In the end, he realizes he was being a fuckass and stands up for Tod in front of the Hunter (after Tod saved them both from a bear attack) Oh, well. I guess if you save my life, I can forget about my ridiculous, not really your fault AT ALL, vendetta. What a Dick!
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/c4/Teaser1.jpg
06. The Kinslayer
- The Lion King (1994) -
The story begins with the anointment of baby Simba, (pronounced, SiM-BaaaaaH), heir to the throne of Pride Rock. Son of the mighty King Mufasa and Nephew to the king’s brother Scar. Now, Scar is having a bad day. Ya see, he was the heir before this little pussy showed up and he is none too happy about losing the right to succeed. So, while Simba is being taken on tours of his future kingdom, fucking around with his homosexual pigeon guardian and being taught the lessons of the Circle of Life, Scar is busy planning. “What‘s he planning?” you might ask (if you are one of the 3 people who have not seen this). I’ll tell you: The assassination of his brother the king and the king's son. Scar starts by filling Simba’s curious little mind with tales of the elephant graveyard, a forbidden zone filled with a legion of hyenas from the time of the Third Reich. Naturally, Simba goes there and curiosity nearly kills the cat, but he is saved at the last second by Mufasa. Scar plays it cool and starts to work out another way to trim that hard-to-reach heir.
A little time passes and Scar tries plan B. He lures Simba into a gorge, telling him his father has a surprise there waiting for him. Meanwhile his goose-stepping moron hyenas start a wildebeest stampede that funnels straight down the gorge at Simba’s naive ass. As the little cub tries to survive, Scar runs off to alert Mufasa and bring the lamb (or lion as it happens to be) to the slaughter. Mufasa races in and manages to save Simba just in time, but gets himself caught on the edge of a cliff above the rampaging deer-cow thingies. With his claws slipping, Mufasa begs for the help of his on-looking brother:
Mufasa: Scar! Brother, help me!
(Scar digs his claws into Mufasa's paws)
Scar: (Throwing him to his doom) Long live the King!
Simba: (Screaming) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
We are left to watch Mufasa fall, in horrific slow-motion, to certain death through the eye’s of his only son. ~Chills~ But it gets worse. As the dust of the stampede clears, a searching Simba finds the body of his heroic father, broken and lifeless. Before he has a moment to think, Scar appears and convinces traumatized Simba, that not only is Mufasa’s death his fault, but that he will be forsaken when the other lions find out what he did. Terrified, Simba starts to run and doesn’t stop running for years to come.
Do I even need to point out how tragic this shit is? How many tears of small children, and adults alike did this scene spill? Enough to fill a savannah? I don’t know, a lot would be a good guess though. I am proud to say that at 9 years old, I held strong… barely. This shit was epic.
...to be continued