Hearing your neighbors have sex [Archive] - Movie Fan Central Discussion Forums

Badbird

07-19-2009, 02:24 AM

Okay, so a couple months ago this young couple moved into the apartment above me. Now, I wouldn't say my apartments are really that bad when it comes to being sound proof - it usually isn't an issue at all.

However, every few days I can hear them just banging away. Seriously, it's almost like a joke. Like when you see a scene in a movie where someone is in some shitty hotel and the people next door have really loud sex as a joke... but it's really like that!

This chick is all like "OH GOD! OH YES!!!" It's like they're shooting a porno... come to think of it, maybe they are. Or at least a webcam stream. They were just up there for the past ten minutes putting on a show.

I've never dated anyone who was a screamer, but I imagine it would get annoying since she would be screaming right in your ear the whole time.

outsyder

07-19-2009, 02:27 AM

The next logical step is to bang on the roof with a broom and say "keep it down up there!"

If they are in fact shooting a porno, they may invite you up.

God of War

07-19-2009, 02:31 AM

http://allearsinfo.com/images/earplug_for_team_org._11-11_006.jpg

OR...

http://www.hungrylizardstudio.com/art3d/images/Gatling%20Shotgun.jpg

john_rambo

07-19-2009, 02:45 AM

http://www.seb.cc/peephole/wood.gif

+

http://www.uvprocess.com/products%5CSAFETY%20PRODUCTS.A1.SKIN%20CARE%20PROD UCTS.SKINCARE%5CUV%20SKIN%20LOTION.SKINCARE%20K%5C SKINCARE%20K_I002001hand_WebPic1.JPG

It'll be like your nailing the chick yourself

john_rambo

07-19-2009, 02:49 AM

Oh and while you're at it scream really loud while you are doing my suggestion.

adamjohnson

07-19-2009, 02:53 AM

It usually turns me on.

The enxt best choice is to bang on the ceiling REALLY HARD and mess up their rhthym.

Tweek

07-19-2009, 03:57 AM

I've lived places where I had to hear that. So annoying. Luckily this building has better sound-proofing and shit.

God of War

07-19-2009, 04:15 AM

The enxt best choice is to bang on the ceiling REALLY HARD and mess up their rhthym.

Or, alternatively, just bang the ceiling REALLY HARD and mess it up :p

KcMsterpce

07-19-2009, 07:01 AM

That's kinda funny, just yesterday afternoon coming home from work I heard a chick upstairs making noises that told me she was either in some kind of moaning pain, or... but probably not.

Then this thread comes up. Hmmm...

God of War

07-19-2009, 07:06 AM

That's not all that came up. See the first part of Adam's last post :p

BadCoverVersion

07-19-2009, 07:29 AM

My neighbours are gay men...and they are discreet. Their house is so classy and immaculate that I doubt they have actual sex there anyway...they probably book into cheap hotels to get their kicks.

I think girls who make too much fuss of it are clearly overcompensating.

ilovemovies

07-19-2009, 08:07 AM

I would love for that to happen to me! :D

Although if it happens a lot then it might get old and as long as I'm not trying to concentrate on something or else that could be really distracting. Like this one time I went to the movies, I was totally distracted by this couple sitting behind me. I don't know for sure if they were having sex because I didn't turn around to see, but I definitely got the feeling that they were. :D

jackson13

07-19-2009, 09:56 AM

Just do it back to them. You dont actually have to have sex (though that would be nice for anyone), just do it enough to creep them out. You say shes a screamer and a moaner, join right in. You hear "OH! OH GOD!" from her, instantly yell out "OH! OH GOD!" right back. Copy every sound she makes, except do it even louder. Open a window if you have to. Soon enough they'll get sick of the guy downstairs joining in and stop, or, at the least, she'll shut up.

The Postmaster General

07-19-2009, 11:53 AM

At least you aren't hearing them argue. I had some neighbors would would argue, and I used to always shut them up by loudly commentating on their arguments Waldorf and Statler-style. The only thing I specifically remember was once the guy screaming back at me, "SHUT UP!" and me screaming back, "ME OR HER!?"

BakeTheMooCow

07-19-2009, 12:05 PM

Natty

07-19-2009, 12:18 PM

^^^^^^

Oh man that scene is hilarious!! :D

Anyway, I would go with Jackson's advice.

Heisenberg

07-19-2009, 12:26 PM

I'm reminded of a scene from Frasier

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gllL7QsxQIk

(5:10 into the clip)

Great scene, great episode.

jolanar

07-19-2009, 12:32 PM

I think girls who make too much fuss of it are clearly overcompensating.

Definitely agree there. I think some girls are just scarred from porn. They think they have to yell to do their part, and if they don't the guy will be upset or something. Real sex rarely goes beyond heavy breathing and moaning. Saying any words just feels unnatural and takes you out of the moment.

echo_bravo

07-19-2009, 01:31 PM

During my senior year in college, my roommate brought home a chick and my roommate was the one making all the noise...not her haha.

She was quiet as a mouse and he was moaning all sorts of shit it was hilarious and ridiculously awkward at the same time. "Damn babygirl, you like that babygirl. Damn babygirl!! Oh shit babygirl!"

QUENTIN

07-19-2009, 01:59 PM

Sorry, we'll try to keep it down.

ilovemovies

07-19-2009, 02:15 PM

Sorry, we'll keep it down from now on.

Gotta say, I'm surprised it took this long for somebody to make this joke now that I think about it.

g1ng3rsnap9ed

07-19-2009, 06:00 PM

Sorry, we'll try to keep it down.
Yes, we will. ;)

RicochetShaw

07-19-2009, 10:43 PM

My senior year in university I lived in a two-story, 3-bedroom townhome with two other guys. They were pretty dedicated pre-med students, so they were quiet for the most part, but the roommate who lived above me and his girlfriend would get pretty loud once in a while. It was never too bad, or worthy of complaining, but things were compounded by the fact that it was a pretty old townhome and I was directly below.

The thing that really got out of hand was when my roommate would let his younger brother, a freshman, bring his girlfriend over and use their room like a cheap hotel (as opposed to the freshman dorms... which would be awkard considering everyone shared a room). One time in particular it was just absurd. The girl would not stop screaming at the top of her lungs for literally over an hour. I stepped out of my room in annoyance, and at that moment, my other roommate, who's probably the most chill dude ever, did the same. Seriously, I've never seen this guy upset or irritated in the four years I'd known him, but she was so loud that we exchanged glances of annoyance, and just kind of stood there dumbfounded for a while, she just kept going and going, and seemingly got louder with every yell. I felt like I was living in a seedy motel, but I guess the guy was skilled.

The Postmaster General

07-21-2009, 02:07 AM

Frosty_86

07-21-2009, 10:45 PM

Believe it or not Ive seen my neighbors across the street just fuckin goin at it one night. They live right across from me and I was comeing home and their blinds were wide open with the lights on and it I was just thinking thats pretty fuckin odd at 130 on a Tuesday. I look over and they are just goin at it, he was really given it to her. It was one the weirdest experiences in my life. Although the chick is really hot, shes had two kids but damn. Shes a 8.5 easily.

One time I was chillin outside with my a buddy of mine, smoking a few cigarettes enjoying a few beers in my back yard and I hear the people that live behind me fucking in their pool, of course they had a privacy fence. The water was splashing all over the place, and theyre both kind of big so I wonder if there was even water left after they were done. The guy was makin some weird noises too.

Sgizzy316

07-22-2009, 01:46 AM

I live in a three story townhouse where I have the top loft and my roommate has the two bedrooms on the second floor (one bedroom and one office). It's almost a competition at this point as to who could get a girl to make the most noise. :D

Natty

07-22-2009, 06:06 AM

Believe it or not Ive seen my neighbors across the street just fuckin goin at it one night. They live right across from me and I was comeing home and their blinds were wide open with the lights on and it I was just thinking thats pretty fuckin odd at 130 on a Tuesday.

A similar thing has actually happened to me. It was about 9 or 10 at night so totally dark outside but for some reason the couple who live opposite me decided to open the blinds, with the light on and the wife gave her guy a blowjob. They are both middle-aged and were both nude, there wasn't really any passion in the act so it was quite a sleazy affair.

The wife isn't really hot but isn't especially fat or ugly either...huge arse though.

poopontheshoes7

07-23-2009, 06:47 PM

I was about 13 and sleeping over my friends house one night during the summer. He lived next door to a young couple. The girl was this insanely beautiful Asian girl and me and my friend would google at her any chance we got. What was great though, my friends bedroom window was RIGHT across from their bedroom window...

That night was something right out of an 80's teen film. Its was about 10PM and we were playing video games. I get up to go get a soda (Dr. Pepper. I remember:D) and I happen to see her walk into her room with nothing but a dark red towel on. She had clearly just gotten out of shower. I instantly got excited (not that excited you pervs) and I taped my friend on the shoulder telling him to get up. He gets up and starts freaking out. We didn't want her to see us gawking at her so we closed the blinds and peered out through the slits. We were waited with bated breath for her to drop her towel. It seemed like it would NEVER happen. I figured she would just get dress in another part of the house. No way we would get that lucky...

Then she does it. She drops the towel. Oh lordy...my friend let out a rather loud squeal and I high-fived him. She was stark naked and perfect looking. I mean perfect. We saw everything. I still remember it to this day. She had perfectly round and perky breasts, smooth thighs, tight ass and even a nicely trimmed woowoo.
She then put on some disappointingly modest PJ's and left the room. My friend and I were jumping up and down with excitement. It was the first nude girl we had ever seen (in person). He literally said "This is the best night of my life!"

Oh the memories...;)

Abbie Normal

07-23-2009, 07:28 PM

Okay, so a couple months ago this young couple moved into the apartment above me. Now, I wouldn't say my apartments are really that bad when it comes to being sound proof - it usually isn't an issue at all..

OK this is too good not to ask questions. Please indulge me.

1. Do you live alone or have gf or wife?
2. Do you know what each other look like and do they know you live below them?
3. Would you bang her?
4. Do you think they are doing it to get you to come on up and knock on the door and maybe join in?
5. Are you on speaking terms with either of them?

That is I have for now. Based on your answers I will probably ask more questions.

I once dated a girl who turned out to be a screamer in bed. It was really fucking annoying after the 3rd or 4th time. I could not concentrate at all. She knew she was loud and would put a pillow over her face or go face down during doggie. I wish I could say it was because of me, but that is a lie. She is some sort of freak in this regard. It turned out to be a nice excuse why I did not think we were compatible. A few months later, she emailed me asking if I wanted to join her and some guy she was seeing. I guess he figured if she mouth was busy she would not be as loud. Wouldn't you know it, she was. Go figure. I think I could she became some third rate porn star. The most annoying part about having sex with her was she came a normal amount of times for a girl who screamed like she was having an orgasm for like an hour at a time.

g1ng3rsnap9ed

07-23-2009, 07:30 PM

Badbird

07-24-2009, 01:16 AM

OK this is too good not to ask questions. Please indulge me.

1. Do you live alone or have gf or wife?
2. Do you know what each other look like and do they know you live below them?
3. Would you bang her?
4. Do you think they are doing it to get you to come on up and knock on the door and maybe join in?
5. Are you on speaking terms with either of them?

1 - I live alone.
2 - I think I saw them for the first time last week. Both look to be about mid-twenties.
3 - She's cute, I guess (if who I saw is her).
4 - Uh, no.
5 - Never spoke to them. Never crossed paths.

FLAME_ON

07-24-2009, 02:04 AM

Anyone ever have someone go at it in the same room as you? Like in a dorm, or something? Like, you wake up and look over and they have a visitor, so instead of getting up to pee, you have to lay there quietly until they fall asleep?

Yeah, my second year in the dorms (both years with the same roommate) and my roomie ended up getting a serious girlfriend who would sleep over 3-4 nights a week. I was okay with it because I imagined if I had a serious gal in the dorms, I'd want her to sleep over once and a while.
Anyways, besides her growing attachment to our room and the inappropriateness of me going to and coming back from the shower as she sat on our futon facing me, they started to quietly get it on at night.
They didn't full out hump or ravage each other but I could distinctly hear swishes and swashes of bodily fluids--other than the understandable sounds of making out.
SO yeah, I would go to bed at night to the sounds of a penis churning. I'm a particularly perverted person but it just didn't work for me.
That lasted two weeks (after 3 months of her staying over--where I'm guessing at that point they figured they could get away with it if they were quiet enough), and at that point I told him we need to work it out where you go to her pad more often, I sleep in our neighbor's room if you want to fuck, or it stops all together... A mix of the three happened.

Canto

07-24-2009, 02:32 AM

Frosty_86

07-24-2009, 11:11 AM

I remember a few years ago there was a couple, a short buff dude and a tall amazon like blonde woman who lived on my friends' street. We would be outside down the street and we could hear them doing it from about 5 houses down. We were just kids so we thought it was hilarious.

Im just imagining how that looks. How tall and how short we talkin here? Was the guy freakishly short (like 5 feet) and she freakishly tall ( like 6'5"), now that would be a site to see I would think about paying to see that.

Abbie Normal

07-24-2009, 05:37 PM

1 - I live alone.
2 - I think I saw them for the first time last week. Both look to be about mid-twenties.
3 - She's cute, I guess (if who I saw is her).
4 - Uh, no.
5 - Never spoke to them. Never crossed paths.

If I were you, I would make an effort to see when the guy is home alone and seek him out. I would explain what is happening and make a joke of it saying something like it helped you bang a lady you were entertaining and she you two heard those two having sex. Then see what he says. You have nothing to lose. It is not like he is going to punch you in the face. He might let you watch if you can hear it already. He might let you join in.

....But that would be me.

If they wanted you to join in, would you?

g1ng3rsnap9ed

07-24-2009, 05:40 PM

Stop probing, Abbie.

PS: Every time I see your Avatar now I imagine Barrack Obama sitting down at the computer typing up your messages. :p

Spice

07-26-2009, 10:18 PM

When I first came to Japan in 2003/04 to study at Uni here, I stayed in a tiny apartment with paper thin walls. You could hear everything that was going on from the rooms either side. Most of the other occupants were students too, so sometimes you could hear a bit of music, pots clattering, even couging. After Christmas a new guy moved in next door and although I never heard him have sex, I can honestly say that he was the masturbation king! Sometimes 5 or six times a night, during the morning, lunchtime, it was fairly random. At first it was quite funny, but then after a while it got quite embarrassing. Friends would come around and he would be in there on full throttle, shouting his head off. Worst time though was when I was ill in bed. I hadn't been into Uni for a few days and couldnt call because I didnt have a phone. My Japanese Language lecturer came around to see if was alright, (she was Japanese, very straight and very religious), I invite her in for a cup of tea and then off he goes, I have never seen such a look of shock, at one point I thought she was going to cry!

KcMsterpce

07-26-2009, 10:33 PM

I think at least once in a hotel room I was in years ago my lady was making tons of noise enough for people nearby to hear. I was a little embarrassed about that, but what can I say I was younger then.
These days I'd do anything to have a woman to make noise with me. Instead, I'm blasting my speakers to drown out the smack-smacking of my loneliness.

Abbie Normal

07-26-2009, 11:23 PM

Stop probing, Abbie.

PS: Every time I see your Avatar now I imagine Barrack Obama sitting down at the computer typing up your messages. :p

Let me have my fun. Threesomes are like gravity. All you need is a little push. :D

Sorry about the avatar. I will go back when the health care bill and cap and trade go down. I assure you President Obama is much to busy to think about the crap that I write about, less for keeping our joblo friends (you) in one piece and healthy. Be well.

Last year, I was in Pattaya Thailand, which is like a major tourist depot for many American GIs and Euro trash. Lots of fun stuff to do and not all of it is with hookers. Anyway, this guy next to my room was banging this hooker on his balcony. Me being me looked. Watched. Our balconies are connected less for a rail. Then I noticed she was a he. Gross. I was so grossed out I had to take a shower. Never saw the guy again. I did visit right near where The Beach was filmed.

Badbird

07-27-2009, 12:24 AM

If they wanted you to join in, would you?

I don't think my girlfriend would be too keen on that.

By the way, they're doing it again right now.

shoe1985

07-27-2009, 01:06 PM

A friend of mine had this neighbor, well this neighbor was dating this one chick, my friend said she was gross. Well, I guess in the middle of the night his neighbor and his woman came home, and started having sex in his car. Now this is in the middle of our town, houses everywhere. Well, I guess she was screaming like crazy. Her screaming woke up the neighbors, and my friend said he looked out her window and could see her hand on the window, moving all around.

Then another night, the couple were in their apartment, and he was banging her close to the window. Woke up all the neighbors again. I guess you could walk up the sidewalks and just look in the window and see them going at it. Be a short distance away and hear them. They moved away.

Then another friend of mine went to Philly for med school, and he said that the first week he moved in, he heard this woman moaning like crazy. Then, it happened more and more. So, he took a broom, and started hitting the top of his apartment to make a point. It happened again, so, he went and turned on some porn, turned it up as loud as he could. They finally stopped, and moved out.

I guess they don't like the porn being louder than they are.

Myself, I have not had anything happen yet.

Abbie Normal

07-27-2009, 01:28 PM

I don't think my girlfriend would be too keen on that.

By the way, they're doing it again right now.

Well, there went that idea. I would still ask if you and gf could get visual to go along with the audio of their love making. Some couples are turned on by watching another couple do it.

Ever see Michael J Fox's Secret To My Success?

Dom Shady

07-27-2009, 04:39 PM

"Damn babygirl, you like that babygirl. Damn babygirl!! Oh shit babygirl!"

That made me laugh a lot.

Dom Shady

07-27-2009, 04:52 PM

Well, there went that idea. I would still ask if you and gf could get visual to go along with the audio of their love making. Some couples are turned on by watching another couple do it.

Ever see Michael J Fox's Secret To My Success?

or get the girlfriend to join too

starcat

07-27-2009, 05:13 PM

Once, it was so awesome. Made me grab my girl and go upstairs... unfortunately it was a lot shorter and a whole lot quieter.

corran horn

07-30-2009, 11:23 AM

This has only happened once to me, and it happened last fall/winter. I'm trying to sleep, and I hear what sounds like someone jumping up and down in the apartment bedroom above my own. Then I hear a girl moaning, "Oh, oh, ow, ow!" Since that time, I would get up and use my Swiffer mop to bang on the ceiling, but that idea had not yet occurred to me. All I did was turn up the volume on my Sound Soother.

enver

08-01-2009, 02:23 PM

http://s431.photobucket.com/albums/qq39/Apemaster/robo_fap.gif

darchangel

08-01-2009, 04:17 PM