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View Full Version : Star Wars: Episode II Plot Leak


ANTBond007
08-09-2000, 04:23 PM
In a story sure to shock the foundation of entertainment, George Lucas' original treatment for the second chapter in the Star Wars saga has hit the internet.

Star Wars: Episode II: Advantages of the Force features young Anakin Skywalker finding his lot in life with his Jedi Master, Obi-Wan Kenobi.

After failing the trials to become a Jedi Knight at age 18, young Anakin leaves Obi-Wan and becomes an outcast. Upon traveling through the galaxy, he comes upon the planet Mandalore.

Mandalore is a beautiful planet. Lush jungles. Grand cities. A strong military. But at night, the planet becomes a giant club; one of casinos and prostitution.

Realizing that he is the goods, young Anakin applies to star in the porn film "A Jedi's Nights". After hours of auditioning and a screentest with star Oiyla Laarsa, Anakin gets the main part.

Rehearsing takes days of vigorous training with "stunt coordinator" Boba Fett, but soon they are ready to shoot.

Anakin films several "adventurous" scenes, and the film is nearly complete; save for the climax. Filming the "giant scene" is to be done in Mos Espa on Tatooine.

After landing on the planet, Anakin remembers his past and goes to free his mother. He does, but the Mandalores are enraged that he left their set. Anakin wins a battle against them, but he discovered their beauty secret; cloning of models.

Hoping to destroy Anakin's porno career, as well as trying to save face that Anakin WALKED off of the set, Boba Fett offically fires Anakin.

Angered that this may hurt his reputation, Anakin hurries to Coruscant with his mother. There he tells the Jedi of the underground porn industry and of the cloning. After gaining permission from Supreme Chancellor Palpatine, the Jedi declare war on the Mandalores and the clones.

Months later, one lonely night on Naboo, young Queen Amidala is bored. Looking for a little "self action", she turns on her television to the "PlayGirl Galactic Network". There they are playing an edited version of "A Jedi's Nights", with a stunt double for the final scene.

Turned on by Anakin's "performance", Amidala calls for him to Naboo. As he arrives, they are immediately married; much to the distress of Shmi. And so ends Star Wars: Episode II: Advantages of the Force.

HarryLloyd96
08-24-2000, 07:18 PM
There has to be something going on between Anekin and Queen Amidala. Also, I kind of want Darth Mal to come back in the clone wars which are predicted to happen.

Tuukka
08-27-2000, 02:15 AM
Well, that storyline was for sure ten times better than the one in episode one...

darkblue
09-09-2000, 07:50 PM
they are re-releasing the star wars trilogy on video on november 21. there will be a 10 minute peek at the making of episode 2 on the videos....a clever reason for fans to purchase the trilogy..again

stefanb
09-27-2000, 12:45 PM
For starters, ANTBond007, I don't know if you stole that or made it up yourself, but that's just hilarious. /ubb/smile.gif

Aside from that, yes, Episode 2 ~IS~ supposed to focus around the clone wars, but DARTH MAUL (spelling?) WILL NOT BE BACK IN THE CLONE WARS. That's according to Lucas himself. It's one of the few things he's said about the movie.

As for Lucas re-releasing the first three, the idiot's just milking a dead cow now. This is stupid!! How many times do we need an "all new release" of the same movies?? After he's raped everyone on the VHS copies of every movie, then we'll get to pay all over again for DVD copies. I am refusing to buy any star wars movie until the DVD release which Lucas continually says has zero chance of happening until 2006. However, I'm not paying him 17 times for the same damn movies, so I guess I'll wait.

[This message has been edited by stefanb (edited 09-27-2000).]

roann
09-27-2000, 02:57 PM
Ahhh, space-porn.

The only thing that was left unmentioned was Jar-Jar's role. I'm curious, is he going to be the new Ron Jeremy?

doctor drew
09-27-2000, 07:20 PM
yeeeeeeeeeeesh. Ron Jeremy? (shudders)

God, I hope not. I wouldn't want to see his "lightsaber" either, if you catch my drift.

When you think about it, space is one of the few unexplored frontiers in porn. Think about it. I'm going to go back to my psych assignment now before I embarass myself.

roann
09-28-2000, 04:09 PM
Yeah, it makes me shudder, too, Doc.

I've had the unfortunate experience of seeing a Ron Jeremy porn flick (why oh why, are the guys so ugly?) and it ranked equal to seeing Jar-Jar Binks as one of the worst cinematic experiences of my life.

Lightsaber? Yikes!


[This message has been edited by roann (edited 09-28-2000).]