PDA

View Full Version : Greatest Horror One-Liners


FeydRautha
11-17-2001, 06:59 PM
Have you ever been watching a flick and someone utters a line that makes you burst out laughing? Does anyone have any true favourites? I'm not talking about the famous one-liners like "A boy's best friend is his mother", just something that's said in a film that nearly made you do a spit-take with your beer.

I'll get the ball rolling:

1. FUCK Martha Stewart! Martha Stewart can kiss my shiny plastic butt!! - Tiffany, Bride of Chucky

2. This...is my BOOM-STICK!!! - Ash, Army of Darkness

3. Did IQs suddenly drop while I was away?? - Ripley, Aliens

4. Is this camera loaded? Coz I sure am!! - Cary Elwes as the drunken DoP, Shadow of the Vampire

5. Welcome to Prime Time, BITCH!! - Freddy, NOES 3

Anyone else?

mattjk_17
11-18-2001, 09:34 AM
"Groovy!" - Ash, ED2

izombie
11-19-2001, 10:11 AM
"Who do I have to fuck to get off this boat?
" - Ripley Alien 4

"Good, Bad, I'm the Guy with the Gun!" - Ash Army of Darkness

"You ain't leading but two things right now: Jack and Shit. And Jack just left town." - Ash Army of Darkness

"Pole smokin fashion victim..." - Jack Crow Vampires

SAI
11-19-2001, 12:35 PM
The best/worst line is from Vampires

He'll be completely unstoppable. Unless we stop him

[This message has been edited by SAI (edited 11-19-2001).]

Gore 4 All
11-19-2001, 06:28 PM
Party's Over!- Lionel from Dead Alive

When there's no room left in hell, the dead will walk the Earth- tagline and spoken dialouge in Dawn of the Dead

....and my personal fav

Brains! Brains! Brains! - Speaking??? zombies from Return of the Living Dead

Emo
11-19-2001, 06:29 PM
Take it from me, honey, plastic is no substitute for a nice hunk of wood."

FeydRautha
11-19-2001, 07:25 PM
Not quite horror, but:

"Her lips were warm, and my arm wasn't the only thing that was throbbing." - Steve Martin, Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid

countchocula
11-19-2001, 07:32 PM
"I can touch any object and listen to the sound of its color."-Brain Damage

ParileseMonster
11-19-2001, 07:37 PM
"That's Like Pouring Perfume on a Pig"
"You look like your head fell in the cheese dip back in 1957"
~ They Live

pedro
11-19-2001, 08:14 PM
Predator - "If it Bleeds, we can kill it"

Jason Voorhees
11-20-2001, 04:36 AM
''I knew this shit would happen! I just thought it would be over by now'' Redneck zombies, Its said by this dude named Bob. I always laugh at this because there is no way he could have predicted that his camping team would be attacked by Mutated Redneck Zombies. Plus his bad acting is hilarious. Also He sees a dead body then grabs a bottle of the infected moonshine that turns rednecks into Zombies and says ''Oh man I'm drinking this shit!''

malaria
11-20-2001, 04:42 AM
Countchocula, that line in Brain Damage had me doubled in hysterics.

Mojo67821
11-20-2001, 12:06 PM
after watching Pumpkinhead 2: Bloodwings the other day to review it for my site, I'd have to say this one...

"She's one step away from (dramatic pause), being scared to death!"

that's far and away one of the cheesiest lines I have ever heard in a horror flick.

Also, I love in Nightmare on Elm St 3 when Heather Langenkamp is staring straight at a door with Kincaid and Kristen and she says...

"It's a door"

ya no shit Heather, thanks alot. She never was the brightest, good thing she's got one sweet hiney...

countchocula
11-23-2001, 06:59 PM
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by malaria:
Countchocula, that line in Brain Damage had me doubled in hysterics. </font>

Diddo. I wonder where I could find the lyrics to "Aylmer's Tune."

CriticalBill6966
11-24-2001, 12:46 AM
I like,

"I came to kick ass and chew bubblegum, and I'm all out of gum."---They Live

not a horror movie but one of my favorits is from Six String Samiari

If you were me, you'll be good looking.

HalloweenJack
11-24-2001, 12:49 AM
"Uh oh." from faust. mainly because it was stupid much like the whole movie

Antonio
11-24-2001, 12:51 AM
"Now this is my kinda place!" (George Clooney in FROM DUSK TILL DAWN).

DeadByDawn
11-24-2001, 03:43 AM
"I love the smell of zombies in the morning!"

That was from Zombie 90: Extreme Pestillence by Andreas Schnaas.

countchocula
11-24-2001, 01:45 PM
"I kick ass for the Lord."-Dead Alive

Mojo67821
11-25-2001, 05:20 PM
I just watched Jack Frost for the first time the other day and I've got to say when they're trying to kill him with blowdryers for the second time and he's like...

"Blow me!",

funny shit...

I've got to mention a non genre film though...

"there's only 2 men I trust, one of em's me, and the other's not you..."

Nicholas Cage
Con Air

cheech
11-26-2001, 12:14 PM
Nailgun Massacre!
Every time the killer, dressed with a black motorcykel helmet, kills someone he (or she) delivers a really cheesy oneliner.
I can only think of one right now; when a hitch-hiker is pinned to the ground by a couple of nails, the killer says: "I hate being stuck on the road!"
Trust me, it's hilarious!

The Evil Demonic Zombie
11-29-2001, 08:11 PM
In the Thing when they observe the head w/ spider legs crawling away one guy says:
"You gotta be fucking kiddin' me!"
Great stuff!

zeke1313
12-05-2001, 12:22 AM
Mine would have to be from the "Return of The Living Dead 2" (I think) The Zombie head (the one who keeps showing up through out the whole movie) is laying there at the end screaming:
"You'll never win, you cant defeate us, you'll never win...(then some guy with a blow torch shows up and torches the talking zombie head)...Alright you win...for now!"

And theres also that part cose to the beggining when the zombie head first shows up and the older guy sticks a screw driver in its head it yells:
"God Damit theres a Screw Driver in my head!"
(it wasent so much the line but more if a mix of the line and the features on its face that made it so funny).
If you want to hear a bunch of cheesy one liners I suggest you go out and rent all those zombie movies out there from around the late '70s and mid 80's. Alot of those were damn cheesy and only succeded in making you laugh then scare you, some good ones to check out are Chud 2 (pretty funny...especially the attacking poodle scene of the mailman) and Both Return of the Living Dead (1&2 not 3).

Jason Voorhees
12-05-2001, 02:26 AM
Ye! CHUD 2 is Hilarious! Gotta be one of the funniest movies I have ever seen. From the horrid theme song to the acting of Robert Vaughn this is one funny movie, Of course most of the best humor is unintentional but there is a lot of funny one liners and stuff. Recommended rental for anyone. Funny lines from that flick

''They're CHUDS, Very Hungry people with a brain that doesnt know when to quit!'' Robert Vaughn says this, Almost everything he says is funny, expecially the ''Ugly Barber'' comment

''What in the Wide World of Sports is going on here?!'' Farmer says this after encountering a series of CHUDS in his barn, Anyway the movie rules, sorry If i spolied a good line or 2 for anyone.

countchocula
12-05-2001, 02:52 PM
"That's my mother you're pissing on."-Dead Alive
"Just don't stare at it, eat it."-American Psycho

Scully1888
12-05-2001, 03:10 PM
BEST DELIBERATELY FUNNY LINE:

"Do you ever remember your dreams?"
"Only the wet ones"
(NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 2)


BEST UNDELIBERATELY FUNNY LINE

"Misery comes in lots of forms... it's all miserable"
(BLOODY MURDER)

Leather x Face
12-05-2001, 06:29 PM
'Oh you gotta be fuckin' kiddin me!'
' DON'T FUCK WITH THE CHUCK!'
- Childs Play 3

'I want my Lucky Charms!'
- Leprachaun

Not a one liner, but when Freddy flew on a broom by the fuckin' house, I had to pause
Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare, because I was laughing so hard.

Green
12-06-2001, 02:21 PM
I love when John Ritter says "I can make your test look like Christian Slater on New Year's Eve!" in Bride of Chucky

Irish13
12-06-2001, 02:46 PM
Kurt Russel in The Thing. "yeah, and fuck
you too!"

fyffe
12-07-2001, 12:07 AM
THere are many in Cannibal - the musical...
One of my favs is when they first meet the Trappers and they are taunting them about being scared in the mountains and one of them says.." We are not scared...We have Jesus on our side.." too funny...

or when they are cold and hungry, someone suggests they eat their shoes .. and Humphrey says.." Im not eating my shoes.. you put your FEET in shoes.." yet he is willing to eat another person.. silly shit

cheech
12-07-2001, 05:15 AM
In Hellraiser 3: When Pinhead appeares in front of a man sitting in his bed:

Man: "Jesus Christ!!"
Pinhead: "Not quite."

FeydRautha
12-14-2001, 07:08 AM
OK, it ain't horror (promise I'll think up some more), but my housemate & I just sat through Shrek:

I've got a dragon here, and I ain't afraid to use it! I'M A DONKEY ON THE EDGE!!! - Donkey, Shrek

izombie
12-14-2001, 09:53 AM
"Did they look like psychos? Is that what they looked like? They were vampires. Psychos do not explode when sunlight hits them, I don't give a fuck how crazy they are." - Seth Gecko, From Dusk Till Dawn

Jason Voorhees
12-14-2001, 11:32 AM
lol Izombie, thats a great one

Alex Cross Fan
12-15-2001, 03:49 PM
"The only thing I could never stomach about living in Santa Carla, was all the goddamn vampires." The grandfather in The Lost Boys.

*sweet psychotic*
12-15-2001, 06:41 PM
OK it's not supposed to be funny but Dr. Loomis really gets into it when he says "It's eviiiiiiiiiiiiil!!" Someone needs to watch all the Halloween movies and count how many times he says "evil" in them.

FeydRautha
12-23-2001, 06:13 AM
From that wonderful piece of celluloid, "Elves":

Willy: What's the matter? Are we going to be alright??
Kirsten: No, Willy. Gramps is a Nazi.

Crap film, but those lines had me in stitches.

asyouwish530
12-23-2001, 07:25 AM
I always enjoy hearing morgue attendant Axel in Friday the 13th 4 after Jason's arm falls off the gurney and touches the backside of the nurse with whom he's about to go at it with- "Jesus Christmas! Holy Jesus God damn! Holy Jesus jumping Christmas Shit!"

Tyrone
12-23-2001, 03:28 PM
"This is not an exit" - AMERICAN PSYCHO

horrorbuff20
12-24-2001, 12:44 AM
"Kristen, We went over this in therapy!"

"No mother, you just murdered me. You take that to your goddamn therapy!"

OR

"Kristen! Get the hell away from that house! Andale! Andale, andale, andale!"

Nightmare On Elm Street 4

Tyrone
12-24-2001, 01:30 AM
Colonel Hart: A little too much bourbon in his [my] bourbon. - Jeffrey Jones in RAVENOUS.

Not so much a laugh out loud line as much as one I use on a daily basis.

[This message has been edited by Tyrone (edited 12-25-2001).]

Majin Imhotep
12-29-2001, 05:51 PM
Let's see hmmmm.... There were a couple I thought were kind of funny

"Pot's a misdemeanor. Decapitation seems a bit severe".-Tom Seizmore in "The Relic"

(In "From Dusk till Dawn:

Jacob:Has anyone here read a real book about vampires, or are we just remembering what some movies said? I mean a real book.

Sex Machine:What, you mean like a time-life book?)

[This message has been edited by Majin Imhotep (edited 12-29-2001).]

FeydRautha
01-01-2002, 08:53 AM
Just caught this one in Night Watch after watching it again. The Duty Doctor picks up a corpse's wrist and pretends to take her pulse, then turns to Ewan MacGregor and says sarcastically:

"Well, what do you know? It would appear that she is as dead as a FUCKING DOORNAIL."

The way he drops her wrist and it lands with a loud *slap* across her midriff just made it funnier.

Gandalf the Grey
01-01-2002, 09:21 AM
Dead-Alive:
-"Party's over."
-"That's some nasty plaque you got there, mate."
From Dusk Till Dawn:
-"I'm peachy, Kate. The world is my oyster."
-"It's called a punch."
-"I may be a bastard, but I'm not a fucking bastard."
Evil Dead 2:
-"Give me back my haaaaannnnnd!"
-"Who's laughing now?!"
-"Here's your new home."
-"Groovy."
Ghosts of Mars:
-"Come on you mindless motherfuckas!"
-"Come on. The tide is up. Time to stay alive."
-"How the hell did that happen?"
-"See you later, you big motherfucka!"
Vampires:
-"You're not starting to fall for this half-dead little whore?"
-"After 600 years, how's that dick working? Pretty good?"

SteveSzyk
01-07-2002, 08:14 PM
Bump

FeydRautha
01-08-2002, 10:15 AM
Thanks, Steve. Found another one in Jack Frost:

1st Deputy: What's eating that guy?
2nd Deputy: Not his girlfriend, that's for sure.

Irish13
01-08-2002, 12:09 PM
"stop your grin`in and drop your linen" Hudson from Aliens.

izombie
01-09-2002, 10:24 AM
"To know life, Otto, you must first fuck death in the gall bladder!": Baron Frankenstein, Flesh for Frankenstein.

"I know you men have been through a lot, but if it's all the same to you, I'd rather not spend the rest of this winter TIED TO THIS FUCKING COUCH": Gary, The Thing

"I dunno what the hell's in there, but it's weird and pissed off whatever it is." Clark The Thing

"Now you fucks have gone too far! Goddamn heads landing on cars while Long Island families are singing 'Found a Peanut'! They found a peanut, all right, honey. They found a peanut of death!" Detective, Tromeo and Juliet

"Hey, somebody get some light over here, Trash is taking off her clothes again." Return of the Living Dead

"But I don't care darling, because I love you, and you've got to let me eat your brains!" Freddy, Return of the Living Dead

I know the topic is one liners but I love this conversation from Return of the Living Dead:

Burt:"I thought you said that if we destroyed the brain, it would die."
Frank: "It worked in the movie."
Burt: "Well it ain't working now Frank."
Freddy: "You mean the movie lied?"

Commando Spidey
01-12-2002, 01:01 PM
Lets head down into that celler and carve ourselves a witch - Ash, Evil Dead 2

CKY
01-12-2002, 04:58 PM
"Well, all the rats jumped off the slave ships and raped the little tree monkeys!" - Brain Dead [Dead Alive]

Although it's not a horror movie, the best ever movie quotes come from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, my favourite film.

"WAIT! we can't stop here.... this is ... BAT country!"

"Please, tell me about the fuckin golf shoes!"

"I was a fairly respectable citizen, sure a multiple felon, but a fairly respectable citizen"

"do you want a smoke, a beer, some ether?"

XCoRyX
01-12-2002, 10:01 PM
"You want your forune told?You're ugly and your gonna wet the bed again tonight..."
Randy,Clownhouse

"I think my mask of sanity is about to slip"
Patrick Bateman,American Psycho

"Nilbog!Its goblin spelled backwards!"
joshua,troll 2

"this old lep he played one he played pogo on your lung!"
leprechaun

Green
01-13-2002, 03:04 PM
In the meantime, I'll be shroomin' mutherfucker! - Friole, The Convent

Jesus Christ on a bicycle! - Pam, Ginger Snaps

Who's going to believe a talking head? Get a job in a sideshow. - West, Re-Animator

FeydRautha
01-14-2002, 05:13 AM
That which is eternal cannot die. But if it's any consolation to you, Alex...that HURT LIKE HELL!!
- The Djinn, Wishmaster

Juice
01-15-2002, 10:06 AM
I love almost every Chucky oneliner, and I also love these Ash oneliners in Evil Dead 2.

FeydRautha
01-16-2002, 03:28 AM
One of my fave bits in Galaxy Quest is when Jason Nesmith is talking to devoted fan Brandon on a communicator:

Brandon: Look, I've thought about what you said at the convention, and I just want you to know that I'm not some nutcase that think's the show's real. I know you and the crew are just actors, and the ship is just a--

Nesmith: Brandon...it's all real.

Brandon: I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT!!

DeadByDawn
01-16-2002, 06:56 AM
"Send more paramedics!"

You know what I mean! Return Of The Living Dead!

PapaJupe2k
01-16-2002, 12:15 PM
Friday the 13th part 6, Tommy and Meghan are fleeing the cops. She made him duck his head down in the front seat to avoid detection. With him staring straight at her crotch, she says "hang on this is gonna be a hairy turn." Pure gold people!

Lady Summerisle
01-19-2002, 03:40 PM
izombie, yes, yes, yes
FLESH FOR FRANKENSTEIN has one of the best lines in history, and makes fun of LAST TANGO IN PARIS.
RotLD is full of one-liners, of the most blackest of comedy.
Man, I thought Ash was my one-liner guru.
I have one, from the WICKER MAN
HOWIE: But they're naked.
Summerisle: NATURALLY, its much too dangerous to jump through a fire with your clothes on.

screamtrilogy1
01-20-2002, 06:52 PM
"the question is where am i?"scream
"mother fucker!"ice cube in ghosts of mars
"someone want to be my valentine?"denise richard in valentine
"urban legend my ass"loretta devine in ULFC
"it's your turn to scream asshole"neve campbell in scream 3

skweemkween
01-22-2002, 03:26 PM
Great choices so far guys...
here's some more...

Lick my plate you-dogdick!!

Namland!!!!

Burn her like a rat! Burn her like a rat!
Burn her like a rat,rat,rat!
-Chop Top Bill Moseley,
Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2

Mmm-finger lickin' good!
I hate it when they ain't been shaved!
I got a new name for you! Mr.Peaknuckle!!
-Severin Bill Paxton
Near Dark

Is that gasoline I smell?
-Eric Draven Brandon Lee
The Crow

Fuck Heiniken! Pabst Blue Ribbon!!
-Frank Dennis Hopper
Blue Velvet

Jerreline, I l-l-l-l- YOU! Do you think you could ever find it in your heart to l-l-l-l ME?
-The Collector Billy THE MAN Zane
Demon Knight

A few boos from the gallows I see.
It's a wonderful life.
-Zodiac Killer Brad Dourif
Exorcist 3

*sweet psychotic*
01-22-2002, 08:12 PM
"Yo, She-bitch, let's go"-Ash

"Your mother ate my dog!.....not all of it"-Dead-Alive

izombie
04-12-2002, 12:51 PM
Great call on The Corw quote skweemkween.

Here are a few more:

"How long you been fuckin fish?" - Creatures from the Abyss aka Plankton


"Tin Tin, somebody stuck his blades in all his major organs in alphabetical order." - T-Bird, The Crow

"Go ahead and shoot, Fun Boy. You've got me dead bang" - Eric Draven, The Crow

Sam Hain
04-12-2002, 01:10 PM
"you dont know what death is"-doc loomis,h2

Sam Hain
04-13-2002, 01:50 AM
2 more from wishmaster

"piss complected afterbirth to a chinese gang-banger"
"all right then,fuck it!you know what i say:if you cant beat'em,burn them,baby"

stevereno
04-16-2002, 09:56 PM
"get away from her you bitch" -ripley aliens

"we totally annihilated the one who look's like twisted sister" -cory feldman the lost boys

"up yours with a twirlling lawn mower" -rod a nightmare on elm street

[This message has been edited by stevereno (edited 04-18-2002).]

Andrew Tom
04-17-2002, 01:08 AM
These are from Hellraiser, I didn't see anyone else quoting them.

Pinhead explaining what they are: "Demons to some, angels to others."

And of course the famous "Jesus wept..." line which sends shivers down my spine.

Then there's the classic line: "What's your pleasure, sir?"

And finally my favorite: "We have such sights to show you."

tvmorbid
04-18-2002, 08:36 AM
Im not sure if its intentional, but in Helraiser: Bloodlines at one point the hero goes "For God's sake please!" and Pinhead replies "Do I look like the kind of person who cares what God thinks?" in his loud monotone. It had me on the floor

freddy666
04-18-2002, 09:00 AM
Some Freddy one liners are always great:

"Welcome to prime time, bitch!"

"How sweet, fresh meat."

"How's this for a wet dream"

"Well it ain't Dr.Suess"

"Don't Dream and Drive"

"No screamin while the bus is in motion"

"Nice hearing from ya Carlos"


And many more............

DeadByDawn
04-18-2002, 12:15 PM
"You gotta be fucking kidding me..."
Palmer noticing the creature formed from Norris' head walking down the floor in The Thing

"First week of goddamn winter."
MacReady after Dr. Copper shot the berserk norwegian guy.

"Say AAH, motherfucker!"
Steven Beck shoving a dynamite down to the big fucking mutant's mouth in Leviathan.

horrorfanatic
04-18-2002, 08:50 PM
"no, no sydney, movies dont make psychos, movies make psychos more original"- Billy- Scream

Blue Ig
04-24-2002, 10:32 AM
"Kirikirikirikiri!" - The Audition

shortyguy12189
04-29-2002, 03:38 PM
"hello,sidney"--- the killer in scream
"hello,michael.i've been waiting for you. what took you so long?"---jaime lee curtis in HALLOWEEN:RESSURRECTION
"its jason fuckin voorhees, thats what"--chick in jason x, or "she's screwed" (jason x)

izombie
05-22-2002, 01:25 PM
"Who's going to believe a talking head? Get a job in a sideshow." Herbert West - ReAnimator

FeydRautha
07-24-2002, 11:14 PM
BUMP for the Funniest Line folks, but I also thought of another one:

I've seen shit that would turn you WHITE!!! - Ernie Hudson, Ghostbusters

NightHorrorChick
07-24-2002, 11:36 PM
"That's my mum you're pissing on." Dead-Alive

thirdeye
07-27-2002, 02:13 PM
"That which is eternal cannot die. But if it's any consolation to you, sweet Alex, THAT HURT LIKE HELL!"
"My God!
Djinn: Not yet, human. Soon... very soon I will be."
WISHMASTER

"It has 13 dicks and 1 ball in is crimanal record"
Killer Condom

HorrorScreenwriter
07-28-2002, 02:43 PM
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by horrorbuff20:
"Kristen, We went over this in therapy!"

"No mother, you just murdered me. You take that to your goddamn therapy!"

OR

"Kristen! Get the hell away from that house! Andale! Andale, andale, andale!"

Nightmare On Elm Street 4

</font>

It's sad, I got that whole thing memorized.

KRISTEN
Sleeping pills!?

MOM
Look, Kristen, I'm sorry

KRISTEN
Sorry?! You and your tennis pals torch this guy, and now he's after me. In case you haven't been keeping score, it's his fucking banquet and I'm the last course.

MOM
Kristen! We went over this in therapy!

KRISTEN
No mother, you just murdered me. Take that to your gaddamn therapy!

http://www.joblo.com/ubb/smile.gif

I do like that freddy line

"This is it Jennifer! Your big break in TV, welcome to primetime bitch!"

Or in Wes Craven's New Nightmare

ENGLUND
I think they'd like to see us in a movie together again.

LANGENKAMP
What? A Romantic Comedy?

ENGLUND
Just cause it's a comedy, doesn't mean we can't have a decapitation or two."

************SPOILER**************

A scene in New Nightmare that sent chills down my spine had to do with Dylan. Hearing him approach Langenkamp singing the well known jump rope song about to attack Langenkamp with his version of freddy's glove, was chilling. I thought anyway.

HorrorScreenwriter

teenkiller
09-10-2002, 08:53 PM
"This is GOD" FREDDY, NOES
"Welcome to Prime Time BITCH!!" FREDDY, THE DREAM WARRIORS
"Now you're gonna get it bitch!" -DEMON, FRIDAY 5
"Hi I'm Chucky. Wanna play?"
"Who's laughing now?" Ash, Evil Dead 2
"JUST LIKE A WART!" Billy, Black Christmas
"JESUS wept..." FRANK, Hellraiser
"It's gonna take more than a poke in the ribs to keep this old dog down... yeah... that'll do it" -Broadski, JASON X
"Take your best shot" -Julius, FRIDAY 8
"The bastard son of a hundred maniacs" Amanda Krueger, THE DREAM WARRIORS
"The saw is family"
"Boooooooyyyyyy" -The Tall Man, THE PHANTASM
"Piss your pants" -KRUG, THE LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT
"Moooooooo" -WEASEL, THE LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT
"Did they look like psychos? Psychos do not EXPPLODE when they hit sunlight I don't care how crazy they are!" -Seth Gecko, From Dusk Till Dawn
"I shot him SIX TIMES!" -Dr. Sam Loomis, Halloween 2
"I'm gonna break your face" -Scotty, The Evil Dead
"You've gotta be fukcing kidding me" -Palmer, The Thing
"Stop fukcing with me! GIMME THE GODDAM FLUTE!!" -Mack Daddy O'Nassis, Lep in the Hood
"I've been guarding my gate for a long time BITCH!!" -FREDDY, THE DREAM MASTER

Well thats all for now GOoD JOURNEY my fellow schmoes.

stevereno
09-10-2002, 10:09 PM
"he told me to physically insert a love-fear lifeline into my anus"

DONNIE DARKO

SHIVER ME TIMBERS

Reigh Kaufman
09-18-2008, 07:46 AM
Chucky is using an axe to break through the bathroom door a la 'The Shining'. The camera moves into a close-up of his face, which is full of rage...then suddenly he looks puzzled:

"You know, I can't think of a single thing to say."

Randy on the phone to the Killer in 'Scream 2':

"Fuuuuuuuck yoooooou!"

MacReady is playing chess with a computer. The computer checkmates him in the Endgame. He pours his glass of bourbon over the monitor:

"Cheatin' bitch!"

David is trying to get arrested in 'American Werewolf in London':

"Queen Elizabeth is a man!"

From 'The Lost Boys':

"Holy shit! It's the attack of Eddie Munster!"

Soulburn420
09-18-2008, 10:55 AM
"If can find pussy cheaper than that.... FUUUUUCK IT!" Cheech Marin in From Dusk til Dawn.

"Yo, She-Bitch. Let's go." Ash in Army of Darkness

"Where did they dig this guy up?" John Larroquette in Tales from the Crypt Demon Knight about the Cryptkeeper.

"When I was kicking your ass back there, did you get wood?" James Woods in Vampires.

"Bring more cops!" Zombie in Return of the Living Dead.

"Who died and made you the fucking king of the zombies?" Ed in Shaun of the Dead.

jtwist78
09-18-2008, 02:47 PM
[QUOTE=izombie;423205
"Hey, somebody get some light over here, Trash is taking off her clothes again." Return of the Living Dead

"But I don't care darling, because I love you, and you've got to let me eat your brains!" Freddy, Return of the Living Dead
[/QUOTE]

So much gold from ROTLD:
"..and these two genuises managed to let the sun of a bitch out, LET HIM OUT!" - Bert

"Watch your tongue boy if you like this job!" - Frank

"bust 'em in the damn head" - Spider

"Come on, stupid honky" - Spider

"hey, fuck you, ballbuster" - Suicide

Sleepaway Camp:
"I'll be right there, I gotta take a wicked dump"

"hey bob-a-ree-bob, hey, hey bob-a-ree-bob" Dummy singing to himself under the overturned canoe - why the hell would he do that?????

athf1980
09-18-2008, 02:52 PM
Nightmare on elm street 3

Welcome to prime time, bitch.-Freddy

jtwist78
09-18-2008, 02:53 PM
And theres also that part cose to the beggining when the zombie head first shows up and the older guy sticks a screw driver in its head it yells:
"God Damit theres a Screw Driver in my head!"
(it wasent so much the line but more if a mix of the line and the features on its face that made it so funny).

haha, good one, I think the line is "Get that damn screwdriver out of my head"

Haddonfield14
09-26-2008, 02:37 PM
"Oh Jordy, you've gone and done it now!" - Creepshow
"Where's my caaaake??!!" - Creepshow
"Run Rabbit RUN!!!" - House of 1000 Corpses
"You like Violence, freaks of nature?" - House of 1000 Corpses

Le_Big_Mac
09-28-2008, 02:17 PM
"You're gonna need a bigger boat." - Martin Brody (Roy Scheider), Jaws

“A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.” – Hannibal Lecter (Anthony Hopkins), The Silence of the Lambs

"Here's Johnny!" - Jack Torrance (Jack Nicholson), The Shining

"We all go a little mad sometimes." - Norman Bates (Anthony Perkins), Psycho

"Get away from her, you bitch!" - Ellen Ripley (Sigourney Weaver), Aliens

"It's alive!" - Dr. Henry Frankenstein (Colin Clive), Frankenstein

"Oh, in the name of God! Now, I know what it feels like to be God!" - Dr. Henry Frankenstein (Colin Clive), Frankenstein

"To a new world of gods and monsters!" - Dr. Pretorius (Ernest Thesiger), Bride of Frankenstein

"Yeah, fuck you too." - MacReady (Kurt Russell), The Thing

"An intellectual carrot. The mind boggles." - Ned Scott (Douglas Spencer), The Thing From Another World

"Watch the skies, everywhere. Keep looking. Keep watching the skies!" - Ned Scott (Douglas Spencer), The Thing From Another World

"They're here already! You're next! You're next!" - Dr. Miles J. Bennell (Kevin McCarthy), Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956)

"I see dead people." - Cole Sear (Haley Joel Osment), The Sixth Sense

"Well hello Mister Fancypants. Well, I've got news for you pal, you ain't leadin' but two things, right now: Jack and shit...and Jack just left town." - Ash (Bruce Campbell), Army of Darkness

"Is this your wife? What a lovely throat." - Graf Orlock (Max Shreck), Nosferatu (1922)

"Bring more cops!" - Zombie, Return of the Living Dead

"Your mother sucks cocks in hell." - Pazuzu (Mercedes McCambridge), The Exorcist

Il_Duce
09-29-2008, 12:06 AM
Dawn of the Dead (remake)

Kenneth: Is everyone there dead?
Steve: Well, dead-ish.
Kenneth: Is everyone there dead?
Steve: Yeah, in the sense that they all sort of, uh... fell down... and then got up... and started eating each other.

Michael: Look, there's no point in arguing about this, all right? We need a solution. We need... we need to get some food over there.
Steve: Yeah, OK, I have an idea. We draw straws and the loser runs across the lot with a ham sandwich.

Michael: [to Norma on her rescue] Well done.
Norma: Thanks.
Steve: Hey, I'm sorry, excuse me... when you two fellas are done blowing each other, maybe Davy Crockett could tell us the deal here?

Ana: You guys had really rough childhoods, didn't you? Little bit rocky?