Reviews: Rollerball

[JoBlo]

JoBlo's 3/10 review of ROLLERBALL can be found here: http://www.joblo.com/rollerball.htm

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[Ultimate_Sandwich]

Just saw this movie today, before reading any reviews and having high expectations. The thing that made me want to see it the most was the scene in the trailer where they show the conspiracy behind the game, where one camera follows the action and four cameras follow the young man who gets brutally pounded. Looked good, but wow, what a disappointment. Any scene where the characters were not in roller skates seemed to be just filler, and were very boring. Especially the night-vision scene, which was beyond lame. The actual rollerball scenes were very good and entertaining though, and I wanted more of them. Other than that, this movie had nothing. During the movie, my friend turned to me and said "you know what this movie needs?" My answer was "a script." See it on video, it's at least a little better than Joblo makes it out to be.
5/10

The night-vision scene was done for one of two reasons. Either they wanted to show how pitch black it was out there (and if so, how the hell could anyone see what they were doing???) or they didn't want to put the time and effort into getting proper lighting for such a large area. Either way, a huge mistake by the filmmakers.

[This message has been edited by Ultimate_Sandwich (edited 02-08-2002).]

[This message has been edited by JoBlo (edited 02-09-2002).]

[Mike]

I went to this movie tonight with some friends at the last minute. The theater we went to was only playing three movies so we decided to see this.
OH MY GOD what a horrible movie!!! I have a feeling this will be the worst movie I see in 2002. It starts out cool but then it goes down hill FAST.

I was so damn bored and uninterested during this movie. I tried to get comfortable so I could go to sleep but I couldn't. So I had to suffer through this mess of a movie and waste of film.

I went with three other people and they all hated it, we were laughing so hard throughout the whole movie and making fun of it. And I will say this, if you do see this movie, go with a group of people so you can make fun of it. I can't imagine anyone liking this movie.

I hope it bombs!!! I want my money and the hour and fourty minutes of my life back.

Rollerball shouldn't be a movie, it should be edited into a two minute music video. And I will say that the music is pretty much the only good thing about the movie, they should have had more music. But they should have taken that stupid band Slipknot out of the movie. They suck about as much as the movie.

Rollerball is a confusing mess of a movie and I was so bored that I didn't know what was going on during the movie, and I didn't care either. I just kept praying for the end.

EVERYONE STAY AWAY FROM THIS PIECE OF SHIT!

Grade: 3/10

[Invincible]

Well last night me and my frined went to see the movie at 9:35pm! http://www.joblo.com/ubb/mad.gif cause there was only late screenings. I expected a little more audience when we go to the auditorium since it's a new movie, so these faggets in the front row about 5 16 year olds with like 3 girls yell "Rollerball!!!" every fuckin 5 seconds So I was thinking hmm must be a good movie, nope wrong thought. And how can it be a Russian game? why da fuck making my country even more lower than it is right now by giving it such a gay game.

I was so fuckin tired watching this movie! so was my friend! and what's with the nightvision camera for like 15 minutes? an offroad plane? da fuck it got me so bored? There is no storyline at all! Tomb Raider beats it 10 times as hard! TR was not the best movie but heck the movie at least had a hot chic in it!

My advice don't go watching this SHIT! even cause Slipknot is there for like 1 minute. http://www.joblo.com/ubb/mad.gif gay movie I cannoyt believe makers of The Fast And The Furious lowered themselves like that!

The end was a little bit better but still sucked!

2/10

[The Clown]

Damn, was the movie really THAT BAD?!?!
NO!

Actually, I thought it kicked ass. The only reason I went to the movie is because I heard that Slipknot was going to be in it (I am a Slipknot fan). I thought the movie was surprisingly good. Nothing fantastic but still a good movie.

...I still dont get why they shot a whole scene in greenlights though...

Rollerball
7/10

[brandon918]

This movie was pretty good. The characters were kind of shitty but LL cool J was pretty good. There was no character development but if you go to see a movie titled ROLLERBALL then you are an idoit for expecting it. The rollerball scenes are really cool and are well staged and so was the beginning with the extreme sport thing. Rebecca romajin stamos is very hot and was wasted with her role under a mask.

The only thing that sucked was that green picture shit. It was infa red and was very unnessacery.Respect to mctiernan for trying something new but it went on to long. Lots of people were wondering why he did it. The infa red was there because they were in the middle of a dessert and there was no lights, but he should have found another way. Anyway, i still give this a 7\10 evan though there were some plot holes.

[Strider]

Rollerball (2002)

Rated PG-13 for Violence, Extreme Sports Action, Sensuality, Language, & Drug References

Director:John McTiernan

Starring Chris Klein, Jean Reno, LL Cool J, & Rebecca Romijn-Stamos.

The film's plot focuses on Jonathan Cross(Chris Klein)who plays this deadly sport called "Rollerball". Eventually, Jonathan decides to rebel with some other fellow players against the sport's owner, Alexi Petrovich(Jean Reno)because he's treating them badly.

What the hell, I'm just gonna say this early. This film was trash, garbage, and shit. And there's not one damn good thing I can say about it. So, with that said, let's get to the negative comments I have about it.

First off, let's start with the acting. It was terrible. Chris Klein delivered a very bad performance, LL Cool J played LL Cool J, and Rebecca Romijn-Stamos only managed to pull-off a pretty good Russian accent. As for Jean Reno, what the fuck was he doing in this film?! He's a great actor, and one of the best in the business, but his acting was just horrible.

Another thing I hated about this film was the story, wait, excuse me, there was no fucking story! Also, the dialogue sucked, and the characters were poorly developed.

And last but not least, the action sequences were not very impressive. They weren't exciting, and they weren't the type of action sequences that leave you with your mouth open. In fact, to be quite honest, they were boring.

You know, writing movie reviews has been my hobby for almost four years now, and I think Rollerball is one of the worst films I have ever written a review for. For being an "action" film, the film moved at a slow pace, had hardly any action, and let's not forget, it was boring as hell. From beginning to end, it was so hard for me to believe that this awful film was directed by John McTiernan. Who brought us films like "Die Hard", "Predator", & "The Hunt for Red October". I feel sorry for McTiernan, his latest film is an embarrassment. Anyway, I don't care if you have nothing to do, or if you're bored, or if there's no films to go see, avoid this film at all costs.

Running Time:1 hour 38 minutes

Grade:2/10

Strider

[This message has been edited by Strider (edited 02-13-2002).]

[Tommy Magnum]

I have to admit... I am pretty embarassed I told my friends and family I'm in this movie. I play one of the thugs. You can see me at the beginning of the last Rollerball match. I am the one walking out on the rink, with a pinch, bald head and a pair of sun glasses, picked out by MC T himself. I'm also in a scene a few minutes later when the French froggies in Blainville start chanting JONA-TON! JONA-TON! See, us frenchies can't pronounce our TH's.

Now, back to the movie. I ate with the crew during the filming of the movie. I can say, with all honesty, that LL is a nice guy. He may lick his lips after every sentence, but he's ok. Klein, on the other hand, is an idiot. An immature idiot. He has no brains and no acting chops. But you knew that if you saw the film. I never got a chance to meet Stamos or Reno. But I was pretty familiar with the Rollerballers. Especially the cute chick with the shaved head and tattoo and the light-skinned black one.

Oh yeah, the movie. MC T isn't a bad guy. He may have skin like RON REUSCH, (if you are from Montreal, you would know he is a sports caster who impregnated another news lady, but I forget her name... oh wait, Suzanne Deshotels) and he is pretty precise and concise and he has good vision since he picke d me out of the crowd in Blainville to be a Special Skills Extra. I went from 80 bucks a day to 40 bucks an hour.

Almost forgot, the film.

DO NOT GO SEE IT. Unless you wanna see me in it.

[Puck Bond]

Rollerball 4/10...

Rollerball is well a mess of a movie, and pretty embarrasing coming from one of the best action directors and one of my personal favorites John McTiernan. The troubles start with the game itself...rollerball, it just doesn't translate well on screen. the action is too-fast paced, kinetic and it is hard to see what is going on most of the time...and it seems like its just an excuse for people in weird masks and costumes to beat the hell out of each other while the hero races around with the ball. And speaking of the "hero" Chris Klein is likeable in stuff like American Pie and Election but ask him to be a lead in an action movie come on!! He is just bland and unassuming...lacks presence. LL Cool J is what he is and Robecca Romijn Stamos is the most interesting of the bunch but doesn't have much to say or do. As for Jean Reno as the villain who feels it neccesary to hurt, maim and kill his athletes for higher ratings...anyway he is ludicrous in this role. As for the night-vision scene well...it looked kinda cool, but why the hell was it even like that? No idea. The opening sequence is cool and the idea of a futuristic game is ok but ultimately Rollerball is an incoherent mess and did I mention some of the worst and shoddy editing and cuts Ive ever seen!!

[ilovemovies]

I honestly did not think the movie was that bad. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't that great and the movie seems to barely have a plot, some of dialogue is pretty bad (Chris Klien is heart the most with this and that is probably his line delivery is a little awkward at times) and then there is that night time scene shot entirely in green lights. You know, John McTiernen is usually a pretty awesome director of action movies, but WHAT THE HELL WAS HE THINKING WITH THIS SCENE! He didn't actually think this made it better, did he? I could barely tell what was going on in this entire scene. It was just HORRIBLE! The acting is adequate at best although it is not entirely their fault I mean, like I said, the dumb dialogue certainly doesn't help. What I did like: I thought the opening scene was pretty cool and I thought the ending was actually pretty exciting. So, overall, although this movie isn't great or even particularly good it was a pleasant enough diversion and ok way to kill two hours (green light scene notwithstanding)

Grade: B-

[Spoiledrichkid]

I AGREE WITH EVERYONE HERE.PLEASE AVOID THIS MOVIE.

I, an innocent little richkid, decided to see this movie since everything else was sold out.Little did I know,I would be raped in the ass for the next 90 minutes.

SYNOPSIS.[chock full of SPOILERS,like you care]

CK:Hi.I am Chris Klein.My non-threatening personality will definitely suit this character.Great casting.

Loud,obnoxious music blares.
SUICIDAL rollerballers/stuntpeople race around and do STUNTS.This is ENTERTAINING.

Someone shows CK a helmet with a cut chin strap.
CK:Wow,it's funny how you just happen to have this helmet with you...at a club...knowing I would be here...its amazing and NOT at all a coincidence.People,I think we've got ourselves a plotline.

Loud,obnoxious music blares.
The rollerballers start KILLING each other.
Oh,hi Pink.
More obnoxious music blares.
END.

Chris Klein,you fucker,Im sending YOU my hearing aid bill!

If you have an urge to see Rollerball, just play Tony Hawk Pro Skater on playstation for 90 minutes,trust me it'll be better than the movie.

[marmalade]

Rollerball (2002)

Starring LL Cool J, Chris Klein, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos, Jean Reno. Directed by John McTiernan, Written by William Harrison.

Runtime – 98 Minutes.

I am always sceptical when Hollywood feels the need to remake a movie. I am even more sceptical when the writer of the original, submits a remade script of his biggest achievement, to bring it “up to date”.

Why am I sceptical?

Because it’s shit.

Not just a little bit shit, but a huge steamer, straight from the arse of John McTiernan.

For those of you who are privileged enough to have avoided Rollerball so far, the rules are simple.

Rollerball is a contact sport, whose arena is similar to an 8 shaped roller rink. The ball is made from a solid aluminium alloy which is passed to the forward players. The forwards must do 2 laps of the rink and throw the heavily weighted ball into a conical shaped horn, setting off pyro’s to count as a goal. The difficult part is facing the opposing blockers who use motorbikes, fists and even the ball itself, to stop you from progressing in the game.

In 1977, it was somewhat believable that by 2018, the globe would be moved by such corporate corruption as to watch death sports for entertainment. Now with the remake, we are supposed to believe that from 2002 to 2005 that no one would watch Football, Ice Hockey, Basketball, Athletics, Baseball, American Football or even pro wrestling.

In the space of 3 years, Rollerbollocks, would dominate as the worlds biggest sport !

It seems apparent to me that this film has been destined for failure from the word go. In 2001, the release was delayed from May to July. Then delayed till August before the studio fucked it off until February 2002. This was because of negative preview audience reactions. So why the fuck put this out for cinema release when it should have gone straight to Channel 5 for a Tuesday night special.

Cutting a long story short, Rollerbollocks is now THE game. Every corporate commercial HAS to be played on “timeouts” during the big games. The viewing figures are not done on Neilson surveys, but are collated on a percentage of global figures watching. For example if their figures show 33, then they have 33% of the globe watching. Simple really. But global domination is not enough for ex-KGB operative Petrovich (Jean Reno) who is the head of Rollerbollocks programming. He decides that the sport needs to be more extreme to boost the ratings. So Jonathan Cross (Chris Klein), who incidentally becomes the worlds best Rollerballer, in a matter of months, decides that enough is enough and tries to flee with his team captain, Marcus (LL Cool J) and gets caught. Marcus dies and Cross is forced to play as his girlfriend also Rollerballs and is under threat from Petrovich.

Predictably, the crowd get pissed off when their favourite players start getting killed and maimed and stand up for themselves. Cross goes after Petrovich who has been painted a mean demon. “The KGB cross the street when they see him coming!” Yet, when a young man goes after him with a barstool, the Procurer of Torture runs away like a blonde with big tits in a Wes Craven horror flick.

When push comes to shove, this is really a shit movie. It doesn’t matter how many cameo appearances feature (Shane McMahon, Paul Heyman, Slipknot, Pink) it still can’t save the film. It looks like they realised that this was such a turd that they even filmed a 10 minute car chase in “night-vision” to gain artistic compliment.

But I have a little secret to share with John McTiernan - If you film brown shit in night vision, all you get is illuminous shit !

[XCoRyX]

i agree with the bashing for once,this was one of the worst of the year...this didnt even deserve to be in theaters,and is a disgrace to the original,i didnt even see the original but know this HAD to disappoint them somehow.

[Requiem-for-a-Dream]

Rollerball (R-Rated version)

Rated R for Strong, Bloody Violence, Gratuitous Nudity and mild language.

This movie is terrible. But I loved every minute of it. The plot is nowhere to be found, the characters underdeveloped (a huge understatement) and the direction was hilarious. This is popcorn entertainment at it's finest. This movie is perfect for late night watching with a couple of friends. I recommend it for fans of cheese and fans of Mrs. Stamos.

My rating- 7/10

Gore- Many bloody moments where peoples faces are bashed open on walls or other objects.

Nudity- Mrs. Stamos gets nude. We see all of her teamates naked in the locker room. There are nude chicks at a party.
For the ladies: Men without shirts in locker room, and possibly some butt shots.

Matt

[The1TrueFrog]

Rollerball - 3/10

http://us.ent4.yimg.com/movies.yahoo.com/images/hv/photo/movie_pix/mgm/rollerball/_group_photos/chris_klein1.jpg

Glad I skipped out on this mess when it was in theaters. I try to keep an open mind to a movie even when the reviews are against it, but in the case of this hour-and-a-half long sleeping pill I could have missed the video without losing any sleep over it.

The biggest problem I have with it is that it just doesn't know what to be. Is it a drama or an action flick? When you can't answer a question like that, it's pretty plain and clear that the movie is going to suck. Assuming it's an action movie -- where is the action, dammit? There are exactly 3 decent actions scenes - the opening, a scene in the middle where Chris Klein's character is under attack, and the ending.

Aside from those 3 scenes, all I got out of it was a bunch of B.S.. Most of the game sequences look almost fake enough to see the MGM lion roaring in the background. The night-vision green scene that everyone is talking about was just as lame to me as it was to them. And 3 words for this gripe -- TOO MANY SUBTITLES!! Half the actors in this film spend their roles speaking Russian, Chinese, German.. etc. And the plot? Evil Russian guys try to take over a sport too far-fetched to ever exist by causing bloody accidents in order to pump up the ratings back home... *yawn*... almost corny enough to make this flick a comedy, except I was snoring more than laughing.

Never saw the original.. from what I hear from JoBlo, I didn't miss much there either. I felt as if this movie was created just to sport a soundtrack, and no effort was put into making the other 80% of he movie enjoyable. The video I watched was also the new 'R'-Rated version = bloodier but still just as pointless.

I wonder how much the Washington Post and Houston Chronicle were paid to quote adjectives like "Turbo Charged" and "Full-Tilt"? I'm giving the 3 points for those 3 action sequences, and that's about the best I can do. I now have a whole new respect for the Nielson ratings system - there are many TV shows that well outdo this crap.