View Full Version : Remakes the official bitch about it thread.
bowieee
09-23-2002, 10:55 PM
While I was on the subject of bitching it dawned on me. we talk about how remakes of movies are usually shitty alot so let this be the technically offical thread for shitty remakes of the past present and future.
My pick for soon to be shittiest remake of all time *drumroll...*:
Texas Chainsaw massacre.
cereal killer
09-23-2002, 11:40 PM
im looking towards the possible remake of Dawn of the Dead which sounds like it's gonna suck bigtime.
FeverDog420
09-24-2002, 03:02 AM
Shittiest remake? How 'bout The Vanishing?
Silverload
09-24-2002, 03:08 AM
The shittiest remake is Carnival of Souls
The most pointless, waste of my time, remake is Psycho
fryman_3000
09-24-2002, 10:01 AM
How about the stupidest idea of them all, remaking the ITALIAN job and basing it in America with Mark fucking Wahlberg!!
"You're only supposed to blow the mother-fucking doors off" :D
How about other stupid ideas like "Dumb and Dumber 2". Really, who's going to watch this straight to video deal with none of the original cast? Why do studio's even bother? They must have people who like films or they wouldn't be working there, so why make all these shit re-makes? :confused:
James Logan
09-24-2002, 10:27 AM
Overall, I don't think remakes are a good idea. If a movie's done, then it's done, period, no need to make it all over again. I gotta admit sometimes the remake is better than the original (OCEAN'S ELEVEN comes to mind), but it's only in very few cases.
bowieee
09-24-2002, 12:57 PM
On a good note the remakes I actually like are:
The fly
and The Thing
I dislike remakes intensely. I'm a great believer in the maxim if it ain't broke, don't fix it and:
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre
The Wicker Man
The Italian Job
Dawn Of The Dead
Psycho
Planet Of The Apes
etc, etc
Ain't broke
Zebra 3
09-29-2002, 06:51 PM
It's hard to believe that Warner Bros.Studios is doing this...Personally I had enough with remakes, they too often fall short compared to the original.
El Bracamonti
09-30-2002, 10:13 AM
Originally posted by Silverload
The shittiest remake is Carnival of Souls
The most pointless, waste of my time, remake is Psycho
seriously! psycho was and still is one of the best movies ever. to remake this movie, was an absolute slap in the face to all of us fans, and especially to hitchcock, who is still and forever will be, a movie god. fuck remakes!
Sunshine
09-30-2002, 01:15 PM
Psycho.
That looked more like a parody than an actual remake.
tbone
09-30-2002, 01:33 PM
I didn't bother to check out the Psycho remake since I knew it would really blow. Planet of the Apes was awful also. What about Down to Earth I heard that was a really bad remake of Heaven Can Wait.
HM Murdock
10-08-2002, 06:53 AM
I;ve got to aggree with you guys on this one. I can't stand remakes. They're cheap ways to make money in my opinion. They cut out the need to think about a plot, something alot of moviemakers don't do any more (think about plot). There are hardly any decent remakes these days. Planet of the Apes, Physco, King Kong and Get Carter are a few movies that where remade.
When watching a movie, I've never thought, "Wow. That movie was good. I hope they remake it!" I doubt anyone thinks like that. So why do they keep doing it. I know they say, we're doing something new with it, but the never do. I'm just dreading the remake of WestWorld.
the movie guy
10-08-2002, 11:55 PM
Originally posted by Silverload
The shittiest remake is Carnival of Souls
The most pointless, waste of my time, remake is Psycho
You read my mind!
bowieee
10-09-2002, 12:57 AM
RED DRAGON= Pointless remake.
My fears and suspicians are true. Red Dragon doesnt hold a candle up to the original manhunter. I just rewatched manhunter today to make sure i wasnt over glorifying it in my memory. But I was right Manhunter is an epic masterfuly directed movie while Red Dragon could have been a cheesy made for tv movie. the onky saving grave for Red Dragon were the actors but even they couldnt save this movie that tried to remake a lower budget version of the book and failed miserably.
Planet of the Apes.
The Time Machine.
Both of those movies got dumbed down big time. Ok, the effects were better, but everything else (including the acting) sucked. I knew Planet... was gonna be bad as soon as Helena Bonham Carter walked on with her professionally styled blow wave hairdo and obvious make up. And she was supposed to be a wild jungle woman!
Zebra 3
10-10-2002, 06:20 PM
Originally posted by Mast
Planet of the Apes.
The Time Machine.
I agree, when I first saw that they sexed-up that monkey bitch I just had this bad feeling this remake like most others will suck and it certainly did.
I haven't seen Time Machine yet. Oddly enough a couple of years ago I mentioned it to a friend of mine that a remake could be a good idea, considering that the special effects have improved greatly since the original film and maybe this time the end would be based on H.G Wells' book not Hollywood's.
I never did hear anything good about that remake either, I thought wrong, oh well.
Psycho remake was laughably bad. (clouds, anyone?) I knew it'd suck, but half-watched while on the 'net one day just for the hell of it.
Planet of the Apes is a great film, and of course a remake wasn't needed but I thought Burton's effort was decent enough.
The ony good remake I think I've seen is A Fistful of Dollars, although I'd like to check out The Magnificent Seven soon.
Just remembered another one. Also a remake of a Hitchcock film, Rear Window with Reeves. What the hell was the point in this film? Just to give Reeves a role because he was in a wheelchair?
A Hitchcock film without Hitchcock's always going to be a waste of time. Hopefully we'll be finished with them now, but if Soderbergh decides to remake Vertigo or something I think I'd have to kill him.
ParileseMonster
10-25-2002, 08:32 PM
REMAKES ARE USELESS!!!
There was a time when some remakes were pretty good but now they suck horse dick. I want to know why in the hell they are remaking The StepFord Wives and I want to know why they are going to make it a comedy? Who the hell makes these decisions? It is a waste of time and money. It just ruins it. Why remake something that is already good you know if if aint broke dont fix it. Everyone has ran out of original ideas and concepts and this is the big problem. I can also understand trying to make something that may be dated more current or improved but I hate the fact that most remakes are marketed to appeal to the younger crowd, I am like excuse me people of all ages go to see movies and I dont care what you say young kids are not the only mass crowds to market and appeal to. I have yet to see a good remake in many years and I hate that my favorite movies are being remade into crap that will be made fun of and what purpose does that really serve?
Jeesh...Stepford Wives remakes as a comedy starring Nicole Kidman well I might as well just kill myself now.:p
Michael_myers
10-25-2002, 08:43 PM
Psycho.
Did we really need to see Vince Vaughn masturbating over that dyke Anne Heche?
Cyclonus
10-26-2002, 09:03 PM
What does everyone think of the proposed Scanners remake? Personally, I think there's room for improvement. I though the Cronenberg original was too slow and plodding for my liking, though I dig that Howard Shore score.
movielover-9
10-27-2002, 02:19 PM
Psycho was just a pointless scene for scene take on the original "Psycho". Too bad Alfred Hitchcock died before this dreck was made because I would have LOVED to see these people get sued for plaguerism.
But lemme just say that Steven Soderbergh's 2001 version of "Ocean's 11" was cooler and slicker than the original 1960 version.
Succubus
11-01-2002, 08:54 AM
Michael Caine must be a very popular man, as not only is 'The Italian Job' being remade, but there are also talks of an 'Alfie' remake starring...wait for it...Brad Pitt.
I don't think there are words, if I'm honest.
What I don't understand is how 'The Italian Job,' a film about all things British, can be Americanised. They all drive around in Minis- what about the remake? Cadillacs?
And no matter how talented an actor Brad Pitt is, I can't imagine playing super-suave charmer Alfie. It's just...wrong.
And don't get me started on 'The Ring.' I haven't seen it yet, but as a lover of the original, I really have a bad feeling about it...Naomi Watts may look very lovely, but after seeing 'Mulholland Drive,' I decided that she couldn't act herself out of a shallow grave.
Moviefan1234
11-02-2002, 06:13 AM
Believe me, Ms. Watts is quite a talented actress. She's has more than just her good looks going for her.
Asokan
12-09-2002, 02:17 AM
Let's keep it simple:
REMAKE flawed, lacking or simply bad movies.
DON'T REMAKE very good, great or classic movies.
Soderbergh was smart enough to the first thing when he made OCEAN'S ELEVEN. Dunno about SOLARIS yet, though.
freakandgeek
12-09-2002, 03:55 AM
i definately have to go with planet of the apes and psycho. man, i loved the original psycho, but, the new one really isn't anything like the old one, and they had everything (all angles and stuff) the same....i liked the actors in the new one, but it just didn't cut it.
and planet of the apes. my god!? what were they thinking. the remake was sooo awful. even tim roth didn't save it. erg
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