Winona The Musical?!?

[BorderEevilIII]

(dailydish-sfgate.com)
I would laugh my ass off if this musical goes ALL the waay and gets nominated in the Tony's.... :rolleyes:

WINONA'S SHOPLIFTING TRIAL TURNED INTO MUSICAL
Actress Winona Ryder's shoplifting woes have been put under the spotlight once more -- in the form of a musical.

Students at Point Loma High School in San Diego, Calif., have put together "Sticky Fingers: A Tale of Saks, Lies and Videotape." It satirizes the trial in which Ryder was convicted of taking about $6,000 worth of items from Saks Fifth Avenue in Beverly Hills.

The production is the culmination of a year's worth of work by several dozen students and is directed by teacher Larry Zeiger, who plays piano for the show and stars as interviewer Larry King.

The musical follows a missile-factory employee and tango dancer who travels to Rodeo Drive, where she has a fateful meeting with her idol, Ryder, at Saks. The department store donated shopping bags for the set.

Ryder was invited to see the show, which opens this week, but the school hasn't received a response.

[FeydRautha]

Oh man, that show just has to do a world tour. I'd pay Broadway prices to see that show. Can you imagine some of the numbers?

Winona's shopfloor solo:

I'm robbing, I'm stealing
Coz it's so appealing
Can't seem to help myself
No, honestly, Officer
That blouse was in my bag before
I'll just put it back on the shelf...

Or her defence lawyer's solo:

What kind of shark am I?
Must get her off
I wonder if she'd let me
Give her a boff...

Or the shop staff chorus finale at the end of Act 1:

We're selling, we're renewing
Our work we're through-and-throughing
Oh no - what's that movie star doing?
Winona! Winona!
Put those scissors down!
Winona! Winona!!
Put those tags bag, you stupid clown....

I could go on, but I won't... :D

[BorderEevilIII]

ROFL :D

[flowrchild]

Originally posted by FeydRautha
I could go on, but I won't... :D

Please do :D

[FeydRautha]

Originally posted by flowrchild
Please do :D

OK...just thought up a number for Act 2, to be sung by the doctor she got in trouble:

Winona - that stupid jack-off!
She went and got me struck off!
Because of hats and clothes she stole
My career's now down the hole
While she tries to be acquitted if she can
My reputation's circling the pan

All I did was prescribe some Vicodin
And perhaps a spot of Ridolin
To co-ordinate her panics,
I gave her a dose of Zannex
I thought she was my closest chum,
So I forwarded her Valium
With stolen Prada on her back
She's chowing down on my Prozac
Community Service is all she'll get
While she's flying high on Percoset

What can I do now, can't prescribe a pill
While her career gets stronger still
So it's South of the Border I must go
To start a practice in Mexico!!!!!!!!

I'll think up some more if anyone's interested. :)

[Annie Hall]

Feyd, you truly are a genius. Those lyrics are an absolute riot...


....I wouldn't turn down another helping of them :p

[Grebdron]

Amazing, Feyd. I wish I were creative.:(

[James Logan]

Originally posted by Annie Hall

....I wouldn't turn down another helping of them :p

Same here...bring 'em on, Feyd!

Jesus, this has been the funniest day on the boards in years. :)

[flowrchild]

*Round Of Applause*

Who needs to see crappy hollywood flicks when we got Feydrautha to entertain?

[FeydRautha]

* Feyd steps out on the final curtain to cries of 'Author! Author!' Bows, wipes a tear away, mouthes 'Thank you, darlings!' at the audience...tries to catch a bouquet of roses thrown onstage and gets whacked in the face instead... *

Thanks, guys! You're all too kind. And I bet you lot could think up some lyrics, too. I'll try to have another one for you later today, if you like. :)

[MovieMan75]

I think this is pretty funny...should attract a lot of people. It'd be great if Ryder went to see it. :D