Arrows Tomb Raider 2 Review!

[APzombie]

I have to say, this was his most honest piece of work yet, it captured all i needed to know about the film and more.

Arrow, my man, you never sease to amaze my dumb arse! ;)

[Salamar]

ARROW MAN!!! This was the best review i have ever read about this film!!! BRAVO APPLAUSE!!!!
If this is worst than the first one then it should be the scariest film ever made!!!

[Cronos]

Arrows best review and i completely agree with him, i think ill be skipping this at all costs

[Mr. Movie Man]

Excellent review! I plan to see this today, but I'll know to go in with VERY low expectations(always have).

[Kaos]

You have to love Arrow's painstaking attention to detail, the review said everything that could be said about the film. Great job Arrow!

[A.J. Hakari]

Even better than the PHONE BOOTH critique. Amazing piece of work...now I feel tempted to buy as many bottles of Aquafina as I can...:D

[Blue Ig]

Bravo, Arrow!

I cannot believe the number of critics that are actually giving this movie decent reviews! This movie was terrible and dull! Being a projectionist, I actually got paid to preview TR2 but still wanted to walk out half way. My co-workers and I started out heckling the film, but then we were so bored one of them fell asleep.

[KcMsterpce]

Uhm... where is this Arrow review of Tomb Raider 2?
All I see is Joblo's 4/10.

And I'm happy it got a bad rating, since I agree that it's a waste of celluloid, and an insult to the fanbase to make CRAPPY movies like this.

[CrazyKillah]

Bastard, he got me! Right before I double-clicked on it I was thinking, "Why the fuck would he review this?"... then BAM! I'm caught! :p

[Kaos]

Originally posted by KcMsterpce
Uhm... where is this Arrow review of Tomb Raider 2?
All I see is Joblo's 4/10.

And I'm happy it got a bad rating, since I agree that it's a waste of celluloid, and an insult to the fanbase to make CRAPPY movies like this.

Go here. (http://www.joblo.com/arrow/)

[Luke-Abbott]

Great review Arrow, your finest work yet :D

[KcMsterpce]

Oh, OK.

Yeah, that rox.

Very informative.

[JayWolf]

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...

He reviews the horrid CRITTERS 3, but he won't review this. I think this would be more worth the time myself.

Speaking of CRITTERS, review the fourth one already, Arrow! I actually found that one worth the time. Besides, it has Brad Dourif and Angela Bassett in it, and the Krites originally came from space anyway!

[Jake01]

DAMNIT I WISH I WOULD'VE KNOWN THAT BEFORE I SAW IT!!! Anyway, yes avoid it. Had to see it with my girl friend.

[slasherfan]

Originally posted by JayWolf
Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...

He reviews the horrid CRITTERS 3, but he won't review this. I think this would be more worth the time myself.



In all fairness Critter 3 'IS' a horror movie, Tomb Raider 2 isn't

[SykkBoy]

Originally posted by Adam J. Hakari
Even better than the PHONE BOOTH critique. Amazing piece of work...now I feel tempted to buy as many bottles of Aquafina as I can...:D

I don't think any review could ever top the Phone Booth review...until Arrow reviews "Ken Park" ;-))

but this one was pretty funny too

I wonder if Aquafina will now approach Arrow about sponsorship? ;-)

[slasherfan]

Have any of you thought that maybe film makers have feelings aswell and watching you lot diss their hard work like this is hurting their feelings, shame on all of you!

[Kaos]

Originally posted by slasherfan
Have any of you thought that maybe film makers have feelings aswell and watching you lot diss their hard work like this is hurting their feelings, shame on all of you!

Yes, well, this is our opinion, which we are entitled to. It's no worse than what many critics have been saying, and we don't even get paid.

[Sad man]

Hilarious...Arrow you're so cool.

[movies35]

http://www.joblo.com/arrow/arrowimages2/arrowtombraider2.jpg

Best review I ever read!

[ERIN_LoJ]

LOL Cute

[The Arrow]

Well I'm happy that most got that it was "a joke", maybe one in poor taste (nothing wrong with that) but still a joke.

At the same time I did see Tomb Raiders 2 and it was the biggest waste of 12 Bucks ever. Is it so hard to do a good film about a hot chick with ample cleavage, sporting two guns and kicking ass? I guess it is.

And to address Slasherfan, if the filmmakers can't take criticisim, or pot shots (be it constructive or not) then they should get out the biz. It comes with the territory, like it or not.

Later guys!

Arrow

[KcMsterpce]

Originally posted by The Arrow
At the same time I did see Tomb Raiders 2 and it was the biggest waste of 12 Bucks ever.

Ouch. 12 bucks. That's Canadian bucks at least, right?

Twelve American dollars for Tomb Raider 2? Man, I better get some sucky sucky for that! :p ;)

PS - I mean that I should get a really big lollipop for the sick-minded readers out there.

[TheAxeGrinder]

Arrow hits the cop on the head with the (back) of the hammer this time. The first movie had nothing to it, and neither does this one. The only difference being that now the fanbase for the Tomb Raider franchise is smaller than 3 years ago, and even then, it was waning. Give it up, Paramount, and go back to trying to figure out why people hate your DVDs and the latest Star Trek movies.

[JayWolf]

Originally posted by TheAxeGrinder
Arrow hits the cop on the head with the (back) of the hammer this time. The first movie had nothing to it, and neither does this one. The only difference being that now the fanbase for the Tomb Raider franchise is smaller than 3 years ago, and even then, it was waning. Give it up, Paramount, and go back to trying to figure out why people hate your DVDs and the latest Star Trek movies.

Hey! Come on, man! Now bail off of STAR TREK: NEMESIS. That was pretty good, in my opinion.

[ANTBond007]

You hated Terminator 3 and liked Star Trek: Nemesis?

[Cyclonus]

Originally posted by The Arrow
Well At the same time I did see Tomb Raiders 2 and it was the biggest waste of 12 Bucks ever. Is it so hard to do a good film about a hot chick with ample cleavage, sporting two guns and kicking ass? I guess it is.

As far as giving it a star rating, what do you think it's worth, (*) or (1/2*)?

[slasherfan]

Erm, I was being sarcastic, I can't believe some of you though I was serious!!!

[Kaos]

Originally posted by slasherfan
Erm, I was being sarcastic, I can't believe some of you though I was serious!!!

Add a smiley next time. It's a little hard to tell how serious someone is if you can't see them, so give us a visual clue.;)

[pyscho dude]

Arrow's review was brilliant . He used specific detail with lots of photos and audio clips. If you can't tell I'm being a smart ass but it was funny. Man that got me by surprise. I wasn't expecting it.

[MacReady]

Originally posted by KcMsterpce
Ouch. 12 bucks. That's Canadian bucks at least, right?

Twelve American dollars for Tomb Raider 2? Man, I better get some sucky sucky for that! :p ;)

PS - I mean that I should get a really big lollipop for the sick-minded readers out there.

It gets worse if you want a snack. It cost close to four dollars for a small popcorn, they only have the large sized candy-bars as opposed to the regular ones, their selection is terrible (only hersey chocolates as candy-bars. I think this is some kind of product placement deal) and their smallest drinks are just about the same size as most large drinks in fast-food restaurants. They also come into the theaters and push their high-priced food in case you managed to try and avoid them at the stand. My friend who wathced a movie with me said he would've gone without eating anything had it not been for that tray. Plus they won't show anything that isn't 100% a big maistream mindless studio movie. I really wanted to see Spider when I visited. Anyway I'm getting off topic.

[Mr Bones]

Man, that was a good review lol. From now on, just review crappy movies like this. Saves us all time and money, cause I know The Arrow has the same taste I do in horror/scifi so its all the same thoughts i'd have on a movie. Bravo and kudos arrow, we couldn't be here without you.

[X-Nightcrawler]

I feel bad now...I loved the first and now I have zero expectations for part 2...*hangs head*

[slasherfan]

Here's my 2 cents for anyone who cares.

http://smilies.crowd9.com/cwm/cwm/piss2.gifhttp://www.joblo.com/arrow/arrowimages2/mainarrowtombraider2.jpghttp://smilies.crowd9.com/cwm/cwm/piss.gif

[Mr Bones]

hahah nice, I saw this movie today, mainly cause I didn't have to pay for it and there was nothing else to do. Its like they knew people were gonna go see it based on the title and first movie so they made it in a rush, with several plotholes and endless boredom ensued. I actually was gonna walk out half way, but I kept falling asleep! lol. Definetly not even worth the 3.45 my friend payed for it! Damnit, now I can't wait for a good movie like Freddy vs. Jason, I won't be going to the theater till then now, i'm scurred away!

[myersfan31]

I loved Tomb Raider, it was fantastic. If he doesn't like it, I don't really care, I mean, he DID give Jason X a quality review.

[X-Nightcrawler]

Originally posted by myersfan31
I loved Tomb Raider, it was fantastic. If he doesn't like it, I don't really care, I mean, he DID give Jason X a quality review. Wow, you and your random hatred for all things Jason X....lol, to each his own.

[Kaos]

Originally posted by myersfan31
I loved Tomb Raider, it was fantastic. If he doesn't like it, I don't really care, I mean, he DID give Jason X a quality review.

It's all in how you look at it. I loved Jason X, and have had the misfortune to see TR2. I got in for free, a friend paid for me, and I still think the price was too much!

[myersfan31]

Originally posted by X-Nightcrawler
Wow, you and your random hatred for all things Jason X....lol, to each his own.
Well it's just the fact that a VERY quality movie gets such bashing for no reason, while Jason X gets good reviews when, in every way, it's poorer. :o

[Kaos]

Originally posted by myersfan31
Well it's just the fact that a VERY quality movie gets such bashing for no reason, while Jason X gets good reviews when, in every way, it's poorer. :o

Again, that's your opinion. I've seen both, and feel that Jason X was FAR better, that's my opinion. You might feel that Jason X is the poorer movie, but that's not a fact.

[slasherfan]

I also thought Jason X was very good, it will get NO pissing monkeys from me. It's ALOT better then Halloween 8.

[myersfan31]

Originally posted by Kaos
Again, that's your opinion. I've seen both, and feel that Jason X was FAR better, that's my opinion. You might feel that Jason X is the poorer movie, but that's not a fact.
Well, I guess not, but the script, directing, acting, score, everything was better done. But I guess if you prefer some 80s slasher killing people in space over a woman trying to save humanity while locating the evolution of the world..That's your opinion.;)

[slasherfan]

Originally posted by myersfan31
But I guess if you prefer some 80s slasher killing people in space over a woman trying to save humanity while locating the evolution of the world..That's your opinion.;)

you got that right!!!

[The Arrow]

Originally posted by myersfan31
Well, I guess not, but the script, directing, acting, score, everything was better done. But I guess if you prefer some 80s slasher killing people in space over a woman trying to save humanity while locating the evolution of the world..That's your opinion.;)

At least Jason X didn't pretend to be something it wasn't; its a slasher flick, thats it, dig it or dont, it was what it was.

While Tomb Raider 2 The Cradle of my Ass, actually tried to come off as being an intelligent film when it should've been a fun times action flick. LOL! It failed more miserably at it than a coke whore trying NOT to suck dick for coin at a nunnery. The script for TR2 was a joke on 3 legs.

But thats just me, you dig TR2 good for you man. I'll take Jason X over that piece of utter, hack excrement any day.

[ANTBond007]

I'm not really a fan of either film, but Jason X definitely didn't have me feeling very tired half way through.

[myersfan31]

Well this is stupid to argue about. I loved Tomb Raider because it was different from all the other summer movies. It was adventerous, and didn't rely on stupid car chases for the movie. I guess I just loved all the historical part of the story and the possibility that it's true, or at least realistic. I was just really interested to see what Arrow had to say, and it was really nothing.

[Requiem-for-a-Dream]

Originally posted by The Arrow
At least Jason X didn't pretend to be something it wasn't; its a slasher flick, thats it, dig it or dont, it was what it was.

While Tomb Raider 2 The Cradle of my Ass, actually tried to come off as being an intelligent film when it should've been a fun times action flick. LOL! It failed more miserably at it than a coke whore trying NOT to suck dick for coin at a nunnery. The script for TR2 was a joke on 3 legs.

But thats just me, you dig TR2 good for you man. I'll take Jason X over that piece of utter, hack excrement any day.

I agree with all of what you've said but Arrow, you've reviewed lots of horrible movies, one's that have to be worse than Tomb Raider 2. Why pick this one out of a huge barrel and decide not to review it? I was actually looking forward to reading your thoughts on the film. Surely Teenage Caveman was much worse, why not just give the finger to that movie?

Matt

[JayWolf]

Originally posted by Requiem-for-a-Dream
I agree with all of what you've said but Arrow, you've reviewed lots of horrible movies, one's that have to be worse than Tomb Raider 2. Why pick this one out of a huge barrel and decide not to review it? I was actually looking forward to reading your thoughts on the film. Surely Teenage Caveman was much worse, why not just give the finger to that movie?

Matt

I have to go with Matt on this one, Arrow. I would have liked to have seen your review instead of your misplaced advertisiment for Aquafina.

As for ANTBond007, yes I did liked STAR TREK: NEMESIS. Why? Because I actually got a story and characters along with the action sequences underlining the movie (plus, they killed off Data, man!) where all T3 shoved down my throat was nothing but eye candy, action sequences, and too much underlining comedy for my tastes, with everything else in the backseat. Only good thing for me was Arnold, and his character was only there for the ride. Sorry, but I'm going with NEMESIS on this one. Besides, I actually got STAR TREK when I saw NEMESIS where I got a movie trying to wow everyone over with just action and eye candy in T3, I didn't get an actual TERMINATOR film. Hell, the part that intriguied me the most (where T-800 gets his system corrupted) only lasted for about a minute! to me, there felt like no absolute reason why T3 even needed to be made because nothing really got evolved or resolved. It was just one big action scene to me trying to look like it had a story.

[slasherfan]

But TOmb Raider 2 isn't a horror movie!!!

[countchocula]

Originally posted by Requiem-for-a-Dream
I agree with all of what you've said but Arrow, you've reviewed lots of horrible movies, one's that have to be worse than Tomb Raider 2. Why pick this one out of a huge barrel and decide not to review it? I was actually looking forward to reading your thoughts on the film. Surely Teenage Caveman was much worse, why not just give the finger to that movie?

Keep in mind that this is a horror site. TR2 isn't a horror movie, so those who were looking forward to reading Arrow's viewpoints on the film should be grateful that he spent the time to post the gag review. It was fucking hilarious, and I'd love for him to do this for every fluff piece that comes out, if only to warn unsuspecting moviegoers.

[JayWolf]

Originally posted by countchocula
Keep in mind that this is a horror site. TR2 isn't a horror movie, so those who were looking forward to reading Arrow's viewpoints on the film should be grateful that he spent the time to post the gag review. It was fucking hilarious, and I'd love for him to do this for every fluff piece that comes out, if only to warn unsuspecting moviegoers.

Like that ever stopped him from reviewing films that weren't horror related such as TRANSFORMERS: THE MOVIE, ATTACK OF THE CLONES, FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING, ROLLERBALL, etc.? He's reviewed movies with fantasy/action/sic-fi genre in them. Besides, he doesn't neccessarily have to do the review on this website. I mean, his does reviews for movies outside this genre, too. Look at the bottom of the Reviews page.

[countchocula]

Could it be possible that he just didn't want to review it? It's his site after all, and he's not obligated to review every blockbuster that's jettisoned his way. The gag review was in good fun, and that's all there is to it. I'm sure that he has more important things to worry about (covering the Fantasia line-up for instance).

[slasherfan]

Originally posted by countchocula
I'm sure that he has more important things to worry about (covering the Fantasia line-up for instance).

Don't you mean booze and hookers? ;)

[JayWolf]

Originally posted by countchocula
Could it be possible that he just didn't want to review it? It's his site after all, and he's not obligated to review every blockbuster that's jettisoned his way. The gag review was in good fun, and that's all there is to it. I'm sure that he has more important things to worry about (covering the Fantasia line-up for instance).

True, but Matt still has a point. Arrow has reviewed films much worse than this (like CRITTERS 3) and I'd actually like to know why he didn't like it. The gag was funny, but I'm not satisfied review wise, though. I just wanted to see his thoughts on the film as well, and what I got was a review equal to the mentality of a narrow minded middle school kid. Sure, it was funny, but you get my picture.

[countchocula]

Originally posted by JayWolf
The gag was funny, but I'm not satisfied review wise, though.

That's because it's not a review; it's a joke. I'm sure that Arrow isn't trying to pass the joke off as a review. He won't be reviewing the film, so let's move on with our lives. If you want to know why he loathed TR2, read Joblo's review, as they seem to share each other's sentiments on this one.

[JayWolf]

Originally posted by countchocula
That's because it's not a review; it's a joke. I'm sure that Arrow isn't trying to pass the joke off as a review. He won't be reviewing the film, so let's move on with our lives. If you want to know why he loathed TR2, read Joblo's review, as they seem to share each other's sentiments on this one.

Ok, whatever.

[The Arrow]

I never intended to review TR2; but after I saw it, the pic gag popped in my head and I thought it would be funny....well to some anyways...

Its not a review; its a joke...poke-poke, nudge-nudge, laugh -laugh...nothing more, nothing less.

[Mike]

Originally posted by The Arrow
Is it so hard to do a good film about a hot chick with ample cleavage, sporting two guns and kicking ass? I guess it is.

No, it's not. Although the people behind the Tomb Raider movies seem to think it is. I remember enjoying BARB WIRE as a guilty pleasure, but even that seems like an actual "good" film next to the Tomb Raider flicks.

[Requiem-for-a-Dream]

Originally posted by countchocula
Keep in mind that this is a horror site. TR2 isn't a horror movie, so those who were looking forward to reading Arrow's viewpoints on the film should be grateful that he spent the time to post the gag review. It was fucking hilarious, and I'd love for him to do this for every fluff piece that comes out, if only to warn unsuspecting moviegoers.

I know this is a horror site but Arrow reviews none horror films all the time, I was expressing my opinion, that's it that's all. Besides the fact that I was addressing Arrow. I personally prefer a funny review (like that of Teenage Caveman) for a bad film than a picture giving the finger. Just because a movie sucked, doesn't mean that the review should be ignored. It's an action/sci-fi piece just like Terminator 1, 2, and 3 (the first having more horror elements than the second two installments). It's mindless entertainment but that doesn't mean that I wouldn't enjoy a review for it. All the picture did was get my hopes up then crash them. I get the joke but I guess I really don't see the point. I have a great sense of humour (to those who know me) but for fans of the site who wanted to read a funny review bashing the movie (like Jaywolf and I), this was just a disappointment.

In the end though, it doesn't really matter, its just too bad I didn't get the review.

Matt

[Requiem-for-a-Dream]

Originally posted by countchocula
That's because it's not a review; it's a joke. I'm sure that Arrow isn't trying to pass the joke off as a review. He won't be reviewing the film, so let's move on with our lives. If you want to know why he loathed TR2, read Joblo's review, as they seem to share each other's sentiments on this one.

Really? Where's the picture with the middle finger from Joblo? At least he took the time to review the movie. Whatever, it's Arrow's choice what to review I just wish I could have gotten an intelligent and hilarious rip on the film instead of the picture.

Matt

[countchocula]

Wow. I really don't understand this backlash of sorts. To me, the picture was just as funny as the Phone Booth review. I'm gathering that the only reason why Joblo reviewed the movie and Arrow didn't is because reviewing the film was higher on his priority list than on Arrow's. It's as simple as that. It's fine if you didn't find the picture to be terribly humorous, but why drag this out?

[Requiem-for-a-Dream]

I'm done.

Matt

[Kaos]

Arrow's site. Arrow's rules. I don't think he owes us an explaination for why he decided to do it(although he did give us one. Thanks Arrow, I laughed).

[Elgyn]

You know, they say the best reviews are short and to the point!

Angelina Jolie is an overrated SLUT. She did NOT deserve her Oscar (as if the Oscars mean anything anymore anyways).
She`s the biggest publicity whore since Courtney Love.
PUT THAT IN YER PIPE AND SMOKE IT ANGELINA!

I liked Arrow`s gag review. It told me everything I needed to know. Of course, keep in mind I had absolutley NO intention of seeing "TR2" in the first place (not even for free).:D

[Kaos]

Calmly Elgyn, calmly. I'm not her biggest fan, but I did enjoy her performance in Hackers. It's fine to insult her, but the "PUT THAT IN YER PIPE AND SMOKE IT!" comment, might be a bit much. It could be mistaken that you were directing it at your fellow schmoes. Peace dude.:)

[Elgyn]

Originally posted by Kaos

It's fine to insult her, but the "PUT THAT IN YER PIPE AND SMOKE IT!" comment, might be a bit much. It could be mistaken that you were directing it at your fellow schmoes.


I always say that (in real life, not here on the boards so much).
'Put that in yer pipe and smoke it!' I mean.
I just think it`s a funny saying, it doesn`t seem insulting to me.
Next time I`ll add a smiley!:D

[myersfan31]

Angelina Jolie is an overrated SLUT. She did NOT deserve her Oscar (as if the Oscars mean anything anymore anyways).
Did you even see Girl, Interrupted? She very much deserved an award for her part.

And she's not a slut. Have you been reading about her lately? She's a totally nice person, and she's no fame whore. Just because you don't like someone, doesn't make them a slut.

[JayWolf]

Originally posted by countchocula
Wow. I really don't understand this backlash of sorts. To me, the picture was just as funny as the Phone Booth review. I'm gathering that the only reason why Joblo reviewed the movie and Arrow didn't is because reviewing the film was higher on his priority list than on Arrow's. It's as simple as that. It's fine if you didn't find the picture to be terribly humorous, but why drag this out?

What backlash? We're just giving our opinions, man. Anyway, I already gave this up.

[Elgyn]

Originally posted by myersfan31

Did you even see Girl, Interrupted? She very much deserved an award for her part.


Sorry I don`t agree. I didn`t like the movie or her performence very much.


And she's not a slut.
She's a totally nice person, and she's no fame whore.


Ehhhhh I vividly remember her telling the world that she just got done giving Billy Bob a bj in their limo at the MTV Music Awards.
Now I`m not saying that giving your husband (at the time) a bj makes her a slut........but telling the world about it?
That`s what I call a "slut" AND a "fame whore".

But hey man, this is just me bitching about a Hollywood actress that neither of us will ever meet. I hope this isn`t a problem.:confused: :(
:p
:eek:

[myersfan31]

Well considering at the time, they were husband and wife, I think they can do whatever they want if they like each other. The "BJ in a limo" wasn't made publicly either. That was two years ago also, so if you're going to hold this against the person forever, do what you want then.

But I don't think we really need to argue this :)

[Elgyn]

Originally posted by myersfan31

But I don't think we really need to argue this :)

Neither do I. Argument over.
Peace out!:p :) :p :) :p :)

[The Arrow]

wow...all this for a "gag" pic...who knew?

topic closed