What do you think?

[Begbie2004]

I just want some feedback on this movie idea I have.

The story takes place in 1965. A gangster from the soviet union named Alex has to flee the country after killing a rival gang member. He escapes with the help of his brother and soon makes his way into France. On a train to Paris, he meets Jean, a beautiful young french woman. Alex knows French so he starts up a conversation with her. He immediately takes a liking to her brilliant charm and quick wit. She also shows a certain liking to Alex. They arrange to have dinner at a cafe that Jean likes. There he learns more about her and what she likes. They talk about life, philosophy, politics, music, and movies. They have a lot in common. After a pretty romantic evening together, Alex and Jean head to her apartment where they engage in passionate sex. For the next few days they continue having sex and getting to know each other. Alex checks with a friend of his fathers living in Paris who says that a mysterious man is in paris looking for a russian. Alex develops a friendship with this man who tells him a lot about his father because Alex was only three when his father died. Jean introduces Alex to her parents and family and they take a liking to him. All this time he hasn't told her about his true profession, going under the guise of a student travelling abroad. She has her doubts but they are too much in love. In the end the mysterious man makes his appearance as the brother of the man he killed back in the soviet union. There is a little struggle and Alex kills the man only to be shot dead by the man before dying. Both the men lay dead and Jean cries over the body of Alex. -fade to black-

[XvoorheesX]

It's not bad, but that's not nearly enough t fill two hours.

[NobodySpecial]

I didn't make it past the second sentence.

You do understand that a person living in Russia in 1965 was actually living in the Soviet Union? And you do realize that fleeing the country was a very, very big deal back then? And of course, you must also realize that gang activity during those years was far from vibrant, what with the government and their secret police lording over every single man, woman, and child?

[przybyla]

The dinner scene would be boring. Politics, religion, snooze. Woh gives a damned. Movies are made for visual effects. There is nothing visual about 2 people eating dinner and shooting the shit. Scenes like that should only last one or two pages at most, unless you feel your dialogue can make up for the boring surroundings.

[Begbie2004]

Escaping russia was very hard back then but through the right government connections you could get out of Moscow and into Poland and then Germany. As for crime, the russian Mafia back then was the most powerful economic power. It was eighty percent of Russias economy. The communist party itself was the russian mafia. You don't believe me then read any history book. I am russian and I happen to know this as a fact.

[Begbie2004]

And as far as the secret police are concerned, there were no more secret police. They dispersed after the death of Stalin in 1953. There was the KGB but they weren't as savage as Stalin and his secret police. They didn't kill people for no pure reason. They tried them in a court of their peers. So I don't understand what you mean NobodySpecial because as far as history knows it, escape out of Russia was possible but very hard.

[NobodySpecial]

Originally posted by Begbie2004
So I don't understand what you mean NobodySpecial because as far as history knows it, escape out of Russia was possible but very hard.
Because what you posted completely and thoroughly ignores all of this. No where in what you wrote did you even hint at putting the events of the story in the context of when they are occurring.

Aside from that, making glaring mistakes like calling it Russia instead of the USSR immediately worries me about the authenticity of your story. I'm not the one who needs to be reading history books, because I'm not the one writing this, but I can still spot a boo-boo a mile away.

[Ronaldinho]

Yeah. I won't claim to be a history buff, but I actually do know enough about this one to come down on NS's side.

You look at people who defected in the post-Stalin era, people like Victor Korchnoi-- who only managed to do it because he was a sports star who got to travel a lot (and even still had KGB minders he had to dodge).

You read some of the classic get-out-of-the-Soviet-Union literature (particualrly LeCarre, who had a lot of experience in the European intelligence community) and you realize that even for politically connected types, it was not easy. On the contrary, it was fraught with danger. People died.

Getting into Germany from Poland didn't solve anything--because you were then in East Germany, which DID still have secret police (the Stasi) and getting from East Germany to West Germany was extremely difficult. Nor was going through Poland even a rational choice.

The logical path--pre prague spring, at least, would have been USSR-Czechoslovakia-Austria. But that was not an easy path, either, particularly for non-Czechs (who were generally afforded a little more travel lattitude, for a little while at least).

In any event, there's a larger point here, so rather than get bogged down in details, you need to ask yourself this:

Why make something a period piece unless you have to? Making something a period piece instantly adds a hell of a lot to the budget, creates (as this thread illustrates) dozens of mistakes you can make.

[The UserName]

If you ask me, it lacks of conflict and direction. Like, at frist I thought this would be a gangster movie, blood murder violence. Then he just starts fucking all day and falling in love? Totally forgetting about his "past." Finally, in the end, the gang boss is back. The conflict isn't strong enough if you ask me, no real climax. Lol, i dunno what im saying