Have you had to sit through AX-EM (2002)?

[the dead one]

some spoilers...like it really matters!!!



Tag line: It Was Supposed To Be A Weekend Get-Away Until The Horror Began!

Plot Outline: A weekend retreat at a remote cabin in the woods for a group of childhood pals turns into a terrifying fight for survival, as a former friend whose family was killed years earlier comes along looking for revenge.

Dont let the box art fool you!!! A highly original premise (cough)!! This flick defies descripition, what a total piece of SHIT! Painfully bad doesnt begin to explain this drek, absolutely worst of the low-rent movies! Made by a guy named Michael Mfume...What is a real hoot is that the director's father, Kweisi Mfume was a U.S. Congressman, and former head of the NAACP! It features an afro-american cast of who's who, Here is an example of what I had to witness: when the so-called killer crashes through door, he is carrying a maschete( I thought this flick was called ax-em?) a young man turns to the camera and begins to buck his eyes, and make his ears wiggle...what the fuck?:rolleyes: Setting race relations back to "King of the Zomibies" with the late great Mantan Moreland! Has anyone else seen this shit box yet?...talk to me!

[XpatrickX]

I was warned ahead of time and therefore missed this crap =)

[IamNoOne666]

The title got my attention then I turned it over and put it right back down. I'd be interested to see if this is worse then Bloody Murder, cause that might be the worst movie ever.

[the dead one]

Hate to disappoint you I amNoOne666...BUT NO WAY!!
Bloody Murder cant even come close to how awful Ax-Em is!!!
Here is another example of what takes place in this(cough) movie...you can see this fat guy holding the clapboard in the background in one scene- another thing...at one point you can see the (cough) cast huddle in the bushes, while the director off camera says(you can actually hear this!) You guys ready? Ok, GO! Un-fucking real!!! :rolleyes: some editing huh? My friends have made BETTER BACKYARD films!!
Do I have to continue??

Tell you what, I think everyone here should see this...strictly for laughs!! :D
a VAT of alcohol will help!!:)

This (cough) movie makes guys like Ed Wood and AL Adamson look like epic masters of film!:D

[IamNoOne666]

you know what Dead One, you just convinced me to go rent this movie, I have got to see it.

[the dead one]

As crazy as it's going to sound coming from me, in some twisted way. I think that all of you guys would get a kick out of how bad this flick(and I use that term loosely!) REALLY is!

If anything you will get some major laughs out of it, plus it makes you feel that just about anyone can get a movie made and distributed on video and dvd these days.

Ax-em...play it at your next party! Your friends will howl with Laughter! :D

Just make sure that they are good and liquored up!!!

[the dead one]

Hey, IamNoOne666 let me know what you think!
Later
:D

[Jason Voorhees]

This isn't really about "best, worst, vs., and lists," so I'm gonna move this over to Past Horror.

And no, I've never seen this flick. But I want to now.

[the dead one]

Sorry about that Jason, guess I should have given it more thought...Oh, let me know what you think about Ax-Em...if you get around to it!!! Just remeber what I said about the booze!

Thanks!
:D

[slasherfan]

I've heard it's awful.

[LoomisFan]

From the box, it sounded half-way decent. I turned it off about 30 seconds in. Now, I'm seriously considering checking it out. That, and Bloody Murder, which I'd really like to see, as well. I want to see their badness for myself. I believe people when they say that these films are crap, but I still want to experience them for myself.

[ParileseMonster]

Ok where the hell is Matt? :D

Yep Ive seen this piece of stupid shit and I sat through it and it fucking sucked! It is worse than Draniac hell even MonsTurd had more entertainment value. I would much rather watch Wood Chipper Massacre than this Axe Em crap any time!

[the dead one]

Wood Chipper Massacre? Havent seen that one, sounds like a real winner!:D

My main issue with Ax-Em is the fact that, it actually saw distribution.
How can anything like this make it to video shelves?
Like I stated earlier, my friends have made better backyard productions!! It should give many of us hope... because if Michael Mfume, can find somebody insane enough to get his movie onto video store shelves.:rolleyes:

Then every want to be filmmaker running around with a video camera,
has more than a shot at getting distribution!

[killuminati003]

Originally posted by XpatrickX
I was warned ahead of time and therefore missed this crap =)

me to....i saw it at my local Movie Gallery, and thought about picking it up (before i knew anything about it). but after reading some reviews on the net, i decided against it

[Elgyn]

Originally posted by the dead one

Here is another example of what takes place in this(cough) movie...you can see this fat guy holding the clapboard in the background in one scene-


Oh, MAN! Now I NEED to see this, just for that one scene!
That would be funny if in the end credits it said:

"Fat Guy.......Himself"

[the dead one]

Now thats the spirit Elgyn...this is the type of tripe that should be viewed by yourself and 10 of your closest buds...speaking of...
a little "Bud" will help! :D

[Bear]

Originally posted by killuminati003
me to....i saw it at my local Movie Gallery, and thought about picking it up (before i knew anything about it). but after reading some reviews on the net, i decided against it

You got a Movie Gallery in your town? Me too! It's selling all their used VHSs though, so they may be going out of buisness.

[Bear]

I've seen Woodchipper Massacre before, it's not the best shot-on-video movie but it has some entertainment value.

[LoomisFan]

Originally posted by Bear
You got a Movie Gallery in your town? Me too! It's selling all their used VHSs though, so they may be going out of buisness.
They are actually doing that because they are phasing out VHS. They are starting to carry only DVDs. I believe that every Movie Gallery is doing this. A lot of other rental chains, too. I just went by our movie gallery and picked up a couple of the Prophecy flicks, as well as Friday the 13th Part 5 for about $12 altogether. I'm sorry to see VHS go...
*Salute*

[mary lou 102]

I rented this knowing it would suck. What I din't know was that it would be the worst thing I have ever had to sit through. It wasn't even good on a guilty pleasure level. It was pure shit. It had no blood, no nudity(with the cast it had, I was glad), and the most retarted script ever. It was reminisent of a shitty movie I made when I was 10. Even the way it was shot looked like my shitty movie.

There is also an absurd scene of stupid dancing that is 10 minutes long and is the most pointless thing ever. There is also a scene where the one white girl keep sfalling(about 15 times in a period of a minute). She is walking in the woods, she fall, gets up, 1 sec. later she falls agian, and on and on!




AVoid at all costs. Avoid it as if Samara was in it and was going to kill you. It's that bad!

[killuminati003]

Originally posted by Bear
You got a Movie Gallery in your town? Me too! It's selling all their used VHSs though, so they may be going out of buisness.

its selling all of them?...the on here sales used VHS tapes and DVDs ,..sometimes

[killuminati003]

Originally posted by LoomisFan
They are actually doing that because they are phasing out VHS. They are starting to carry only DVDs. I believe that every Movie Gallery is doing this. A lot of other rental chains, too. I just went by our movie gallery and picked up a couple of the Prophecy flicks, as well as Friday the 13th Part 5 for about $12 altogether. I'm sorry to see VHS go...
*Salute*

realy dude?...that would be cool if my Local Movie Gallery started selling theres....i would pick me up some

[Bear]

Here's what I have to say for Ax'Em.........

No FUCKIN' blood + No FUCKIN' gore + No FUCKIN' nudity + No FUCKIN' entertainment value = NO FUCKIN' GOOD!!!!!!!!!!

[Complecks]

I havn't seen this movie, i don't want to either, well maybe if i get it for free when i rent another...

Anyway, Bear, whats that avatar? i mean, is it from a film or what? It's very cool.

And if this AX-EM is a horror movie, does it actually have any scares or even parts that's meant to scare you?

[Bear]

Ax'Em is just another one of those shitty highly original "friends go to cabin resort to camp and maniac mangles them up with a twist of revenge" tone. That's why there were so many ripoffs in the 80's. Cos they were smart enough to know that a highly original movie is a horrible movie. Originality is good, but the shit today pushes too far, creating dumbass and shitty plot twists, causing it to choke on it's own fuckin' dick. And the avatar, I don't know what it is. I found on a site and it was originally a motion clip showing the head being sliced all the way by the knife with some blood squirting, but it was too big so I had to reduce it and there was no more motion to it. But in motion and still, it's awesome.

[Complecks]

There's still been some cool movies using the remote cabin setting. The evil dead, the burning, friday 13th..

And as you were saying about the shit today, mainstream movies are just shit spurted out by big companys to make profit. If you want some good stuff nowadays it mostly gonna be independent.

Was the avatar off Ogrish? i'm sure i've seen it. The guys there have some sick avatars. Sick in a good way :cool:

Apart from that one guy who has the avatar of the woman cutting through a guys dick. :mad:

[Bear]

No it was someone else's avatar on the sleepawaycampffilms.com forum.

[the dead one]

Originally Posted By Complecks
if this AX-EM is a horror movie, does it actually have any scares or even parts that's meant to scare you?

Hey, Comps' If you take a gander at the beginning of this thread,
you'll have your answer... :D

[normanbatesjr]

I bet that The Fear sucks worse than both of those.

[the dead one]

Than take the Pepsi challange and rent Ax-Em...
If you dare...Heh,heh,heh!:)

[The_Driller_Killer]

When I first saw the cover art for this movie, I thought "Ohhhh man, I have GOT to see this movie!!!" I was full on ready to special order it and everything, being the enormous slasher fan that I am. God bless my friend Tony who gave me all the horrific details before I whipped out the credit card and threads like this really, REALLY make me happy I saved my money. I may end up just renting it sometime just to see how bad it truly is for myself. And hey, here's a little nugget of info I just picked up on handy dandy IMDB. The budget for this thing was actually $650. That explains a lot...

[the dead one]

Originally posted by The_Driller_Killer
When I first saw the cover art for this movie, I thought "Ohhhh man, I have GOT to see this movie!!!" I was full on ready to special order it and everything, being the enormous slasher fan that I am. God bless my friend Tony who gave me all the horrific details before I whipped out the credit card and threads like this really, REALLY make me happy I saved my money. I may end up just renting it sometime just to see how bad it truly is for myself. And hey, here's a little nugget of info I just picked up on handy dandy IMDB. The budget for this thing was actually $650. That explains a lot...

I know what you mean killer...As to the cover, I felt the same way you did. But I was just renting it...Thank God! Which I highly recommend doing strictly for laughs!
:D

[Bear]

Watching Ax'Em is almost as bad than having your face slapped around by a cum spewing dick. Yeah. U would think it's cool, but guess what, it's not.

[the dead one]

Originally posted by Bear
Watching Ax'Em is almost as bad than having your face slapped around by a cum spewing dick. Yeah. U would think it's cool, but guess what, it's not.

Cum spewing dick? Where have you been spending your nights?

[Bear]

What I said about the nudity, I was really happy it didn't have any, that waas one ugly ass cast.