"im a movie genius!"

[jackson13]

No you're not you psycho!

I just returned from my local library, where I had to endure listening to a mother/daughter combo whilst I searched for DVD's to watch. The mother was a self-proclaimed Movieologist, or so she thought. I seriously almost started laughing out loud over how dumb this woman really was when it came to movies, and how she just kept going on and on about everything like she was trying to impress people. One of the comments went like this (and yes, this is word for word):

Daughter: "Is Princess Bride any good?"
Mother: "Yeah, its a comedy, its got Steve Martin in it. Anything with Steve Martin is a comedy."
Daughter: "Mom, it doesnt say who's in it."
Mother: "Trust me, its Steve Martin. Lemme see it. *takes it from daughter* You're right, it doesnt say. Steve Martin isn't in it. Who is Cary Elwes? This isnt a comedy. It cant be."

Here's another:

Daughter: "Rudy. Oh, wait, Rudy: The Rudy Guilani Story. I thought this was that football movie."
Mother: "It is, that was that kids name."
Daughter: "Mom, it says its the story of the mayor of New York City."
Mother: "The mayor of New York City is named Rudolph. *then it hits her* Oh, Rudy is short for Rudolph. Maybe it is about him. *grabs DVD* Thats not him. Who is James Woods? This must not be about him cause he'd be in it. Do they have "Rudy"? I think its the best sports movie ever made."

By that time I had to walk away. I couldn't take her outright stupidity anymore. I had the movies I wanted and had to leave before an embolism popped in my brain from holding back laughter/frustration.

Anyways, I've had this happen before. I must have a knack for running into people who think they are geniuses when it comes to movies and then turn out to not know Jack Shit about the slightest thing. Stupid people should be prohibited from going out in public.

[RogueSpear]

Originally posted by jackson13
Stupid people should be prohibited from going out in public.
That's why it's called "public". Everyone's allowed in.

Besides, if people want to act they are all knowing when it comes to movies let them. Seriously, how could this bother you that much? Just ignore them and go on with your life.

[TheDeadWalk]

Originally posted by RogueSpear
That's why it's called "public". Everyone's allowed in.

Besides, if people want to act they are all knowing when it comes to movies let them. Seriously, how could this bother you that much? Just ignore them and go on with your life.


If we all went by that logic, then this section of the boards would go straight to shit, and then I would have to resort to firebombing countries like the Phillipines to get it out of my system.

Its either rant and rave, or sayanra President Arroyo.


Actually I was getting irked by a know it all at one of the local video stores who was laughing at the name "Bubba Ho-Tep", which must obviously suck and be extremelly low budget because SHE'D never heard of it. Fuckin bitch.

[Mahab]

And just think, she has at least one child.

This is on par with a guy I overheard at Wal-Mart. He was trying to explain how Donnie Darko is "the most brilliant movie ever made". That's all fine and good - he's well entitled to his opinion. What makes the situation funny is that everyone in the aisle was looking at him like he was an idiot, and the person he was talking to was an employee who wanted nothing than to be somewhere else.

In retrospect, that's not a very good story. But I'm clicking "Submit" anyway, so you'll have to suffer.

[JCPhoenix]

Originally posted by TheDeadWalk
If we all went by that logic, then this section of the boards would go straight to shit, and then I would have to resort to firebombing countries like the Phillipines to get it out of my system.

Its either rant and rave, or sayanra President Arroyo.


yes i haev to admit these rants are quite pointless but at the same time they're extremely entertaining LMAO. keep ranting jackson13!:D

[Grim H.]

Originally posted by RogueSpear
That's why it's called "public". Everyone's allowed in.



Not true. Prisoners aren't allowed in public. :D

Seeing people like that doesn't bother me so much. In fact, I just quietly snicker as they go about their business. And when exactly did this woman call herself a "movieologist?" I mean, who the hell says that?

[jaw2929]

That's pretty fukkin hilarious... She didnt even need help pointing out her stupidity, she managed to figure it out all on her own! hah!

[outsyder]

Originally posted by jackson13
No you're not you psycho!

I just returned from my local library, where I had to endure listening to a mother/daughter combo whilst I searched for DVD's to watch. The mother was a self-proclaimed Movieologist, or so she thought. I seriously almost started laughing out loud over how dumb this woman really was when it came to movies, and how she just kept going on and on about everything like she was trying to impress people. One of the comments went like this (and yes, this is word for word):

Daughter: "Is Princess Bride any good?"
Mother: "Yeah, its a comedy, its got Steve Martin in it. Anything with Steve Martin is a comedy."
Daughter: "Mom, it doesnt say who's in it."
Mother: "Trust me, its Steve Martin. Lemme see it. *takes it from daughter* You're right, it doesnt say. Steve Martin isn't in it. Who is Cary Elwes? This isnt a comedy. It cant be."

Here's another:

Daughter: "Rudy. Oh, wait, Rudy: The Rudy Guilani Story. I thought this was that football movie."
Mother: "It is, that was that kids name."
Daughter: "Mom, it says its the story of the mayor of New York City."
Mother: "The mayor of New York City is named Rudolph. *then it hits her* Oh, Rudy is short for Rudolph. Maybe it is about him. *grabs DVD* Thats not him. Who is James Woods? This must not be about him cause he'd be in it. Do they have "Rudy"? I think its the best sports movie ever made."

By that time I had to walk away. I couldn't take her outright stupidity anymore. I had the movies I wanted and had to leave before an embolism popped in my brain from holding back laughter/frustration.

Anyways, I've had this happen before. I must have a knack for running into people who think they are geniuses when it comes to movies and then turn out to not know Jack Shit about the slightest thing. Stupid people should be prohibited from going out in public.



Funny shit, but I would have played along:


"May I recommend Kill Bill? Steve Martin is hilarious in it. Fun for all ages!"


:)

[jackson13]

Originally posted by Grim H.
And when exactly did this woman call herself a "movieologist?" I mean, who the hell says that?


She didnt. Thats a word I made up. She did however tell her daughter that she "knows movies" when her daughter asked if Mr. Mom was any good and she replied "its excellent. I know movies, its great."

Movieologist is a just a term I've used a few times when referring to so called movie "know-it-alls".



Oh, and, Im glad to see some of you think my rants are pointless. All I can say is, at least they are original and not just another thread of an already existing topic like annoying theatergoers or asshole customers.

[Tweek]

the first post got me laughing for a few minutes.
i hate people like that!

[MacReady]

Originally posted by jackson13
Oh, and, Im glad to see some of you think my rants are pointless. All I can say is, at least they are original and not just another thread of an already existing topic like annoying theatergoers or asshole customers.

Okay, everybody should calm down right about now. There's no need to undermine Jackson's pet peeves (meaning to insult his hatred or them) nor should Jackson retort by saying that other folks threads on annoying people in/at the theaters are just as unnecessary. It's the rules people.

[SkyNet]

Originally posted by jackson13
Oh, and, Im glad to see some of you think my rants are pointless. All I can say is, at least they are original and not just another thread of an already existing topic like annoying theatergoers or asshole customers.

Dude... Low blow... Low Blow Indeed!

Assholes who get to the theater at 10:29 for a 10;30 show deserve ranting on!

As for your thread here... i agree.... whenever i hear sum1 being stupid with movie knowledge.. i just politely jump in and correct them... most the time they oblige and recognize their mistake.. sometimes they fight back.. until i must put it in their face and be like "hey fucker... im right, your wrong... something you sould be used to now"!

[The Postmaster General]

One time --- this is funny -- I corrected this woman in the store who was asking about a Mario Van Peebles movie title "Mislead" -- she pronouced it "Mizzled"

I said, "Misled."

Then she was like, "Oh, well, this is the only thing I'm interested in." and proceeded to point at Mario Van Peebles.

And I was like, "Yeah Mario Van PEBBLES is pretty cool."

She was like "Mario Van PEEbles." and looked at me for a second then said, "I guess it's a good thing we ran into each other."

We both laughed, and I started thinking about how the moment could be different if I wasn't married. Then my wife started honking the car horn, and I started to sweat. The woman asked what was wrong, and I admitted that I had a moment of impure thoughts. She said that was okay, and asked where my wife was. I said in the car, and pointed. My wife saw me pointing and looked upset. The woman said that my wife was cute, and that sometimes she likes to watch Mario Van Peebles movies with married couples, because Mario Van Peebles makes her hot, and married couples make her hot. I told her that was too bad, because I was planning on watching POOTIE TANG tonight, and our couch only seats two. She said I was really missing out, and I said, "No bitch! You're missing out! Pootie Tang is da' bomb!" She just walked off.

Sorry, I started making stuff up part way through -- I realized the story wasn't that exciting.

[TheDeadWalk]

Skynet -

What Jackson meant was that people seem to be in a circular flow lately creating a lot of the same rants that have been done before.

We should be 'honorable schmoes' and report them so that the Wolfe can close it down, but we don't. That's our bad I guess, but we let it go, just like the rants that aren't movie-related.

Just take these rants with a grain of salt... either laugh at them, disagree with them, or anti-rant with them... but its somewhat irking when you make a rant like in some of mine I've been called a 'Drama Queen', and someone once did that stupid rolling eyes smiley and said (paraphrased) "Must we have a forum for every little incessant thing?"

This is one of my favorite forums, and I think it makes the board more interesting when its packed with fresh rants. But I'm sure if we give it a few more weeks we can get our fourth rant on book to film adaptations.

[MacReady]

On a lighter note,

Happy 20th birthday Jackson13!:)

[HedwigX]

Originally posted by outsyder
Funny shit, but I would have played along:


"May I recommend Kill Bill? Steve Martin is hilarious in it. Fun for all ages!"


:)

:D lmao.

She'd probably have said "Who's this Quentin Tarantino? Is he a comedy actor. This can't be a comedy..."

[jackson13]

Originally posted by MacReady
On a lighter note,

Happy 20th birthday Jackson13!:)


Thanks Mac! Been good so far, got some good presents, Cubs pulled out a win for me, been a Happy Birthday indeed.

[Cronos]

LMAO, another great rant Jackson13

ive been near people who think they know a lot about films and had to refrain from laughing when it turns out they're full of shit

[SkyNet]

the best is when the people think they know what they are talking about, and than you correct them, and they continue to say they are correct, than you just say "dude... do you know who you are talking too.. trust ME"

(thats when im with my friends.. cuz they know.. i am a MOVIEOLOGIST!!!)

[X-Nightcrawler]

Originally posted by RogueSpear
That's why it's called "public". Everyone's allowed in.

Besides, if people want to act they are all knowing when it comes to movies let them. Seriously, how could this bother you that much? Just ignore them and go on with your life. Exactly, well said.

[quoth_the_raven]

I hear people like that time from time. Generally, I wait until I'm round the corner to start laughing. I understand the need to rant about these pests, although I would not actually take the step of scalping them- they provide me with free comedy. You just don't get that often enough in life ;)