Larry The Cable Guy Politics -- Apologize? My Ass!

[Adornado]

For those who don't know, Larry The Cable Guy is a redneck comedian from The Blue Collar Comedy Tour and Git-R-Done among other things. I was browsing through his website and came across his "Commentaries" and I found this one particularly interesting.

http://www.larrythecableguy.com/commentary/2004/may/0503a.htm

What the hell is this Russia! So the Arab World wanted an apology for the torture of their prisoners! These scumbags can kiss my 30 minutes on the stair-master a day and then come home and eat Oreo cookies flabby ass! Let me ask these commie rag head carpet flying wicker basket on the head balancing scumbags something! Where's our apology for 911. Where's our apology for the 4 people that got burned and drug thru the streets of Falutia. Where's our apology for blowing up construction workers trying to rebuild your sorry ass country, where's our apology for dancing in the streets after the killing of Marines bringing food and supplies to your sorry asses! Where is it? And our scumbag news media sure as hell likes to show pictures of Iraqis naked in a pyramid but they sure as hell don't show the BS the Iraqis did when they drug dead marines and army personnel all dismembered and chard from bomb blasts. They don't want to offend the Iraqis. Our news-media is a bunch of commie scumbags. How come they don't bitch about the Arab Countries apologizing? I think those brave soldiers would much rather be in a naked pyramid then blown to smithereens. This is an outrage! When are these Arab scumbags gonna apologize for there s##t! The only thing we aughta apologize for is for not humiliating more of them back ass rag fags! Like George Bush shoulda said about apologizing,"Kiss my ass!"

Although I'm not sure I agree 100%, he does have a point. What do you think?

[James Logan]

Well, I think that the people who did 9/11, and the people who did the Fallujah killings, and the people who're beheading innocents every other day in Iraq and Saudi Arabia are scumbags. Fuckin' turtle crap. They're monsters -- they kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, and don't apologize, because they don't see why they should.

But should American leaders apologize for the torture of apparently innocent Iraqis? Yes. I think so. Why? Because America's supposed to be doing something right. It's not because Saddam or Osama aren't apologizing for their wrongs that we shouldn't. That'd make us as barbaric, cold and arrogantly disgusting as they are. It'd be like saying two wrongs make a right -- they don't apologize, we don't apologize, that's fine. That'd mean we're allowing ourselves to crawl down on the same level they're on. And I think that'd be like losing this war. And "I think those brave soldiers would much rather be in a naked pyramid then blown to smithereens." ? C'mon, man, who'd you think America is, Darth Vader? What does that mean? "We have the power to kill you all, so if we're kind enough to just strip you all and humiliate you but not kill you, you should fuckin' THANK us"? Gimme a break.

On another, slightly "side" note...let's not say "Arabs" as if everyone down there was the same. The Iraqi people haven't done anything wrong. Abdullah (random name) down there, he's got a wife and two kids like Bob would have in Virginia. He's just goin' to work -- except he can't find work, he's got one outta two chances a bomb is gonna blow off every morning and hurt him or a member of his family or someone he knows, and he pretty much knows his kids are up for a crappy life, and their kids after them too. He doesn't deserve that, he's killed no one. He's as innocent as someone walking down the street in the good ol' US of A. Don't define Osama and Saddam as Arabs. They are. But most of all, they're fuckin' nutjobs. And what they did, do, or will do does not make every single Arab in the world guilty. Because if that's what you think, then you're telling me I'm a terrorist, and my mother's a terrorist, because my mother's Arabic. Does that make sense?

And another, final, sidenote: why should the Iraqis apologize for the Marines they killed and "dismembered" during the war? The Marines came to Iraq, they got a resistance. What did they expect, flowers and ass-kissing? This is like Paul Bremer saying it's "obvious we can't stay in a country where we're clearly not welcome". Dude, you knew that in the first place -- why are you fucking here then? I'm not personally attacking you, man (Bremer, yes...you, no ;) ), but let's cut the crap about pointing the finger to the Iraqi people. As far as they're concerned, they might as well still be under Saddam's regime -- except people get killed in a more obvious, "suicide-bomb-up-your-ass" fashion these days. A foreign country sent its Army to Iraq to take out a dictator supposedly linked to a terrorist group. There was a war. People died. Now these people keep on suffering, be it from torture, poverty, suicide attacks or whatnot. And they should apologize? That doesn't make much sense to me.

Oh, and smart move calling Arabs "fags". Knowing that in their culture, if you're strict with the rules, being homosexual means you could be stoned to death, well...let's just say I hope you grasp the irony, bub.

[James Logan]

The post above is mainly directed to the ideas in the commentary Adornado quoted, by the way -- not to him personally, as I don't know to which extent he agrees with it, and, well, when I don't know, I shut up. :) I know I went on and on because not only do I think the man has NO point, but also because how he puts his supposed "point" seems dangerously narrow-minded and agressive to me.

[Adornado]

Originally posted by James Logan
The post above is mainly directed to the ideas in the commentary Adornado quoted, by the way -- not to him personally, as I don't know to which extent he agrees with it, and, well, when I don't know, I shut up. :) I know I went on and on because not only do I think the man has NO point, but also because how he puts his supposed "point" seems dangerously narrow-minded and agressive to me.

Well Logan if you thought that was bad...here's his thoughts on the Iraq Torture Photos:

What the hell is this Russia? Wow! The media and the rag heads is upset about the mistreatment of prisoners. Who gives a rat's ass! Poor lil sumbitches! That's what they get for being ungrateful scumbags. I remember seeing hostages from Japan getting smacked around with an AK-47 stuck at there heads, what the f#@$ was that a valentines gift! I personally could care less. If it was up to me I'd sit em in front of a TV and make em watch the Whoopie Goldberg show all day! Now that's cruel! Regardless of what I think it was a wrong act as far as military rules go and these folks should be punished. I know if I was getting shot at all day and caught some of them carpet flying peckerheads I'd played chopsticks on there nappy heads with a fricken hammer. But I guess we're supposed to be the nice guy. These fricken desert derelicts when the towers came down were the first ones to say "Don't blame all Muslims for the actions of a few." but when the actions of a few do something to these crybabies they lump the whole US Military into one clump! The whole Military aint responsible for this. We got guys getting shot to help them live better lives but yet they seem to forget about all that s##t! Screw em. Our news-media is more upset about a few sheep herders getting pictures taken of em with there nuts hanging down then they did when 3,000 Americans died going to work! What a bunch of commie scumbags! Like 80 percent of people I polled said after I asked them about what they thought about the Iraqi torture pictures, "Who gives a s##t!"

I can't say I agree with him here...

[chilli pepper]

no need to speak here...i'll just let some quotes do the talking for me.

These fricken desert derelicts when the towers came down were the first ones to say "Don't blame all Muslims for the actions of a few." but when the actions of a few do something to these crybabies they lump the whole US Military into one clump! The whole Military aint responsible for this. We got guys getting shot to help them live better lives but yet they seem to forget about all that s##t! Screw em.


Where's our apology for 911. Where's our apology for the 4 people that got burned and drug thru the streets of Falutia. Where's our apology for blowing up construction workers trying to rebuild your sorry ass country, where's our apology for dancing in the streets after the killing of Marines bringing food and supplies to your sorry asses! Where is it?



Exactly. Fight fire with fire. \m/.

[BubbaStrangelove]

Don't forget that part of this guy's act is to prentend he's an idiot....

He pretends to be ignorant for the sake of comedy.

[James Logan]

Originally posted by BubbaStrangelove
Don't forget that part of this guy's act is to prentend he's an idiot....

He pretends to be ignorant for the sake of comedy.

Yeah, but shouldn't he be funny, too? For the sake of comedy?

[TheDeadWalk]

Originally posted by James Logan
Yeah, but shouldn't he be funny, too? For the sake of comedy?

Props for originality. 'Rag fags' is one I'd never heard of.

Redneck humor is often funny, and to see Larry perform is hilarious because of his accent and intended stupidity. Much of the same with black humor ala Def Jam comedy. It's something to see if you haven't seen it yet.

frenchie. i keed! i keed!

[Thrizzle]

Well he has a point but its not entirely right.

The Arab world is asking for an apology from the US military. The US military tortured those prisoners. The President happens to also be the Commander-in-Chief of that military. And don't think for a second that it was just the actions of a few rogue prison guards, they were given orders. (What kind of moron documents illegal acts while giving the "thumbs up" sign)

And there is a distinction between the arab world and Al Quaeda, no one expects AQ to apologize for anything, and no one expects the arab world to apologize for AQ's acts.

[Grebdron]

Originally posted by Thrizzle
(What kind of moron documents illegal acts while giving the "thumbs up" sign)?

http://www.bushorchimp.com/images/pic21.jpg

[BubbaStrangelove]

(What kind of moron documents illegal acts while giving the "thumbs up" sign)?


http://www2.arrl.org/news/features/2002/03/15/1/Shefrin-thumbs-up.jpg



(He's downloading copyrighted music!!)

[jeo4]

Originally posted by TheDeadWalk
Props for originality. 'Rag fags' is one I'd never heard of.

Redneck humor is often funny, and to see Larry perform is hilarious because of his accent and intended stupidity. Much of the same with black humor ala Def Jam comedy. It's something to see if you haven't seen it yet.

frenchie. i keed! i keed!

I had the good fortune to meet Larry in 2001 before the attack. He was every bit as caustic then about all things political while on stage. But backstage, he was a relatively easy going guy. I look forward to his new show with Jeff Foxworthy and Bill Engvall this fall.

[Adornado]

Originally posted by jeo4
I had the good fortune to meet Larry in 2001 before the attack. He was every bit as caustic then about all things political while on stage. But backstage, he was a relatively easy going guy. I look forward to his new show with Jeff Foxworthy and Bill Engvall this fall.

Yeah, he's friggen hilarious! Have you seen The Blue Collar Comedy Tour and Git-R-Done? Two excellent examples of Larry's hilarity.