someguy
09-24-2005, 01:09 PM
This is the thread for the Canadian artists or bands that are just completely terrible and luckily stayed that way. Here they are, but be warned, I have mp3s of their music so others can share in the abuse I got.
Note: I do not know whether you Americans or Europeans or whatnot got any of this stuff too, if you did I apologize on behalf of Canada.
http://www.screensavershot.com/music/moffatts.jpg
The Moffatts
Remember the whole Hanson age? Well Canada decided to contribute by giving us The Moffatts. These are four brothers who, unlike Hanson, do not look like girls. What they do share with Hanson though is that they sing the tackiest songs and sound like shit. I guess they got popular when they sang as a part of The Bravo All Stars. The song (for charity) was called Let The Music Heal Your Soul and it was so bad that the people who got the charity money probably wouldn't accept it due to the amount of suffering people went through because of it. I downloaded their song Miss You Like Crazy and I regret that decision a lot. So share in the shitty music shall you?
The Moffatts - Miss You Like Crazy (http://www.picapic.net/media/53DHRM3)
The Moffatts ended pretty soon, I think they had a second album and then disappeared. They were recently in the news when one of the band members tried out on Canadian Idol. Luckily he didn't make it farther than the pre-elimination rounds. Time for band #2...
http://img302.imageshack.us/img302/2926/100350294yy.jpg
Serial Joe
Ah Serial Joe. Only got tons of airtime due to two songs. Skid Row and Mistake. Skid Row was terrible and so was Mistake, which sounded like a blatant rip off of Where Is My Mind at points, except their music is 'hard rock.' They even were in a Canadian movie called Out of Sync where the lead was the main character's son and the band was his friends who just HAD TO PLAY THAT CRAZY ROCK MUSIC. This band basically disappeared off the face of the earth, and I can believe this since when I looked for an mp3 I had barely any results (maybe 10). Poor Serial Joe. I did find their song Mistake which I guess made it to the US since it said US Version on one of the results.
Mistake by Serial Joe (http://www.picapic.net/media/F7G4PD4)
Next band...
http://www.xonus.com/muzeo/Aaron%20Online/prozzak-grupo.jpg
Prozzak
This is like if Gorillaz sang annoying pop songs and the vocals sounded like a mouse in puberty. They got insanely popular from their song Sucks 2 Be You, and continued to do pretty well with other songs like Strange Disease. It all began to go downhill with their single www.nevergetoveryou.com (yes that was the fucking title). Everyone kind of realized that they were shit, and the band just went away. Nobody cared or noticed. Here's an mp3 to their big single that launched them into Canadian stardom.
Sucks 2 Be You (http://www.picapic.net/media/FB5VMD5)
http://img264.imageshack.us/img264/9953/14jordybirch8jv.jpg
Jordy Birch
Canadian one hit wonder right here. His big single? Moola Moola. I'll admit it, I thought the chorus was pretty catchy. But after, oh let's say, 3 listens he gets irritating. Very fast. It's mainly because I listened to the song outside the chorus and noticed how terrible it was. Here is that single..
Moola Moola (http://www.picapic.net/media/9NZMSV5)
Jordy Birch released one album and is now gone. Completely. His website is still up, but the last news update was in somewhere like 2002.
Now for the three worst. The three absolute worst of Canadian music.
#3: http://www.kidzworld.com/img/upload/article/a512i0_tsc.jpg
SoulDecision
Jesus! In case you don't check the image source, this is from the sitw www.kidzworld.com and their big song Faded is pretty filthy for kids. The opening lines say this
When I get you all alone
I'm gonna take off all your clothes
Ain't nobody gonna interrupt my game
No no no
I remember 7 year olds dancing to this! The lyrics get even more obvious throughout, but you should listen to it yourself.
Faded (http://www.picapic.net/media/YG78V4S84Q8GV4)
That is the album version, but the radio version still had some bad stuff in it. Today, SoulDecision is trying to make a comeback. I forget their new song, but I'm not really making an effort to look for it.
#2
http://photo.sing365.com/music/picture.nsf/B4-4-photo/48256C71003578A248256B060013535C/$file/b44.jpg
B4-4
While SoulDecision were in their 20s I can understand why their content was kind of adult. This band however, they were marketed towards kids. Their first song, Get Down, was indeed about sex. A lot of people did argue against it though and said that they might not have meant that. Their next music video had the three guys chasing a 'hot' girl around who turned out to be a lesbian, they found this out when she made out with another woman. This video was pretty much the end of B4-4. You can't market lesbian motorcycle drivers to young kids. Give it 2 years. I do have their first single, Get Down. Please excuse the bad quality, this was the only one I could find.
Get Down (http://www.picapic.net/media/CGJR3NQ84Q8GV4)
and now for the #1...
http://www.jetnightclub.com/djs/images/profile/djrickyj.jpg
Ricky J
Oh Ricky J, how I hate you so. I was battling between him and B4-4 for the worst, but when I was searching on Shareaza and this result came up...
http://img349.imageshack.us/img349/5392/nomeansno4iz.jpg
I had it confirmed. He is number one. He is a one hit wonder like Jordy Birch. Unlike Moola, he has a song called No Means No. It was described as a 'fun party song' when in fact he came off as a giant fucking loser. The song (and video) is him simply going around and trying to get girls to fuck him. They say no. He became the laughing stock of Canada after this. Not so surprisingly, his career went nowhere. Now for the infamous song...
No Means No (http://www.picapic.net/media/5SPPD7P84Q8GV4)
There's plenty more I can cover. One that comes to mind if Remy Shand. But I've had all I can take today. Next time I'll have the modern atrocities, covering such terrible artists like Hedley and Alexisonfire.
Note: I do not know whether you Americans or Europeans or whatnot got any of this stuff too, if you did I apologize on behalf of Canada.
http://www.screensavershot.com/music/moffatts.jpg
The Moffatts
Remember the whole Hanson age? Well Canada decided to contribute by giving us The Moffatts. These are four brothers who, unlike Hanson, do not look like girls. What they do share with Hanson though is that they sing the tackiest songs and sound like shit. I guess they got popular when they sang as a part of The Bravo All Stars. The song (for charity) was called Let The Music Heal Your Soul and it was so bad that the people who got the charity money probably wouldn't accept it due to the amount of suffering people went through because of it. I downloaded their song Miss You Like Crazy and I regret that decision a lot. So share in the shitty music shall you?
The Moffatts - Miss You Like Crazy (http://www.picapic.net/media/53DHRM3)
The Moffatts ended pretty soon, I think they had a second album and then disappeared. They were recently in the news when one of the band members tried out on Canadian Idol. Luckily he didn't make it farther than the pre-elimination rounds. Time for band #2...
http://img302.imageshack.us/img302/2926/100350294yy.jpg
Serial Joe
Ah Serial Joe. Only got tons of airtime due to two songs. Skid Row and Mistake. Skid Row was terrible and so was Mistake, which sounded like a blatant rip off of Where Is My Mind at points, except their music is 'hard rock.' They even were in a Canadian movie called Out of Sync where the lead was the main character's son and the band was his friends who just HAD TO PLAY THAT CRAZY ROCK MUSIC. This band basically disappeared off the face of the earth, and I can believe this since when I looked for an mp3 I had barely any results (maybe 10). Poor Serial Joe. I did find their song Mistake which I guess made it to the US since it said US Version on one of the results.
Mistake by Serial Joe (http://www.picapic.net/media/F7G4PD4)
Next band...
http://www.xonus.com/muzeo/Aaron%20Online/prozzak-grupo.jpg
Prozzak
This is like if Gorillaz sang annoying pop songs and the vocals sounded like a mouse in puberty. They got insanely popular from their song Sucks 2 Be You, and continued to do pretty well with other songs like Strange Disease. It all began to go downhill with their single www.nevergetoveryou.com (yes that was the fucking title). Everyone kind of realized that they were shit, and the band just went away. Nobody cared or noticed. Here's an mp3 to their big single that launched them into Canadian stardom.
Sucks 2 Be You (http://www.picapic.net/media/FB5VMD5)
http://img264.imageshack.us/img264/9953/14jordybirch8jv.jpg
Jordy Birch
Canadian one hit wonder right here. His big single? Moola Moola. I'll admit it, I thought the chorus was pretty catchy. But after, oh let's say, 3 listens he gets irritating. Very fast. It's mainly because I listened to the song outside the chorus and noticed how terrible it was. Here is that single..
Moola Moola (http://www.picapic.net/media/9NZMSV5)
Jordy Birch released one album and is now gone. Completely. His website is still up, but the last news update was in somewhere like 2002.
Now for the three worst. The three absolute worst of Canadian music.
#3: http://www.kidzworld.com/img/upload/article/a512i0_tsc.jpg
SoulDecision
Jesus! In case you don't check the image source, this is from the sitw www.kidzworld.com and their big song Faded is pretty filthy for kids. The opening lines say this
When I get you all alone
I'm gonna take off all your clothes
Ain't nobody gonna interrupt my game
No no no
I remember 7 year olds dancing to this! The lyrics get even more obvious throughout, but you should listen to it yourself.
Faded (http://www.picapic.net/media/YG78V4S84Q8GV4)
That is the album version, but the radio version still had some bad stuff in it. Today, SoulDecision is trying to make a comeback. I forget their new song, but I'm not really making an effort to look for it.
#2
http://photo.sing365.com/music/picture.nsf/B4-4-photo/48256C71003578A248256B060013535C/$file/b44.jpg
B4-4
While SoulDecision were in their 20s I can understand why their content was kind of adult. This band however, they were marketed towards kids. Their first song, Get Down, was indeed about sex. A lot of people did argue against it though and said that they might not have meant that. Their next music video had the three guys chasing a 'hot' girl around who turned out to be a lesbian, they found this out when she made out with another woman. This video was pretty much the end of B4-4. You can't market lesbian motorcycle drivers to young kids. Give it 2 years. I do have their first single, Get Down. Please excuse the bad quality, this was the only one I could find.
Get Down (http://www.picapic.net/media/CGJR3NQ84Q8GV4)
and now for the #1...
http://www.jetnightclub.com/djs/images/profile/djrickyj.jpg
Ricky J
Oh Ricky J, how I hate you so. I was battling between him and B4-4 for the worst, but when I was searching on Shareaza and this result came up...
http://img349.imageshack.us/img349/5392/nomeansno4iz.jpg
I had it confirmed. He is number one. He is a one hit wonder like Jordy Birch. Unlike Moola, he has a song called No Means No. It was described as a 'fun party song' when in fact he came off as a giant fucking loser. The song (and video) is him simply going around and trying to get girls to fuck him. They say no. He became the laughing stock of Canada after this. Not so surprisingly, his career went nowhere. Now for the infamous song...
No Means No (http://www.picapic.net/media/5SPPD7P84Q8GV4)
There's plenty more I can cover. One that comes to mind if Remy Shand. But I've had all I can take today. Next time I'll have the modern atrocities, covering such terrible artists like Hedley and Alexisonfire.