#1  
Old 04-28-2011, 09:28 PM
Justin Lin's Fast Five

Here's the link to the published version of my review in my column at The Richmond Examiner:

http://www.examiner.com/movie-in-ric...view-fast-five



http://www.examiner.com/movie-in-ric...view-fast-five

Fast Five (2011)

Here we have the fifth (!) entry in the ďFast and the FuriousĒ franchise. Can you believe itís already been allowed to get this far? Though I suppose writing a movie about cars going fast is not particularly hard. Throw in a race, a chase, and a shoestring plot and you have yourself another one of these films. ďFast FiveĒ follows this formula to the letter, and surprisingly does thrill a little bit, although not entirely in the way they expected. However, for a film thatís this bare-boned, you know thereís going to be a few problems.

It begins with Dominic Toretto (Vin Diesel) on his way to jail, but of course his old team, including Brian OíConnor (Paul Walker) and Mia (Jordana Brewster), has other plans and busts him out. Almost immediately they get their first job in Rio, where they plan to steal some cars off of a moving train. This job results in them finding a chip that lists the financial holdings of the biggest crime boss in Rio, Reyes (Joaquim de Almeida).

In typical movie fashion, they plan ďone last jobĒ that, if successful, will mean stealing $100 million. In order to accomplish this, the team brings in several experts in various areas. However, the job becomes even more complicated after an initial hit on one of Reyesís operations causes him to move all of his money into the Rio police station where it sits inside a vault guarded by handprint recognition technology and several tons of steel. This, of course, doesnít deter them in the least as they are quite determined to move on with their lives. Meanwhile, a special officer, Hobbs (Dwayne Johnson) has been assigned to apprehend them and his determination is no less than theirs.

A film like this is going to depend majorly upon its action sequences, how frequent they are, and how well done they are. Itís highly doubtful people are going to see this because they expect a riveting story or characters that are fully-rounded. They want cars zooming by at top speeds with an explosion every now and again. Looking at the action sequences themselves, thereís one major one at the beginning and another one at the end. There are some sparse action sequences in the middle, but thereís not really enough to them to call them full-blown action scenes.

This already shows that there isnít enough action in the film, and when itís dependent on these scenes, the filmmakers are only hurting their film. The opening scenes are exciting, and in a way promise that the film will be non-stop excitement, but this simply isnít so. After the thrilling train job, which involves yanking two cars onto a tow truck from a moving train and then escaping, the film slows down in order to fill us in on the characters.

As mentioned earlier, the characters are not the kind youíre going to care about, so as to why there would be any kind of interlude to allow us to catch up with them is rather silly. They donít develop in the least, nor are the performances good enough to have us rooting for them, but seeing as how no oneís really expecting anything to the contrary, it comes as no surprise. It simply means that we have to put up with Vin Diesel, who has never been that charismatic of an actor and is somewhere on the emotive level of Steven Seagal, for longer than we should have to.

That actually brings us to another point: the film itself is far too long for the material. There is perhaps enough material here to fill a 90 minute film (perhaps even less), and yet, it runs for about two hours, throwing in several unnecessary scenes such as discovering that Mia is pregnant, a team race in stolen police cars, and scenes of a Rio police officer who has been assigned to help Hobbs, but ends up caring about Dominic instead. There was more than enough excess that could have been cut from the film in order to bring it in at a decent runtime instead of allowing it to feel so stretched out.

Then thereís the third act, which must be mentioned. I canít recall having seen such an absurd finale in a film. The amount of silliness they ask you to believe is downright laughable. Not only do you have a characterís loyalty suddenly shifting for a quick revenge spree, but you also get a chase scene that is completely impossible, turning the film into a last-minute comedy. All the action scenes up to this point had at least seemed plausible, but here, the filmmakers just decided to toss the laws of physics out the window and proceed as though it made sense.

Hopefully this is going to be the end of the line for the series. One film was enough, two was plenty, but five is just absurd. Undoubtedly, there will be several people who will flock to this film just because it has cars zooming back and forth, so at least some people will be pleased with it. But if thatís the case, then thereís not really any need to keep making more of them when there are already four others out there. This is just a really obvious cash grab to distract you from a much simpler answer: relax at home and watch the other entries. 2/4 stars.
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  #2  
Old 05-04-2011, 09:54 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hal2001 View Post
Here's the link to the published version of my review in my column at The Richmond Examiner:

Hopefully this is going to be the end of the line for the series. One film was enough, two was plenty, but five is just absurd. Undoubtedly, there will be several people who will flock to this film just because it has cars zooming back and forth, so at least some people will be pleased with it. But if thatís the case, then thereís not really any need to keep making more of them when there are already four others out there. This is just a really obvious cash grab to distract you from a much simpler answer: relax at home and watch the other entries. 2/4 stars.
This review reads like every other review you write. Based on one concept of what a movie is supposed to be. You do understand that most movies are made as entertainment, eye candy if you will. Of course the ending action scene is totally not based in reality. Who the fuck would want that? I want impossible and so do millions of other people. If they made movies only how you like them, no one would go. They would be boring as shit.

Hey, here is a bit of news for you..... comedies are often not based in reality either and you can't judge it the same was as a drama. Just get a tattoo on your forehead that reads, "I hate the movies you love."


Fast Five is an awesome movie and the best of the series. It is fun and never boring. It is a great escape for two full hours. I look forward to when they release part 6. Fast Five gives you everything you want in a PG style action film. My one issue is the big fight between Vin and The Rock. I want to see the fight and not bit and pieces of body parts. I hate this lazy "style" of shooting action scenes. Ignore the haters, because if you enjoy action, you will enjoy this film every bit as much as millions of other people.
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  #3  
Old 05-04-2011, 10:02 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Erroneous View Post
This review reads like every other review you write. Based on one concept of what a movie is supposed to be. You do understand that most movies are made as entertainment, eye candy if you will. Of course the ending action scene is totally not based in reality. Who the fuck would want that? I want impossible and so do millions of other people. If they made movies only how you like them, no one would go. They would be boring as shit.
You do know that not everyone shares your opinions? People CAN have different opinions because if everyone did think the same, that would be boring as shit.
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  #4  
Old 05-04-2011, 10:21 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ilovemovies View Post
You do know that not everyone shares your opinions? People CAN have different opinions because if everyone did think the same, that would be boring as shit.
That is just a silly comment. I am not talking about opinion. Tell me if sucked, because as far as action movies go Fast Five fails here, here and here. Don't judge Fast Five the same way you would Inception. He can hate Fast Five, but he hates it, because it does not live up to his standard of what all movies should be. Judge is as it is, eye candy. That is all I ask. I am not talking opinion. Someone as smart as you are should understand what I am saying. You may not agree, but you should understand my point of view.

I believe he also forgets that movies are made to entertain, but more importantly make money. Fast five will succeed on both points. That would be addressed in his reviews.
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  #5  
Old 05-04-2011, 03:53 PM
This movie is probably better than Gone in 60 Seconds.YAY!

I'll tell you the problem with these movies... They lack charismatic characters, they're glossy as shit, they're uncreative, they've lack quality plots and they have Paul Walker as a star of the series. The staleness really comes from the crappy characters.

They're not on par with T2, Die Hard, The Terminator, Robocop, Predator, Lethal Weapon and Bulliet. They're not really even on the same level as Speed.

This series is down there with Gone in 60 Seconds, Smokey and the Bandit sequels and Stroker Ace.

Even in something like Con Air you got Cage's performance to be amused with.

I'd call stuff like Fast and The Furious action porn. I don't know man... I just can't find the fun.

Oh, and when is Mia going to go? Sorry, she doesn't even look good. Somebody needs to tell her to eat something...

Last edited by rocknblues81; 05-04-2011 at 05:06 PM..
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  #6  
Old 05-05-2011, 03:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by rocknblues81 View Post
Oh, and when is Mia going to go? Sorry, she doesn't even look good. Somebody needs to tell her to eat something...

I was thinking that same exact thing the whole movie. She looks horrible. Her face lost 10 lbs. Like Courtney Cox sister or something. She looked way better in the first one when she had a regular gals's body not a Calvin Klein model one.
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  #7  
Old 05-05-2011, 05:41 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Erroneous View Post
I was thinking that same exact thing the whole movie. She looks horrible. Her face lost 10 lbs. Like Courtney Cox sister or something. She looked way better in the first one when she had a regular gals's body not a Calvin Klein model one.
She looked good even in 2006-2007 when she was in that terrible TCM sequel. But I saw some pics from the Fast Five movie and she looks terrible.
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  #8  
Old 09-26-2011, 12:49 PM
I was surprised with how good this movie was. It wasn't excellent but a lot better than I expected from a fifth installment of a movie series.
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