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  #1  
Old 01-22-2012, 05:16 PM
Assholes who Laugh at Innaproppiate Times

Yeah, another theater rant. I saw Shame the other day and figuring that it was an NC-17 film, I figured I'd be with a mature crowd, uhh, no. Yes audience, that is a penis, they exist. I mainly heard giggles and sighs, is this audience bi-polar or something? The main people getting me upset were a group of girls who got me mad at two points.

The first being
Spoiler:
when Fassbender is in the bar talking to the girl telling her that he wants to go down on her and taste her.

One of the girls goes "Haha, wow."

The other part that got me pretty angry was
Spoiler:
when Fassbender is in the gay club and has another guy going down on him.

The theater door opens and I hear the girl yell "Woo!", then laugh, then leave. Shut the fuck up you annoying bitch, if you can't take explicit drama seriously, go back to the AMC theater and be annoying there, I'm trying to watch a seriously compelling movie.

That is my main example but there have been other times when people laugh at the wrong moments and makes the theater a lot more awkward. The other example is when I got the brief chance to see Human Centipede 2 in theaters. I get it, that it's a fun-ish movie, but this time, the entire audience was laughing throughout. There are funny moments in the film but, it's not a fuckin' comedy.

Those are just my two prime examples but hopefully you see my point.
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  #2  
Old 01-22-2012, 08:48 PM
That agitates the ever loving fuck outta me too... When you're watching an obvious drama or horror movie with NO hints of humour in it whatsoever - and all the fuckin' cunts in the theatre are laughing as if it were a non-stop comedy. Horse-shit! What the fuck?

This is why I've gone from going to the theatre once every week, to seeing about 3-4 movies per year now. Thank fuck for DVD & Blu-Ray!
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  #3  
Old 01-22-2012, 11:33 PM
Very first shot of Kill Bill: A close up of Uma Thurman's face all beaten and fucked up.

Guy at the show: HAHAHAHAHAHA!

I don't get it.


Also, the other night this guy in front of me was laughing at the Albert Nobbs trailer, like it was the most comically absurd thing he's ever seen. WTF?
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  #4  
Old 01-23-2012, 01:00 AM
When I watched Kill Bill Vol. 1 for the first time, people were laughing during the heavy breathing at the beginning.

The second time I saw Inglourious Basterds, some douchebags were laughing during
Spoiler:
Shoshanna's death.
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  #5  
Old 01-23-2012, 01:30 PM
There were two stupid ass teens watching The girl with the dragon Tattoo in same showing as I was and they were laughing like little bitches when she was being raped. I was all about to say something when some huge ass guy about two rows behind me stood up and said "Get the fuck out now." One of the punks said no and laughed again. Then this crazy ass guy ran the 30 or so feet and yelled in the kids face "Get the fuck out NOW!" The kids ran out like little girls. The 25 or so people clapped. We enjoyed the rest of the movie.

I was shocked. I have never seen anything like that before in a theater. Turns out after the show I talked with the guy and he is a bouncer at a strip club in the city and was with one of the strippers who had been raped when she was younger. Or I assume, he just said she was a victim when she was younger. I was happy with what he did, but usually does not happen in today's world.
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  #6  
Old 01-23-2012, 01:52 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Erroneous View Post
There were two stupid ass teens watching The girl with the dragon Tattoo in same showing as I was and they were laughing like little bitches when she was being raped. I was all about to say something when some huge ass guy about two rows behind me stood up and said "Get the fuck out now." One of the punks said no and laughed again. Then this crazy ass guy ran the 30 or so feet and yelled in the kids face "Get the fuck out NOW!" The kids ran out like little girls. The 25 or so people clapped. We enjoyed the rest of the movie.

I was shocked. I have never seen anything like that before in a theater. Turns out after the show I talked with the guy and he is a bouncer at a strip club in the city and was with one of the strippers who had been raped when she was younger. Or I assume, he just said she was a victim when she was younger. I was happy with what he did, but usually does not happen in today's world.
That's an awesome story. Which also gave me the idea, they should have bouncers at theaters that could kick people out for being inappropriate pricks.
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  #7  
Old 01-23-2012, 05:39 PM
I think this is annoying during movies I love and take very seriously. I'd be annoyed if anyone laughed at an inappropriate time during, say, Titanic, or Moulin Rouge. But I can be a bit of a hypocrite if I don't personally love the film myself I was giggling a lot in some of the emotional parts of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 (the return to the Gryffindor common room! Neville's fucking horrible speech). Now that may have pissed a lot of the die-hard fans off, but it was under-my-breath laughing, not LMFAOing in the middle of a packed theatre.

People were pissing themselves in my sitting of Paranormal Activity 3. It damn near killed the movie too. That's probably the worst movie audience I've ever witnessed.
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  #8  
Old 01-23-2012, 06:44 PM
Well l dont like it when you have a interest in a movie and a group og people are making stupid noises

But another thing l hate is when you are relaxing in your chair and sudderly someone kicks your chair not once but continuelly

Also l hate it when people in the theatre start throwing things at all the other patrons

Geez the bloody jaffa ball lollie can really hurt if there is alot thrown at you
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  #9  
Old 01-23-2012, 06:55 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Erroneous View Post
There were two stupid ass teens watching The girl with the dragon Tattoo in same showing as I was and they were laughing like little bitches when she was being raped. I was all about to say something when some huge ass guy about two rows behind me stood up and said "Get the fuck out now." One of the punks said no and laughed again. Then this crazy ass guy ran the 30 or so feet and yelled in the kids face "Get the fuck out NOW!" The kids ran out like little girls. The 25 or so people clapped. We enjoyed the rest of the movie.

I was shocked. I have never seen anything like that before in a theater. Turns out after the show I talked with the guy and he is a bouncer at a strip club in the city and was with one of the strippers who had been raped when she was younger. Or I assume, he just said she was a victim when she was younger. I was happy with what he did, but usually does not happen in today's world.
I hope you shook the man's hand for obvious reasons AND that thing he did. I wish more people were this ballsy when little kids ruin movie showings like that.
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  #10  
Old 01-23-2012, 06:56 PM
People who do the chair-kicking thing are so annoying.

But I also hate cinema patrons who tell you to take your feet off the seat in front of you. I'm complex
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  #11  
Old 01-23-2012, 06:57 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bondgirl View Post

But another thing l hate is when you are relaxing in your chair and sudderly someone kicks your chair not once but continuelly
Best advice and fix for that is to come early and sit all the way in the back. Great view and nobody's kicking your chair
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  #12  
Old 01-23-2012, 06:59 PM
Well one thing that is annoying is when one has a coughing fit at the cinema

The looks that are given is not nice
.
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  #13  
Old 01-23-2012, 07:19 PM
When I saw "Schindler's List" in the theaters, during the scenes when the Jews were being stripped and led the chambers, there was nervous laughter. Not a lot and it wasn't as if people were laughing out of frivolity, but I still remember trying to watch the movie and thinking "WTF? Are people THAT hung up on nudity?"
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  #14  
Old 01-23-2012, 07:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bondgirl View Post
Well one thing that is annoying is when one has a coughing fit at the cinema

The looks that are given is not nice
.
You think coughing is bad? Years ago, I forget what movie my friends and I were seeing, there was a family - mother, father and young daughter - seated directly behind us and for a good part of the movie, the daughter kept complaining she wasn't feeling well. My friends and I turned around a couple of times and even suggested that if the child was sick, she shouldn't be in the theater. At one point, the mother told her "shh, the movie's almost over" while the father kept saying "maybe we should take her to the lobby". Right then... BLEEEECH! It was like Linda Blair in "The Exorcist" only it was a river of vomit under our seats. Almost everyone in our aisle and a few of the rows ahead of us all stood up and got out of the way.
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  #15  
Old 01-23-2012, 07:31 PM
Gross.

My friend was really ill when I took her to watch We Bought a Zoo. She had just recently been in hospital but insisted she was fine. I kept saying "are you sure you want to see the movie tonight, we could go another time..." but she was adamant she was okay. But sure enough, after downing half a bucket of popcorn and a large fizzy, she started feeling really sick and kept moaning about it to me and our other friend. I was like..."here's the keys, go wait in the car" Even though that movie sucked balls (and was so sickeningly over-the-top and sentimental it probably onsetted her nausea) I still wanted to see what happened at the end.

In conclusion, if you're sick - stay home! Don't expect other cinema-goers to suffer for yor foolishness.
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  #16  
Old 01-23-2012, 09:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by edonline View Post
You think coughing is bad? Years ago, I forget what movie my friends and I were seeing, there was a family - mother, father and young daughter - seated directly behind us and for a good part of the movie, the daughter kept complaining she wasn't feeling well. My friends and I turned around a couple of times and even suggested that if the child was sick, she shouldn't be in the theater. At one point, the mother told her "shh, the movie's almost over" while the father kept saying "maybe we should take her to the lobby". Right then... BLEEEECH! It was like Linda Blair in "The Exorcist" only it was a river of vomit under our seats. Almost everyone in our aisle and a few of the rows ahead of us all stood up and got out of the way.
Well l knew how that little girl felt as l had a terrible flu at the time
It was me coughing out lloud for everyone to hear

My daughter was so looking forward to see a Winnie The Pooh movie starring Piglet as the star of the show grins

I had to go so my daughter could see this movie but l thought that drinking alot of coke would help seeing it was a large cup

It didt work did it l was getting very nasty looks but my daughter was happy seeing her favourite characters

I was reading the paper a couple of days later and there is a thumbs up and thumbs down section

Guess who was mentioned

It complained that there was this mum who coughed right through the show and the lady said she coulddt hear a thing because l me

Oh dear she said that l should have gone home and l should not have taken my daughter there

So yes l know l was wrong being in the theatre so l have to say l am one of the pain in the arses who had to wreck it for others
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  #17  
Old 01-24-2012, 01:51 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by edonline View Post
When I saw "Schindler's List" in the theaters, during the scenes when the Jews were being stripped and led the chambers, there was nervous laughter. Not a lot and it wasn't as if people were laughing out of frivolity, but I still remember trying to watch the movie and thinking "WTF? Are people THAT hung up on nudity?"
Reminds me of a story... back in grade school, our teachers took me and a group of friends to see Schindler's List in theaters. I'm guessing they wanted to give us a history lesson, but would you make a group of rowdy 11 year-olds watch a Holocaust film and not expect them to get restless?

There we were, basically keeping our mouths shut and trying to follow a three-hour black and white film, and then came the scene where the family is hiding out from a Nazi patrol inside a house. I remember there was a guy inside the piano who came out thinking the coast was clear, and he stepped on a key and the soldiers shot up the place (I think that's what happened, my memory's vague). One of my friends blurted out, "What a fucking moron!" or something to that effect, and we couldn't help but burst out laughing. We got evil looks from every other patron and detention for a week to boot.
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  #18  
Old 01-24-2012, 11:49 AM
I made it to the midnight premiere of LOTR: ROTK and a couple brought a 3 month old baby. I was shocked. I did not complain though because the baby was quiet until the witch king shows up on the fell beast. The loud screeching sound it made must have either scared the baby or hurt his ears because he cried for the next 5 mins until the father made the mother take the baby to the lobby. I felt bad for her because you must really want to see the movie to bring a baby to it but I was still happy the baby was gone.

The only time I inappropriately laughed (maybe) was when I was 15-16. My older brother took me to see The Craft. I laughed when Christine Taylor's character, the blond bitch, says the line "Oh God look, there is a pubic hair in my brush. Oh no wait, wait. That's just one of Rochelle's little nappy hairs."

My brother punched me in the arm and whispered for me to not laugh because it was racist.
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  #19  
Old 01-24-2012, 02:06 PM
Rob Zombie's Halloween (deserved to be laughed at, so I can't complain) and Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix were both plagued by this very kind of audience. There are some films which it is appropriate to laugh at/applaud, and others which are more serious. I don't have a problem with audience participation in a film so long as it is respectable to the rest of the audience, but there have been other instances, such as The Hills Have Eyes 2, which were utterly intolerable. The teenage brats sitting in front of us were making obnoxious jokes and repeating themselves to make sure everybody in the whole fucking cineplex heard. That's the kind of moviegoer I can't stand..
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  #20  
Old 01-24-2012, 07:28 PM
I too was watching GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO and when she dropped trou in the cabin after sewing him up, I heard this one guy go "Hellooooooooo!"

I wanted to throw my drink in his face.
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  #21  
Old 01-24-2012, 07:37 PM
Well when you say about children and babies in theatres

I have a had quite a few experieces where chiildren get bored so they start yelling telling there parents they are bored

Some parents take there children to mature age movies which in other words they shouldnt be there

I would never take a baby iwhile l went to see a movie becuse they do make alot of noise l used to get my parents or my brothers to look afrer my daughter if l wanted to see something at the theatre
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  #22  
Old 01-24-2012, 08:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MovieMaster View Post
until the witch king shows up on the fell beast. The loud screeching sound it made must have either scared the baby or hurt his ears
That part even hurt my ears. That screeching noise was...awful (in a good way). I'm not surprised the baby burst into tears.
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  #23  
Old 01-27-2012, 12:21 PM
I got a lot of that during the Assault on Precinct 13 remake.

Spoiler:
That one scene where Maria Bello and that other gal take off in the SUV and when one of the corrupt cops shoots the driver. One of the audiene members shouts " Grand Theft Auto baby" out load.
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  #24  
Old 03-07-2012, 11:10 PM

Assholes who laugh at inappropriate times would cop this from me if I was in a bad mood...


Last edited by God of War; 03-07-2012 at 11:17 PM..
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  #25  
Old 03-08-2012, 05:14 PM
I laughed at
Spoiler:
Bryan Cranston's death in Drive
. Sue me.
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  #26  
Old 03-14-2012, 06:22 AM
I went to the movies to see the film BATTLE: LOS ANGELES with my friends. I didn't enjoy it much with the exception of Aaron Eckhart because he is fantastic. But here's what happened, whenever ANYTHING blew up these ass-hole high schoolers would laugh and scream. Eventually I said shut up that was the freakin' good-guys who just got blownup you idiots.
Then I got much less tolerant.


Also when I saw True Grit some one's phone kept ringing and this old lady stood up on her chair and cussed her out... pretty funny.
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  #27  
Old 03-14-2012, 05:10 PM
Oh man I totally forgot about the guy in Chronicle!


There was dude sitting RIGHT behind my girlfriend and I during Chronicle that would ridiculously overreact to the slightest bit of drama or comedy in the movie.

I mean, the dude would go on and on and on:

*Joke happens*

Guy: AHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA! OH MAN!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! *REPEATS JOKE FOR EMPHASIS!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

*Something dramatic happens with main character"

Guy: "OMG! OMG DUDE!!!!! HOLY SH!T!!! OH MAN! OH MAN! GOD!"


He sounded like he had never seen a movie before EVER. He chilled out about 30 minutes into the movie though. As obnoxious as it was it was kinda funny so I really wasn't too pissed off. Me and my girl were just looking at each other like "What the fuck is wrong with this guy?" He could have been doing it to be an asshole, but he sounded legit to me. Dude was just into the movie.
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  #28  
Old 03-15-2012, 08:34 AM
I've certainly had those people in a theater with me, Poop. I have to admit, though, Chronicle was definitely a powerful movie and I nearly had the same reaction as that guy seems to have had in one particular scene of the film, if it's what I think you're referring to. I was not expecting a lot of things in that film to go down the way they did! I also read his reaction as something like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y9KyBdPeKHg
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  #29  
Old 05-01-2012, 08:44 PM
Yeah, had this when I watched "There Will Be Blood", some douchebag businessmen types would crack up during most of the films more intense scenes, now understandably Day Lewis' performance at times has an air of dark comedy to it but these dudes just seemed to be laughing cause the film made them uncomfortable and didn't seem they wanted to admit, or they just missed the point entirely. It didn't ruin the film for me though, I just thought it was lame and kind've perplexing.
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  #30  
Old 05-01-2012, 10:41 PM
I didn't laugh, but I wouldn't blame anyone for laughing at the end of There Will Be Blood. It was such a cartoonishly over the top moment. Especially the popular milkshake line. I know people love that scene, but I stand by that that scene felt like it belonged in an entirely different movie. Like I said, it was so over the top that I would laughed myself if I weren't so perplexed by it.

I still love the movie though. It's just that last scene that didn't work for me.
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  #31  
Old 05-02-2012, 07:27 PM
This certainly rustles my jimmies. Especially in a horror movie, however cheesy it may be, when that ONE FUCKING GUY decides he'll display his bravado and laugh at every kill, scare, jump whatever.
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  #32  
Old 05-08-2012, 01:39 AM
Not sure about laughing, but sometimes my asshole farts at inappropriate times.
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  #33  
Old 05-08-2012, 03:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Postmaster General View Post
Not sure about laughing, but sometimes my asshole farts at inappropriate times.
Glad to know it's not just me.
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  #34  
Old 05-08-2012, 08:08 PM
One thing l have to say is that l have never heard or smelt a fart at the local cinema
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  #35  
Old 05-08-2012, 08:28 PM
Try opening a beer can in a theater .... people will smell it 4 rows behind you and someone will complain about it and try to get you kicked out.
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  #36  
Old 05-08-2012, 08:33 PM
Well try coughing right through a movie

I can tell you the crowd were not amused with me at this time
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  #37  
Old 05-09-2012, 01:20 AM
I thought you were about the suggest coughing as you open the beer. You can also wait until there is a loud explosion, like I do with the fart thing.
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  #38  
Old 05-09-2012, 02:22 AM
OMG this thread is funny right now. Lol Postmaster
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  #39  
Old 05-09-2012, 07:45 PM
Well since the sound is quite loud in the cinema you could let out a nice loud fart
it is the same if you are at a nightclub and standing there talking to a nice looking man and you can let one out and they wouldnt have a clue

Ah if l had gold class ticket l could have had that beer and like you sugested l could have splurted it everywhere
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  #40  
Old 05-09-2012, 08:25 PM
That's fucking gross. I bet you fart into people's drinks when they aren't looking. You carry a wisp around and use it to filter you farts into their drinks. You call it a-LetterRipNol and you and your friends just laugh.
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