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Old 09-24-2010, 03:27 AM
Huck Botko's and Andrew Gurland's The Virginity Hit

Here's the link to the published version of my review in my column at The Richmond Examiner:



The Virginity Hit (2010)

"The Virginity Hit" is a completely unfunny, mind-numbingly dull experience that focuses on one uninteresting thing and one only: the attempt by some friends to get another friend to lose his virginity. From that brief synopsis, you can probably tell what kind of movie this is going to be and whether or not it is going to be a movie for you. It sounds like it could be an interesting idea, but that all depends on how the filmmakers treat the material. Sadly, after the first few minutes, you realize very early on that they are going to take the lowest road possible.

It begins as one of the four friends announces that he has recently lost his virginity, and to celebrate, he has purchased a bong which they agree only to use as each of them loses their virginity. Two more of the friends accomplish this within a few months leaving Matt (Matt Bennett) the only virgin of the group. He currently has a girlfriend, Nicole (Nicole Weaver), who everyone assumes he is going to lose his virginity to very soon, but it is soon revealed that she cheated on him, so now Matt decides to look elsewhere in order to complete his goal.

The whole film is played out in a pseudo-documentary style to make it seem like this is all really happening. This is what ends up causing it to feel like a never-ending series of bad home videos or overly-long videos on YouTube (which the friends utilize quite a bit throughout). Think of watching the dullest home videos you can imagine about the least interesting people you know. That will give you an idea of what "The Virginity Hit" is like.

If the filmmakers were going to bother making this in the documentary style, why not make it about something more interesting than following these bozos around as they try to get their friend laid? Even pseudo-documentaries should have to follow the basic rules of real documentaries in that they should be about an interesting subject and that they should have something to say about that subject, but both of these are ignored in exchange for just heaving a camera around as all of these guys make fools of themselves.

Turning to the "humor," it's pretty much what you can expect from a movie that is simply about trying to have sex. It has plenty of bad sexual jokes, all of which fall flat, and gets even more juvenile with a scene in which Matt gets diarrhea while trying to make out with his girlfriend. Then, when you think it can't get any lower, they throw in a scene of one of the friends shaving Matt's pubic hair.

Raunchy humor can sometimes be good, but "The Virginity Hit" goes straight for it every time and, as I mentioned before, takes the low road every time, going for the cheapest laughs possible. Maybe they thought they were being funny or charming, but you could literally hear a pin drop during this screening. I even saw something that I've never noticed before at a screening: several people getting up, walking out, and not coming back. By the end of the film, two or three rows that had had a fair amount of people in them were completely empty, and that's just from what I noticed.

Glancing at Huck Botko's and Andrew Gurland's, the writers/directors, small filmographies, the only other thing they’ve written that I’ve seen was the recent "The Last Exorcism," another film done in a documentary style. That was another film that didn't quite work, but it had at least been slightly interesting up to a point before spiraling out of control with a really silly third act. "The Virginity Hit" never ends up being interesting and does nothing but spiral out of control from the very start. Perhaps someone should make a documentary about these guys and how they were able to get these screenwriting gigs....or maybe not. It would probably be just as boring to watch them as it is to watch this film. 1.5/4 stars.
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