The muscle-bound douches with 80s hair were swarming to Scarlett Johansson's yacht this weekend, ogling her perfect ass in the warm Italian sunlight. You can see she was desperately trying to ignore his bulging advances with some iPhone distractions, but the missing link was persistent. Eventually she had to bring in a friend to run interference while she attempted to escape, but the stench of Old Spice and butt sweat overwhelmed her. Shame she couldn't have taken a cue from her Black Widow alter ego and belted him one in his goofy, mirrored sunglasses for his presumptuousness. The really sad part is that the two of them were spotted leaving together later. Let's just hope she's just having herself a fling with underwear catalogue boy and not a full-fledged relationship, because having this hairless ape tagging along in every candid photo is really going to suck.
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