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Battle of the Babes #157: Hot Pirate Wenches

May. 19, 2011by: Cherry Liquor

I wish I could say that I was excited about PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: ON STRANGER TIDES being the only huge release this weekend. Hell, I wish I could say I was excited in the slightest about the fourth installment of a movie franchise that I only liked the first time around but was foolish enough (along with the other people who funneled over $2.6 billion into the three films) to get sucked into twice more, but much like I can never deny a Double-Stuff Oreo, I can't help but shine my cynical light on this subject. The films have had a stunning trio of women in them over the years, however. Why don't be focus on that?

Keira Knightley

Keira might be able to attribute her first big cinematic break to BEND IT LIKE BECKHAM, but it was the PIRATES movies that made her the mainstream success that she is today. Such a cute girl who could fight with the best of them, Knightley's charm carried what could have been a monotone character into the wonderful Swann that she developed into.

Penelope Cruz

I can't speak for how Penelope is going to fare in ON STRANGER TIDES, since I'm writing this before I've seen the movie. (And - BIG sigh - I will end up seeing this movie.) And since she was knocked up with her Bardem baby during filming, leaving the action shots to sister Monica, I can only go on the charm that this Spanish beauty exudes on a regular film basis. I'm certain she'll be a great foil for Depp, although.

Zoe Saldana

Most people wax over that Zoe was Anamaria in THE CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL but back before she became the overexposed fanboy favorite that she is today, Saldana was the new face that sparked my interest in 2003. Too bad they didn't figure out how to work her into the more current installment.

Which PIRATES wench would you most like to blow you down?

Source: IMDB

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-1
11:23AM on 05/20/2011

Penelope Cruz

No contest!
No contest!
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+0
9:00AM on 05/20/2011
Keira Knightley for my '' PIRATE'S WENCH '' !!!
Keira Knightley for my '' PIRATE'S WENCH '' !!!
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+0
2:13AM on 05/20/2011
Keira.
Keira.
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1:58AM on 05/20/2011
Keira Knightley!
Keira Knightley!
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12:57AM on 05/20/2011

Penelope

Penelope Cruz easily. Zoe Saldana is a twig, and Kiera Knightly used to be hot, but looks like a teenage boy now. Penelope is very sexy.
Penelope Cruz easily. Zoe Saldana is a twig, and Kiera Knightly used to be hot, but looks like a teenage boy now. Penelope is very sexy.
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11:16PM on 05/19/2011

3-Way Tie

I honestly can't decide. I mean, seriously? They're all unbelievably hot and for different reasons. For one thing, they each represent the physical pinnacle of 3 separate ethnicities, so right there, each has something uniquely hot to offer.
I honestly can't decide. I mean, seriously? They're all unbelievably hot and for different reasons. For one thing, they each represent the physical pinnacle of 3 separate ethnicities, so right there, each has something uniquely hot to offer.
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-2
10:55PM on 05/19/2011
Zoe is a sexy thing. Keira nope. Penelope yeah she's a pass.
Zoe is a sexy thing. Keira nope. Penelope yeah she's a pass.
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+1
7:43PM on 05/19/2011

Penelope Cruz

Penepole by far has the best curves
Penepole by far has the best curves
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+1
6:24PM on 05/19/2011
Penelope Cruz by a mile here. Keira and Zoe are waaaaaay too skinny for me.
Penelope Cruz by a mile here. Keira and Zoe are waaaaaay too skinny for me.
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6:08PM on 05/19/2011
Keira!
Keira!
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+3
3:04PM on 05/19/2011

Keira Knightley

Of course.
Of course.
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+0
2:44PM on 05/19/2011
Zoe Saldana wins out, but Keira Knightley is not far behind
Zoe Saldana wins out, but Keira Knightley is not far behind
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2:05PM on 05/19/2011

FTW

Zoe Saldana, so beautiful and so talented. she's getting more and more roles but still under-rated.
Zoe Saldana, so beautiful and so talented. she's getting more and more roles but still under-rated.
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2:00PM on 05/19/2011
Keira Knightley!
Keira Knightley!
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2:00PM on 05/19/2011
Zoe!
Zoe!
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1:46PM on 05/19/2011
Penelope.
Penelope.
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+1
1:35PM on 05/19/2011
Kiera!
Kiera!
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1:30PM on 05/19/2011

All three!!

But Zoe edges them out just slightly.
But Zoe edges them out just slightly.
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1:28PM on 05/19/2011
Kiera
Kiera
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1:22PM on 05/19/2011
Kiera. Especially in that hat!
Kiera. Especially in that hat!
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12:56PM on 05/19/2011
Kiera!
Kiera!
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12:49PM on 05/19/2011
Can I choose All of the Above this time?
Can I choose All of the Above this time?
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11:47AM on 05/19/2011

Kiera Knightly

.. so HOT in the POTC movies.... but no wrong choice here.
.. so HOT in the POTC movies.... but no wrong choice here.
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11:19AM on 05/19/2011

Zoe

This may be the hardest one yet.
This may be the hardest one yet.
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11:35AM on 05/19/2011
That's what she said. Thanks! I'll be here all week!
That's what she said. Thanks! I'll be here all week!
+0
10:38AM on 05/19/2011

Tough Selection...

But I'm gonna go with Knightley.
But I'm gonna go with Knightley.
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10:30AM on 05/19/2011

Knightley

Keira Knightley for the win! Show me a girl in a cowgirl hat, and I'm sold. But she was also ridiculously gorgeous in Pirates 1 (in particular)
Keira Knightley for the win! Show me a girl in a cowgirl hat, and I'm sold. But she was also ridiculously gorgeous in Pirates 1 (in particular)
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10:24AM on 05/19/2011
Not a fan of Penelope Cruz but it is a close call between Keira and Zoe. Probably go with Keira though.
Not a fan of Penelope Cruz but it is a close call between Keira and Zoe. Probably go with Keira though.
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10:21AM on 05/19/2011
Keira Knightley. I didn't even read the headline title and just scrolled down and once I saw Keira, I already knew my answer.
Keira Knightley. I didn't even read the headline title and just scrolled down and once I saw Keira, I already knew my answer.
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10:12AM on 05/19/2011

keira

I'll take Knightley. She is my current number one hottie.
I'll take Knightley. She is my current number one hottie.
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-1
10:11AM on 05/19/2011
Knightley.. But Saldana is close
Knightley.. But Saldana is close
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10:09AM on 05/19/2011
Saldana.

I'm told by reliable sources that the other two are also hot, but I don't see it.
Saldana.

I'm told by reliable sources that the other two are also hot, but I don't see it.
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10:07AM on 05/19/2011
Zoe
Zoe
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+0
10:03AM on 05/19/2011

keira.

pirates 5: elizabeth & anamaria vs capt jack vs barbossa.
pirates 5: elizabeth & anamaria vs capt jack vs barbossa.
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+3
9:54AM on 05/19/2011

Zoe

But they are all hot.
But they are all hot.
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9:40AM on 05/19/2011
Keira Knightley hands down. Penelope and Zoe hot, Keira is SMOKIN!!!!!!!
Keira Knightley hands down. Penelope and Zoe hot, Keira is SMOKIN!!!!!!!
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+0
9:17AM on 05/19/2011

Keira Knightley

Close match between Keira & Zoe. Cruz lagging far behind.
Close match between Keira & Zoe. Cruz lagging far behind.
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9:08AM on 05/19/2011

Keira

This was a good one. Very hard to pick just one, they're all hot.
This was a good one. Very hard to pick just one, they're all hot.
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8:33AM on 05/19/2011

Now THIS is my kind of contest! ;)

Cruz
Cruz
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7:48AM on 05/19/2011

Kiera

though a kiera/zoe sandwich would be ideal. penelope can videotape it.
though a kiera/zoe sandwich would be ideal. penelope can videotape it.
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7:43AM on 05/19/2011

Keira

I'll take Keira over any other female on the planet. Perfection.
I'll take Keira over any other female on the planet. Perfection.
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+5
5:00AM on 05/19/2011
Three amazing ladies, but Keira is on a whole other level of stunning beauty compared to nearly any other actress.
Three amazing ladies, but Keira is on a whole other level of stunning beauty compared to nearly any other actress.
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+5
4:52AM on 05/19/2011

Keira

They are all so gorgeous that closing your eyes and picking up at random makes no difference, but Keira is my love for past 10 years.
They are all so gorgeous that closing your eyes and picking up at random makes no difference, but Keira is my love for past 10 years.
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+3
4:50AM on 05/19/2011
Keira for a lightyear
Keira for a lightyear
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4:41AM on 05/19/2011

Saldana

no question
no question
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3:26AM on 05/19/2011

Keira

Worth having to have your heart cut out just to see her once every ten years.
Worth having to have your heart cut out just to see her once every ten years.
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+1
3:21AM on 05/19/2011

Zoe Saldana

By a mile. But I would've voted for Naomie Harris if she had been included in this battle.
By a mile. But I would've voted for Naomie Harris if she had been included in this battle.
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2:35AM on 05/19/2011

Penelope

No question about this one. The other two don't do anything for me but Cruz is a Spanish goddess.
No question about this one. The other two don't do anything for me but Cruz is a Spanish goddess.
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2:16AM on 05/19/2011

Keira

The original.
The original.
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