The count for last week's Battle
is as stands: Megan Fox had 6 votes, Charlize had 5 and Salma cleaned up with 13. So much for the argument that when you get older, age ruins you. This week, let's take a look at some of the less obvious Kevin Smith chicks, because when you filter out the bromance laced through his storylines, you'll find that a lot of the movie relies on hot (and often times smart
Claire Forlani normally wouldn't have been my first choice from MALLRATS, as her character of Brandi, the whining girlfriend to the good-intentioned T.S., was just annoying as f*ck. But even when I pit her against her co-star (and my favorite bad girl) Shannen Doherty, I'd be pretty stupid to not notice how damn hot Forlani is. Based on characters, Rene will remain my love from the sophomoric effort by Smith (and despite popular opinion that this movie sucked, it's actually my second favorite of his under CLERKS) if for the Mighty Mouse speech alone. But Forlani's eyes have you at "Hellllloooo Nurse!"
Flying past CHASING AMY, let's go the opposite direction of Joey Lauren Adams' high-pitched tone and straight into the sultry hotness that always has been Linda Fiorentino's vocal chords. As the beleaguered Bethany, saddled with infertility, being the last hope for civilization and having to fend off sexual advances from Jay, Fiorentino rocked. Most will simply point out the strip club scene in DOGMA featuring Salma Hayek. I love the woman, but it was more satisfying to watch her in FRIDA where she actually bares her frijoles. DOGMA might have been flawed, but with T.S. type intentions.
Oh, how I clearly recall the moment when my respect for Smith began to spiral out of control. First he gives me a bunch of hotties, including Shannon Elizabeth, as leather-clad robbers, then he's throwing in an orangutan and shoving Dawson's huge noggin in my face. JAY AND SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK was a messy disaster, even with the appearance of Morris Day. Fart jokes and including the Playboy playmate who married you for "love"? Yeah, suddenly that guy who made being a fanboy/girl socially acceptable (if not outright coveted) turned around and pissed all over us for our troubles.
I have my fingers crossed for ZACK & MIRI, but I've also got whopping doubts. However, this is about hotties, so come at me with your fave.