Forget about the women who gave the best performances over the course of 2008 (although I have my favorites). Let's talk about what if there were an Academy Award for the Best Bitch. Angelina automatically gets cut from the list because even though I am a fan of Bekmambetov, I actually hated WANTED. (Of course, that might have had something to do with the fact that I actually read
the source material and didn't find Angie to be as big of a bitch as she needed to be. So here were three of my favorite bitches of 2008. Some obvious, some not quite so.
The slutty bitch who thinks she's all smart and therefore empowered enough in her femininity and sexual needs that even though she despises Tony Stark in IRON MAN, she still ends up horizontally mamboing with him. (Love the Pepper Potts line about taking out the trash.) Bibb got the short straw in the casting here, as she can and has been great in roles in the past and instead is playing the token thorn in the side of the hero. But a cute little blonde bitch that takes you by surprise, nonetheless.
I think I might be the only person dorky enough to start singing "Cold Hearted Snake" (yes, that's by Paula from "American Idol," children) when I think of Allen as the prison warden in DEATH RACE in which she has her inmates race to their deaths for reality pay-per-view profit. I won't lie... Jason Statham will get my ass in a seat with whatever high voltage crap he puts out because YES, he really is that charismatic. However, Allen put the ice on this light weight fluff piece of entertainment and you gotta love the bitch in her for doing so.
For the very few of you who watched the inspired YOUNG PEOPLE FUCKING, first... fist-bump because you're awesome. For those who haven't seen the movie, make it a priority to put into your NetFlix queue or yell at your video store clerk. Diora Baird, that chick known for a whole lot of minimal roles in fairly big movies, manages to pull off the bitch that you never want to meet, especially in bed. That bitch who acts coy, makes you beg, makes you think you have to put on a show but really just wanted to get laid and belittles you for not coming through. This is the bitch who doesn't realize just how poorly executed her bitchiness is, unless she's shooting for the 3-pointer at the buzzer. But in all fairness, she's so good in the movie that it's important to note that she helps to make it that much more watchable.
Which is your favorite Best Bitch of 2008?