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Body Shop: Julianne Moore

Nov. 30, 2009by: Mr. Pink

All the recent media coverage of kids getting beat up by too literal idiots on Kick A Ginger Day got me thinking about some of the hot redheads in the Hollywood pool. 'Cause let me tell you, if you kick a ginger then karma will make sure you never get to f*ck a ginger. And that means you'd never get a chance at hot soulless lovin' with: JULIANNE MOORE!

Check her out in - A Single Man

ASS (4/10):

Yikes! Moore is eminently bangable, but wow the backside is grim. As you can see here (NSFW) she doesn't even look like she's got a full sized booty. It's some sort of weird half-butt. And what is there is flat and kinda droopy. Just not good news by any measure.

BOOBIES (7/10):

I'll be honest, Moore's boobs confuse me. From some angles they look kinda average, yet at other times they look pretty damn amazing (NSFW). So which is indicative of reality? I'm not sure. So we'll split the difference until I get a chance to do some field research.

FACE (8/10):

I don't think Julianne gets a lot of credit for being as gorgeous as she is. Not entirely sure why since she is a definite case of damn yummy. Whatever the reason, when you get down to it this is certainly a ginger you would NOT kick out of bed.

PERSONALITY (7/10):

She's a nice enough gal, but most of what makes her interesting seems to be what she can do with a role. As with many great actresses, having a non-distracting personality is a bonus because it keeps things uncluttered for the characters she plays.

CAREER (9/10):

Mulltiple Oscar nominations are plenty reason to get excited over JM's career. However the better reason is that she's an actress who not only consistently finds interesting projects, but also turns in outstanding and unique performances pretty much every single time. Hard to do much better than this talented lass.

High points: THE MYTH OF FINGERPRINTS, BOOGIE NIGHTS, CHILDREN OF MEN
Low points: PSYCHO, HANNIBAL

OVERALL (7/10):

Julianne Moore is a tough cookie to BS because the strength of her various attributes is all over the map. That said she is one sexy package when you take it all together. She doesn't have the typical look of your men's mag babes, but when push comes to shove most of you would probably prefer to get down with this unexpected lady than some tarty flavor of the week anyway.

Source: MovieHotties

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+1
3:33PM on 12/03/2009
49 and still sackable - gotta love this broad!
49 and still sackable - gotta love this broad!
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2:39AM on 12/02/2009
i'm a sucker for a redhead & she is gorgeous, not afraid to show the goods either & she is a great actress, Boogie Nights is one of my favorite movies, so ya a bit harsh on the ratings this time
i'm a sucker for a redhead & she is gorgeous, not afraid to show the goods either & she is a great actress, Boogie Nights is one of my favorite movies, so ya a bit harsh on the ratings this time
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+3
9:28AM on 12/01/2009
Extremely hot. 10/10
Extremely hot. 10/10
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4:59AM on 12/01/2009

Are you kidding?

A 7?
Who writes this column. Any actress who can star in Stallone movie ( Asassins ) and still have a high profile career deserves more respect. She would have to be one of the greats of her generation!
A 7?
Who writes this column. Any actress who can star in Stallone movie ( Asassins ) and still have a high profile career deserves more respect. She would have to be one of the greats of her generation!
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1:13PM on 12/01/2009
Hmm, what to reply to? Let me just say that she's a great actress and got her due for that in the column. Beyond that, well, this is The Body Shop, not The Great Career Shop.
Hmm, what to reply to? Let me just say that she's a great actress and got her due for that in the column. Beyond that, well, this is The Body Shop, not The Great Career Shop.
4:57AM on 12/01/2009

Are you kidding?

A 7?
Who writes this column. Any actress who can star in Stallone movie ( Asassins ) and still have a high profile career deserves more respect. She would have to be one of the greats of her generation!
A 7?
Who writes this column. Any actress who can star in Stallone movie ( Asassins ) and still have a high profile career deserves more respect. She would have to be one of the greats of her generation!
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3:17AM on 12/01/2009
She's hot. My penis told me so.
She's hot. My penis told me so.
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4:59AM on 12/01/2009
I second the Presidential vote!
I second the Presidential vote!
12:49AM on 12/01/2009

Agree

Jack, I believe we see eye to eye on her beauty. I agree with everything you said.
Jack, I believe we see eye to eye on her beauty. I agree with everything you said.
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8:59PM on 11/30/2009

She deserves a higher rating.

As you can tell by my avatar. I REALLY like Julianne. Not all women have to have a round butt to be sexy. I also think she has an incredibly engaging personality in all the reviews I've seen her give. Her face is an instant 10 out of 10, very distinguishable (love those freckles). And her breasts are lover-ly (great nipples). The reason her breasts look different in various pictures is because of her pregnancies. Nature's breast enhancement.
As you can tell by my avatar. I REALLY like Julianne. Not all women have to have a round butt to be sexy. I also think she has an incredibly engaging personality in all the reviews I've seen her give. Her face is an instant 10 out of 10, very distinguishable (love those freckles). And her breasts are lover-ly (great nipples). The reason her breasts look different in various pictures is because of her pregnancies. Nature's breast enhancement.
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6:17PM on 11/30/2009
i'd jump on that in a heartbeat.
i'd jump on that in a heartbeat.
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6:16PM on 11/30/2009
Easily an 8. Maybe even a 9.
Easily an 8. Maybe even a 9.
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+1
6:12PM on 11/30/2009
Another high point: FAR FROM HEAVEN. That might be the best perfomance of her career. See that movie if you haven't.
Another high point: FAR FROM HEAVEN. That might be the best perfomance of her career. See that movie if you haven't.
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4:44PM on 11/30/2009
I always found her to be attractive
I always found her to be attractive
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+0
4:16PM on 11/30/2009

high-lo

Because HANNIBAL was a colossal fail of a movie, and because I was trying to avoid having paragraph long list of "high points" so I just picked her best PTA movie.
Because HANNIBAL was a colossal fail of a movie, and because I was trying to avoid having paragraph long list of "high points" so I just picked her best PTA movie.
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2:58PM on 11/30/2009
How the hell is HANNIBAL a low point? And how the hell is MAGNOLIA not one of her high points?
How the hell is HANNIBAL a low point? And how the hell is MAGNOLIA not one of her high points?
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2:48PM on 11/30/2009
Extremely versatile actress - I just re-watched Evolution last week and she's very funny and very very sexy.
Extremely versatile actress - I just re-watched Evolution last week and she's very funny and very very sexy.
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+5
10:24AM on 11/30/2009

Really?

I don't begrudge anybody their opinions, but 4/10 for her face ROUS? Our optical orbits must process info differently.
I don't begrudge anybody their opinions, but 4/10 for her face ROUS? Our optical orbits must process info differently.
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10:06AM on 11/30/2009
Moore is no ginger. She's a freckle faced strawberry. Juicy!
Moore is no ginger. She's a freckle faced strawberry. Juicy!
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10:05AM on 11/30/2009
I'm cool with her. She is a pretty lady.
I'm cool with her. She is a pretty lady.
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8:59AM on 11/30/2009
She certainly is a ginger I would kick out of bed, well actually I wouldn't because she wouldn't be near my bed. 4/10 for her face.
She certainly is a ginger I would kick out of bed, well actually I wouldn't because she wouldn't be near my bed. 4/10 for her face.
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