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C'mon People: Should Celebs Get Married?

Sep. 14, 2012by: Droz

So the big deal in the celebrity world right now is Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds getting hitched. Every time somebody in Hollywood gets married it becomes front page news. But why? Sure, we like Ryan and Blake. I suppose it's exciting for them that they've made this decision to wed. I'm sure all their friends and family are ecstatic for the impending nuptials. Yet, indulge me for a minute as I replace that bag of rice with a bucket of ice water, and assume the role of devil's advocate by taking a critical look at this situation as it pertains to Ryan and Blake, as well as celebs in general. Am I the only one who remembers that Ryan was married to Scarlett Johansson only a few months ago? Isn't it a bit peculiar to break up with your wife in 2011, then marry your rebound the following year? Are we really supposed to look at this as the makings of a lifelong partnership? Do they see it that way? And why should anyone look at celebrity pairings as anything more than temporary insanity?

Okay, so you argue that maybe 3rd times the charm (Ryan was also engaged to Alanis Morrisette back in 2006. Didn't even make it to the altar that time). Let's not forget about the dismal prospect of marriage longevity in most of the western world. You basically got a 50/50 chance of making it with whom ever you decide to take the vow with. There's a divorce happening every few seconds in the US. Those are pretty sad figures. Yet they're positively rosey compared to the celebrity marriage track record. No one stays married in Hollywood for long - especially if they're in the upper echelons of stardom. There's probably a bunch of reasons for that. They got lots of temptations, those celebs. Tough to be with just one person when you got the whole rest of the world just itching to get into your pants. There's also the distance issues. You might be spending all your time making movies or TV shows on the other side of the world, spending months apart from your mate. You're probably going to get lonely in that time, maybe get a wandering eye. That's all it takes. Soon enough, splitsville. Then, of course, there's the pressure of maintaining your new dual public persona. Once that glow fades, the tabloid press starts to smell the blood in the water. And the only thing that makes them more giddy than stars getting hitched, is stars getting unhitched.

Unless you're a completely clueless idiot, totally outside of all reality, these facts have to got to occur to celebs like Ryan and Blake, or any of the other famous folks looking to take the plunge nowadays. I don't think Ryan and Blake are clueless idiots, so what are they thinking? I suppose if you're rich and famous, you've got the means to bring in a legal team to write up the infamous prenup. A wise choice, particularly for folks with so much to lose. Ensuring that your "loved one" can't keep any of your shit is not exactly the pathway to a happy, long-lasting marriage though. I can't think of anything more sabotaging to the spirit of matrimony than having the law offices of Snodgrass, Pinkus and Melvin negotiate how your albums will be divided, should things go south in the marriage.

Do I really have to go through the list of horrible marriage collapses in the last 10 years or so? Should we talk about trainwrecks like Brad and Jen? Luckily he had Angelina waiting in the wings. Or how about Tiger Woods? Dude lost half his money, most of his endorsements and much of his game. He'll never be the same after that fiasco. And even if they do part on good terms, it can't be much fun to be famous and always running into your ex at parties or premieres or whatever. I freak when an ex updates her relationship status on Facebook. Imagine how shitty it must be when your ex's new relationship becomes breaking news.

Some famous folks actually have the presence of mind to look before they leap. Take everyone's favorite Hollywood bachelor, George Clooney. Now there's a guy who understands his situation. Dude got married when he was younger, it didn't work out and they split. Yet, George understood something. He puts out a relatively humble vibe, but he's known for awhile that he can get pretty much any woman he wants. So why go through all that marriage bullshit again? When he finds a hottie he wants to get with on a regular basis, the two of them enjoy the hell out of each other for awhile, and when the relationship has run its course, they move on. No regrets, no bruised feelings, no loss of money or possessions or public standing. You get the best of what that relationship was, without any of the nasty after taste. Guy's a genius.

As a fan of both Ryan and Blake, I wish them only the best in their lives. That being said, I hold little hope for this union, or any union that takes place amidst the glitz and glamor of Hollywood. That might sound mean or unduly pessimistic, and maybe it is. But the statistics don't lie. Frankly, I've never understood why celebs keep coming back to the altar. It reminds me of an old joke, equating repeat marriages to leaving the expired milk in the fridge and expecting it to magically become edible again each time you come back for a glass. If the idea is that you can get marriage right if you keep trying, I'm afraid you're in for disappointment. Marriage is not something you get right. It either is or it isn't. And even if it is right, and you do get it to go smoothly, things can very bumpy very quickly. That's the case with any normal relationship. Imagine how much more precarious things become when the have millions of dollars at stake and vast numbers of people watching your every move.

No, for most celebs, I think the game of celebrity marriage is much like the game of Thermonuclear War - the only winning move is...not to play.

Source: Moviehotties

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2:33PM on 09/16/2012
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12:11PM on 09/15/2012
Who cares if they get married to other celebs. Their life. I'll focus on mine.
Who cares if they get married to other celebs. Their life. I'll focus on mine.
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11:32PM on 09/14/2012

Actors are a notoriously unstable bunch

and Hollywood is such a fickle place. While they're on top, actors are waited on hand and foot, but that ride could end tomorrow so that makes them spoiled and very needy. So it's not surprising that they seek the security of a marriage or weird philosophies (Scientology, anyone?) that offer them some stability. Putting two diva types into the give-and-take and hard work of a marriage isn't exactly the recipe for long-term happiness, unless you're fairly stable a la Paul Newman and Joanne
and Hollywood is such a fickle place. While they're on top, actors are waited on hand and foot, but that ride could end tomorrow so that makes them spoiled and very needy. So it's not surprising that they seek the security of a marriage or weird philosophies (Scientology, anyone?) that offer them some stability. Putting two diva types into the give-and-take and hard work of a marriage isn't exactly the recipe for long-term happiness, unless you're fairly stable a la Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward (and she was his second marriage).

As long as the industry is inherently unstable, actors are going to be unstable. Which means they're not the best bet for a happy marriage.
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4:41PM on 09/14/2012

I agree 100% with your assessment

I think the reason celebrities get married so frequently is because it's an accessory for them. Something they can't necessarily 'buy' in the strictest sense and like someone else here said, it's the way they make things 'official' in their world. Their lives are so disparate with their jobs and commitments, their ability to get laid by the hottest people in the world so mind-numbingly easy, that marriage is pretty much the only thing left that isn't handed to them on a silver platter 50 times
I think the reason celebrities get married so frequently is because it's an accessory for them. Something they can't necessarily 'buy' in the strictest sense and like someone else here said, it's the way they make things 'official' in their world. Their lives are so disparate with their jobs and commitments, their ability to get laid by the hottest people in the world so mind-numbingly easy, that marriage is pretty much the only thing left that isn't handed to them on a silver platter 50 times a day. So when they're in a relationship that works, either they get married immediately, or they make a BIG deal about *not* getting married, like Pitt and Jolie or Robbins and Sarandon.
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+11
2:23PM on 09/14/2012
The fact is someone who doesnt like celebrity weddings falls in the same category with people who dont like same-sex marriage. People think that their opinion matters regarding the lifestyle of someone else; it doesnt. The fact that the question "Should celebs get married?" is still being asked is quite stupid. Your option doesnt matter regarding someone elses life and if you think you have a say you dont.
The fact is someone who doesnt like celebrity weddings falls in the same category with people who dont like same-sex marriage. People think that their opinion matters regarding the lifestyle of someone else; it doesnt. The fact that the question "Should celebs get married?" is still being asked is quite stupid. Your option doesnt matter regarding someone elses life and if you think you have a say you dont.
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12:15PM on 09/14/2012
It's all about your opinion of marriage, I think. People marry other people either in the same profession, or related professions, all the time. Marriage doesn't always work. Especially when you're under the spotlight. Reynolds and Lively are likely doomed because they are both red-hot right now. But Samuel L. Jackson has been married to the same woman since 1980, and Jeff Bridges has been married longer than that. It's not a foregone conclusion that all celebrities will fail at marriage, but
It's all about your opinion of marriage, I think. People marry other people either in the same profession, or related professions, all the time. Marriage doesn't always work. Especially when you're under the spotlight. Reynolds and Lively are likely doomed because they are both red-hot right now. But Samuel L. Jackson has been married to the same woman since 1980, and Jeff Bridges has been married longer than that. It's not a foregone conclusion that all celebrities will fail at marriage, but the likelihood is higher when the public is really interested. And a lot of people are interested in these two (as they were with ScarJo). There is public pressure saying Brad and Angelina ought to get hitched. Whatever, it's not my life. But they've been down that road before, if they decide not to, I can understand that.
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11:25AM on 09/14/2012
The problem is that it is tough for celebrities to marry outside of other celebrities. This is because there partner puts them on a pedestal or anybody they try to meet puts them on one. That can't be a pleasant feeling. But I do think that celebrities could date inside of Hollywood, like DP's, editors, Make Up, Wardrobe, etc. These people deal with celebrities all the time and can act normal around them. That would also take a lot of spotlight off the marriage, less media, better chance for
The problem is that it is tough for celebrities to marry outside of other celebrities. This is because there partner puts them on a pedestal or anybody they try to meet puts them on one. That can't be a pleasant feeling. But I do think that celebrities could date inside of Hollywood, like DP's, editors, Make Up, Wardrobe, etc. These people deal with celebrities all the time and can act normal around them. That would also take a lot of spotlight off the marriage, less media, better chance for relationship to survive.

I also think jealousy could be a factor in all of this. I think most people in the world become jealous of seeing your partner flirt with another man/woman let alone kiss somebody on screen intimately for thousands to see. Also a lot of actors have issues with self esteem or problems with who they are as a person which leads them into acting to get into somebody else shoes. But in the end seeing your wife/husband intimately make out with somebody else can't feel great. Could have a factor.
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10:03AM on 09/14/2012
I think what's happening is that, let's face it, movie stars are just normal people who happen to live really abnormal lives. As such, and being simple human beings at the core, they crave things that are "normal", and getting married - as much of a shame as a celebrity marriage can be - is sort of a way for them to say, hey, I'm normal. I'm doing a normal thing that normal people do. Sure, I bathe in Crystal at the Chateau Marmont and wipe my ass with 100$ bills, and my career depends entirely
I think what's happening is that, let's face it, movie stars are just normal people who happen to live really abnormal lives. As such, and being simple human beings at the core, they crave things that are "normal", and getting married - as much of a shame as a celebrity marriage can be - is sort of a way for them to say, hey, I'm normal. I'm doing a normal thing that normal people do. Sure, I bathe in Crystal at the Chateau Marmont and wipe my ass with 100$ bills, and my career depends entirely on how much people are willing to spend to see me in a close-up on a huge screen for 100 minutes at a time... but Jesus, look, I'm normal too! I think it's just normal. Maybe only one person in a million can actually handle this lifestyle without second-guessing their normalcy - Clooney being one such rare bird. It's just one way for movie stars to pretend they're just regualr folk too. Eh.
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10:04AM on 09/14/2012
Also, ScarJo over Lively any day of the week, imo. Reynolds, you fool. You ripped, ripped fool.
Also, ScarJo over Lively any day of the week, imo. Reynolds, you fool. You ripped, ripped fool.
+2
8:28AM on 09/14/2012
What bothers me about celebrity weddings is that a) they get married after a few months, whereas normal people do it after a few years, b) what does marriage mean if you have been married four or five times? For normal persons getting married is a once in a lifetime happening. But for celebrities getting engaged and hitched is their way of telling the world they go steady.
What bothers me about celebrity weddings is that a) they get married after a few months, whereas normal people do it after a few years, b) what does marriage mean if you have been married four or five times? For normal persons getting married is a once in a lifetime happening. But for celebrities getting engaged and hitched is their way of telling the world they go steady.
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7:06AM on 09/14/2012
Milk is potable, not edilble
Milk is potable, not edilble
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