Lucy Lawless has been following me around lately. And not just because of all the hype around her new shows, like Ash vs. Evil Dead. I also started binge watching Xena: Warrior Princess on Netflix a few weeks back and she literally just showed up at random on an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm tonight. Clearly some higher power is trying to put Lucy in mind. That's a redundant thing, because in 20 years she's never really gone away.
Old f*cks like myself probably still have the impulse to refer to Lucy as Xena. Despite everything she's done since, it was Xena with her Betty Page do and watermelon-crushing thighs who left the biggest impression. How could she not? A gorgeous Amazon slicing dudes up and then going home to her clearly lesbian lover for hot, steamy baths together? You couldn't come up with a better formula for appealing to a guy's innermost fantasies. But like all good things, eventually that went away, only to be replaced by an even more perfect match for geek fantasies - the reboot of Battlestar Galactica. Lucy's portrayal of cylon Number 3 was what sinister cyborgs are all about. Most people are all about Tricia Helfer's Number 6 and rightfully so. As a defacto face of the Cylon people, Tricia did get a lot more screen time. I still looked forward to the much more infrequent Number 3 scenes, if only because they brought more Lucy.
Those were great shows, but Spartacus was probably the craziest of them all. Seriously, that has to be the least punch-pulling show I've ever seen. Nothing but people either getting hacked to death in bloody disgusting ways, or thoroughly banged with borderline hard core explicitness. Or sometimes both those things in succession. Better yet was Lucy, right there in the middle of it all, shedding her clothes along with the rest of the cast. Gratuitous group sex and sodomy was the one missing component I always wished they could have incorporated into Xena, which made Spartacus like an answer to my inner teenager's wet dreams.
Girl isn't done getting in on the popular TV adaptations either. She's got that Evil Dead series coming on tomorrow. She was on Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D recently, as well as Salem, adding superheroes and witches to her repertoire of Amazonian warriors, killer cyborgs, conniving Roman housewives, and a bunch of other stuff I'm probably forgetting. The best thing is that after all these years, Lucy is still hot as hell, still very much a best parts of my beloved Xena.
But enough of the present. Let's get into the flashback spirit by reminiscing on Lucy's past 20 years with the mega gallery below. Dig in.
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