Katy Perry stopped into a Rite-Aid drugstore the other day for a couple of things and just happened to be wearing a skin tight dress that perfectly outlined every glorious inch of her body at the time. Dammit, why doesn't shit like this happen at my Rite-Aid? Oh right, I live on the opposite side of the world from where stuff like this happens. I forgot. Probably for the best anyway. Honestly, what the hell do you do when you're browsing the personal care aisle, trying not to look like you're buying anything embarrassing, and in walks Katy with her huge tits poking out of a super tight dress? Is there a protocol for that? Do you attempt to hide your profuse drooling and raging priapism while silently stalking her as she makes her way through the store? Or do you play it cool and just shove your way past every other loser in order to get behind her in line, enjoying the moment as you come as close as you ever will to her generous delights? Or are you one of the incredibly brave/douchey souls who would be so bold as to say a word or two to her? Perhaps even slip her a business card with your cell number scribbled on the back? I suppose there's no way to know until you find yourself in that moment.
And yeah, I blurred out her bags. I could be a dick and let everyone see what she bought, but thankfully for Katy I'm not a dick. Besides, you don't want to know what's in there. Trust me on this.