You just never know if your week is going to start out right if there's no Kelly Brook to appreciate on a pain-in-the-ass Monday. Fortunately Kelly's got a new movie to premiere. Unfortunately it's staring this gremlin:
A gremlin who's always got his hands all over my beautiful Kelly. Not that I blame him. If I were ever blessed with that kind of closeness to Kelly, it would require enormous amounts of energy not to jump her right there on the red carpet in front of crowds of people. The fact that she's wearing a dress with ample cleavage and an area that simulates the crack of her ass wouldn't help me in my efforts to not violate her in public. I don't think I would make it. We'd come together for our group picture, her body nestled next to mine, her bewbs rubbing up against my chest, and I'd be a goner. I'd maybe get a picture or two in and then have to excuse myself and sit with an ice pack on my balls for an hour. Kelly is such fantastic torture.