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Here’s a woman who relishes all the joviality of Halloween, Heidi Klum dressed as Kali for one of her costume parties and I’ll be dammed, that shit is impressive. For a moment I thought I was in Hindu heaven. It’s not the first time Klum has gone all out for Halloween. She’s been a weird crow woman, an apple, a scary cat, among other things but as far as our little costume contest goes I'm sorry but she doesn’t make the cut. She left out the most important element: the sexiness. Sure, her costumes are wacky and fun and sometimes down right creepy but they are far FAR from hot, be thankful I didn't show you the one where she's kissing Seal.
Our first contestant to get a place in the winners circle is Lauren Conrad who came dressed as a little sailor, a little miniskirted, stocking wearing, pigtailed sexy sailor who's inviting you to take a ride on her boat. All men to starboard and prepare to raise your masts! It's a cute & sexy outfit that fits LC very well, so congrats Lauren, you win nothing, but as a consolation prize you’ll get a bunch of dudes trying to locate the little man on the boat.
You can never go wrong with a naughty nurse costume and Christina Aguilera pulled it off, although I had to deduct points for lack of originality and for not once appearing by herself (I advise you to please pay no attention to Dr. Doofus McAsswipe to her side). Xtina is usually hit or miss and with the tiny lab coat, the ruffled panties, the garter belt & stockings, this time I’d say she’s a total hit. She has the stuff to heal my fever.
Dear passengers, please take your seats as we’re about to reach our destination, your captain Blake Lively would like to thank you for flying AirDelicious. Ping!
Such a simple concept from Lively, a sexy pilot, she just got into a tight black dress and put on a hat she stole from an SS officer, to top it all off, her ensemble also gives us a taste of what she would look like as a bobbed brunette. It just works. Frankly, I would have taken "sexy anything" with Lively. I don’t care if it were sexy Cookie Monster or Sexy Trash Bag, she could have pulled it off. In this case I can just ask: Who wouldn’t like to join her in the mile high club?
Time for our top contestants of the day, in 3rd place there's Michelle Trachtenberg dressed up as a sexy Snow White. Yes, our little Harriet the Spy is all grown up and I can't help but be seduced by her poison apples. There’s just something about a sexified Snow White that makes my little dwarf “Bashful” turn into “Happy” and Trachtenberg makes it happen. Oh boy do I want to give her a happily ever ending.
Well whaddaya know? Kate Beckinsale makes a second appearance on THE SEXY SIX and that’s far from a bad thing. Beckers seems to love Halloween as much as us and every October 31st she delivers. She's been a devil, Wonder Woman, an Indian, even friggin' Adam Ant (and even then she still managed to look super hot), so kudos to you my lovely. While ‘devil woman’ was pretty hot, her spot in this contest is thanks to her Little Red Riding Hood costume; this clearly defines Kate's appeal. She’s damn right sexy but also packs a whole basket of cuteness. An innocent face but with a subtle look that tells you to not f*ck with her, just look at what happened to that Big Bad Wolf. Now that’s a woman.
It was a TIGHT race but we have a winner, I know some (if not many) of our readers will be preparing their pitchforks & storming my castle but trust me, Kim Kardashian pulling this upset over Kate Beckinsale is surprising even for me. I do know something, if there's something these celebutards know how to do, itís Halloween. So it wasn't about picking my favorite people, it was all about the costume. KK dressed as the hottest Disney princess has all that we asked for, a little bit of the Halloween spirit as she totally embodied the sultry Jasmine, a lot of slutiness as she's bears her curves showing us some great cleavage, and that's just the thing, it's not slutty for slutty's sake, Princess Jasmine really dresses like that. Kim's curves and glow tan fit the character's traits like a charm. I don't really like Kim outside of Halloween but put her in a sexy costume like this one and I wouldn't mind her rubbing my lamp. So by the power vested in me by the internet I declare Kardashian the first place winner of The Sexy Six Halloween Costume Contest.
So that's it folks, at least I didn't choose any of Paris Hilton's costume decisions which I might say actually made her look kinda hot. I guess I sort of have like a cosplay fetish, it's all good. Bring on the Halloween goodness! As always remember to post your disagreements down below and if you can think of sexier Halloween costumed hotties do let us know.