The Top Ten Babes with Robots
I'm actually pretty excited to see CHAPPIE
. While I was a fan of DISTRICT 9 like most who watched the movie were, I also found myself really enjoying ELYSIUM, even if it didn't make a huge profit or gain the award recognition that the first Blomkamp flick did. Plus, Sharlto Copley makes me happy, whether he's playing it straight, playing it twisted (awesome in THE A-TEAM) or playing the villain (still hard to process just how wicked he was in MALEFICENT). And there's robots! Who doesn't like a good robot movie? Or a hot chick who's hanging out with the kind of guy built out of wires rather than the gym. Here's a few of my favorites.
In the following top ten, I'm featuring babes who were featured alongside robots in movies. However, I feel as if it's important to note that Tricia Helfer, when she played Number Six on the 2004 reincarnation of "Battlestar Galactica" on TV was about as hot as we were going to get our scripted series futuristic humanoids. I've been a fringe sci-fi fan over the years, not quite the fanatic that my devout sci-fi loving dad would have preferred me to be. And I've never really the appeal of Katee Sackhoff but Tricia Helfer? Now that's one robot I'd do the ones and zeros with.
I know, I know, bring on the horse related jokes. Thing is, as much as we've grown to hate what Sarah Jessica Parker represented through her character on "Sex & the City" and the diva fashionista behavior she's displayed in real life, there was a time when she was the charmingly cute girl you wanted to cast in movies. Especially harmless family flicks like FLIGHT OF THE NAVIGATOR, which remains one of my favorite non-animated Disney movies of all time. So give me this one, guys.
There couldn't, wouldn't and shouldn't be a top ten list about robots that doesn't feature Johnny 5 of SHORT CIRCUIT. Incredibly dated in its technology, oddly enough the 28-year old film still holds up as being an adorable (and highly quotable) comedy with a message about peace, love and acceptance. Ally Sheedy might not have been the full-on babe she was in WARGAMES (I blame the shitty medium-length permed hair style) but back in the mid-80's, who wouldn't have wanted to give her Stephanie a little more input.
Frankly, Princess Leia never really was all that hot until she stepped into the gold bikini in the third
sixth STAR WARS movie. Carrie Fisher looked more beautiful and relaxed when she took candid pictures (doing a search on set images from RETURN gives some awesome results, even if you factor that Fisher was deep into her cocaine addiction when they were taken) than she did in any of the movies. But when it came to utilizing R2D2, only she and her brother could do it best.
Long before she was a pain in Jax Teller's ass on "Sons of Anarchy," Ally Walker was digging bullets out of Jean-Claude Van Damme's revived and robot-ified ass in UNIVERSAL SOLDIER. I never quite understood why Walker didn't end up with a bigger, splashier career. She's tart and side-eye, wink-wink sexy, although I suppose her ballsiness could be frightening to lesser (or perhaps more) humans.
Natalie Portman has never been a big cup of tea for me, especially when I realized she was going to carry the precociousness that was cute as a teen star into her adult career. It gets tired after the age of 16, that smart-ass, know-it-all delivery. But when Natalie got tougher in AOTC and showed where the spunk that Leia had came from, I could appreciate the effort. (And the butt in those pants.)
Jean-Claude Van Damme brings all the 'bots to the yard, so it seems. While in UNIVERSAL SOLDER he played a human brought back to life through cybernetics, in the much cheesier (Watch the trailer
and revel in the campy goodness) CYBORG, JCVD is a mercenary in a future where he must protect a cyborg - and get a delicious view of Deborah Richter's all-natural 1980's beauty. No one said a movie had to be good to be entertaining. The Muscles from Brussels built his entire career on that. Too bad we got fewer chances at seeing Richter's "talents."
I think I might be ranking Zooey a bit higher because of my fondness for Douglas Adams' epic sci-fi masterpiece, THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY, a book that my dad introduced me to that I can just as easily pick up again today and enjoy thoroughly. The movie was long in the making, a difficult venture that everyone seemed to want to get TO the screen and then everyone avoided once it was there. As Trillian, Deschanel delivers her standard sheek (she-geek) shtick in cute glasses and the occasional pair of short shorts and gets all 42 with her hotness.
Definitely luscious in the first TERMINATOR movie, with her soft curves and constantly bouncing rack, Hamilton turned up the total babe factor when she worked with a trainer to achieve one of the sickest athletic frames in movie history. The movie is now 24-years old (!!!!) and we're all still talking about how ripped Hamilton got for the film, setting a precedent for actresses everywhere who want to make the ultimate badass impact in a role.
The years have been kind to Megan Fox's plastic surgeons (I do not, for even a second, believe that she hasn't had work done on her face and that saddens me) and we can make all the jokes we want about her bad acting or her toe thumbs... she was still the hottest piece of ass to come out of any Michael Bay movie (and yes, I include Kate Beckinsale in that math because Becks really didn't look that
hot in PEARL HARBOR). To have a list about robots and not include one of the many, many films where they're in disguise and next to a gorgeous, Bay-requisite beauty would be remiss.
Evangeline Lilly seemed like just another pretty face when I saw her on the cover of every magazine that was drooling over "Lost" when it was on air. Even after binged the full show after it was finished airing, I wasn't particularly impressed with her whiny, flip-floppy character, Kate. But as I've seen Lilly in interviews, cursing and smoking and being as far from what we expect from a Hollywood beauty, I've fallen for her. As a tough chick who was brainy and self-sufficient in REAL STEEL? Combine that with her amazing looks and that's number one material right there.