is celebrating her 41st birthday on the set of her new movie CHEF, where she was filming what looks like the greatest homecoming ever on her special day. I don't know about you, but a big, happy smile along with a healthy pair of tits hanging out sounds like the best kind of welcome home I can imagine. Anyway, it's much better than the greeting I receive. About the closest thing to warmth in my single serving house is the stifling heat generated thanks to a dodgy HVAC system. Fall and winter is much better. In those months I get to come home to a silent, darkened hovel, mostly empty except for the strewn about clutter of various half-opened shipping boxes from assorted online retailers, containing things I forgot I bought while browsing the web with insomnia at 3 am. Empty cabinets, broken mirrors, bare walls decorated in nothing but cobwebs. Very much a Dickensian lifestyle for the 21st century.
Okay, I'm exaggerating. I think I've put up a few pictures in the hallway. I accidentally broke the mirror in the bathroom when I tripped on the bath mat and the cobwebs are over in the corner behind the couch where I can't reach them. Still, it's nothing like having Sofia around, flashing her tits at me. I do order a lot of shit off the web though. That part's true.
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