Time: the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future regarded as a whole (just FYI). Last week, we traveled back in time to the world of Xena: Warrior Princess and back to check out what Lucy Lawless was up to, and it was no surprise to some that she was still making a name for herself in the Spartacus series. This week's featured lady, while perhaps a little less in today's limelight, is also not quite as MIA as other hotties from the past. If you've been paying attention, you may have even caught her here on this site at least once or twice. Regardless, she has definitely made some transformations throughout her 25-year-long career. So let's have a looksie at the past and present of the very shagadelic Elizabeth Hurley.
Born in Basingstoke, Hampshire, the young Elizabeth Hurley was the daughter of a Major in the British army and a teacher at a school for infants (what a perfect match). Teenaged Hurley, just like a bunch of the women to come before her in this column, wished to be a professional dancer. At 16, she took on a "punk" image, which was a popular look in Basingstoke at the time, by dying her hair and piercing her nose. As a struggling actress in 1987, she met her long-term boyfriend Hugh Grant on the set of a Spanish production, the same year she got her first move role in the British film ARIA, which is really more a collection of shorts. She looked waaay different back then than she did just 5 years later, and ironically, not all that hot (not unless you like Groucho eyebrows). She was getting a few bites and nibbles from the TV-producers in the BBC lake, but nothing to make her face a world-wide luxury.
While Hugh Grant was tip-toeing his way to success in American television and film, Liz was keeping herself busy in the UK doing television appearances, including an episode of The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles. She was also the title character in the BBC five-part drama series Christabel. She finally got her first role in a US movie in 1992, which was the Wesley Snipes action flick PASSENGER 57 as Sabrina Ritchie. Meanwhile, Grant was out there bursting into flames of fame in the Hollywood eye. At the premiere of his movie FOUR WEDDINGS AND A FUNERAL, Elizabeth took the media by storm for wearing this revealing, safety-pin dress as Hugh's date.
Hugh's thoughts: "These are gonna be a bitch to remove later tonight."
That's all it took to get the world's attention, some cleavage and a wardrobe malfunction waiting to happen. This, of course, led to her first modeling gig at 29-years-old. That's right Elizabeth Hurley was 29 before anyone asked her to pose in front of a camera. Despicable, is it not? But surely enough, it happened, and it happened fast. She was made the Lauder's girl in 1995, modeling for their 'Pleasures', 'Beautiful', 'Dazzling', 'Tuscany per Donna', and 'Sensuous' fragrances, as well as advertising campaigns for Jordache, Shiatzy Chen, Got Milk?
, Patrick Cox, Saloni, Liverpool Department Stores of Mexico, Lancel and Depends Adult Diapers (okay, I lied about that one) all within a couple of years. This was the same year, mind you, the charming Hugh Grant admitted to soliciting the services of a prostitute. He had Elizabeth Hurley at home, and chose to pay for someone else. She continued to stick by his side though, while she went off on a fling with another charming, English, wavy-haired brunette.
Liz Hur (yeah, I did just call her that) took a leap of fate by starring alongside Mike Myers in the 1997 cult hit AUSTIN POWERS: INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY. She played Vanessa Kensington, the sexy, leather-clad daughter of Austin's former sidekick. Good lord was she delicious-looking in this movie. Though AUSTIN POWERS was sheer silliness in it's purest form, and it spawned a half a decade of intolerable voice impersonations, it may very well be where the majority of us know Liz Hur from the most. I can say she had an effect on my
bits and pieces the first time I say her in that black catsuit. You know, my meat and 2 veg, my twig and berries. I think the same could be said for many who made that movie a success on home video.
As we all know, the 32-year-old Liz was only seconds into her 15 minutes of fame at this point. She took a random turn into drama for her next part in PERMANENT MIDNIGHT with Ben Stiller, a film adaptation of the autobiography by the drug addicted ALF-writer, Jerry Stahl. Elizabeth played his wife, Sandra. She then went back to more comedic (but not so clever) territory for MY FAVORITE MARTIAN and EDTV in 1999. She returned to her role as Vanessa in AUSTiN POWERS: THE SPY WHO SHAGGED ME for about 40 seconds, before she transforms into a "fembot" and guns down Austin with her boobage, and then explodes. It was upsetting, but her hotness kicked into gear again with her incredibly steamy role in Kathryn Bigelow's THE WEIGHT OF WATER
, before she moved on to something a little more hellish.
Just when you didn't think she could get any hotter, Liz Hur played the devil in the flesh in 2000's BEDAZZLED, directed by Harold Ramis. It's an arguably enjoyable comedy, holding a 49% fresh
score on RottenTomatoes.com. The remaining freshness and plumpness of that tomato is likely helped by the fresh, plump tomatoes Elizabeth brings to the screen. She portrayed the soul-searching devil, and wears all sorts of sexy, scenario-according costumes (red catsuit, hot teacher, cheerleader, etc.). Her revealing wardrobe alone is worth checking it out, but aside from that the movie could be described as "meh". In 2000, Hurley and Hugh Grant ended their 13-year-long relationship. She had a short-lived affair with Dennis Leary, whom she starred in two straight-to-dvd movies with, DOUBLE WHAMMY and DAWG. Yeah, Leary's a dawg alright.
"Shall we shag now, or shall we shag later?"
The last thing I remember seeing Elizabeth in was the Matthew Perry comedy SERVING SARA. I had never watched a single episode of Friends
in my life before this movie, but I did discover from watching it that I hate Matthew Perry. This was one of the most terribly unfunny, unentertaining comedies I have ever seen, and we don't even get much T&A from Liz, which is why it holds a deserved 5% fresh
rating. It goes without saying, she hit a huge speed bump there, and her car has been stalled for 10 years in the middle of nowhere. Luckily, she's coming around the mountain when she comes. It's time to take a look at what's become of the once bedazzling Elizabeth Hurley...
Woah! Has Liz been cryogenically frozen since 2002? That's the only thing that makes logical sense. How does her face change so much from 20 to 30 and then stay 37-years-old for 10 years? I suppose it was pointless putting that giant question mark over her face when you can see she's still equipt with a great set of cans. We would've seen her regularly as Veronica Cale on the Wonder Woman TV-show, had it not been cancelled. You may already know how great she's looking if you watch Gossip Girl (which I'm sure most of you do, because like omg it's the best show ever), which she's been guest-starring on as a cougarlicious MILF who seems to try to hit on the teenagers. If not, please enjoy all these awesome newfangled images of her, including some hot-off-the-fire bikini pics.
The verdict: still very shagadelic, baby! I would still serve Sara! Sorry for wasting your guys's time, as she hasn't aged a day, apparently. She must've made a deal with the devil or something. Or it could just be good karma, thanks to her helping hand in charities like Estée Lauder's Breast Cancer Awareness Campaign, the Elton John AIDS Foundation, the Get Into Cooking youth initiative, the End Hunger Network, ARK children's charity, the Shaukat Khanum Memorial Cancer Hospital & Research Centre, and last but not least, the Large Lump in My Pants Organization (LLMPO). Currently she's engaged to Australian cricketer, Shane Warne. She will be making a comeback to film soon, sucking young blood in the upcoming vampire horror flick HIGH MIDNIGHT with Rachel Leigh Cook, so look forward to that. In a way, Elizabeth Hurley was to the '90's what Kelly Brook is today, a fun-loving, good-intentioned, busty Brit, and not much has changed. Continue being a major fox, Liz Hur!