Kate Upton isn't old enough to drink. Just think about that, and fear for her on her 21st birthday. Little does she know of the horny battletoads awaiting her arrival inside, biceps flexed, wine coolers in hand. Seriously, how has she only been around for such a short amount of time, yet it seems like I've been calling my right hand "Kate" forever now. Because she's always by my side. Not because I masturbate. What kinda sick weirdo do you think I am? My other hand is also named Kate (Beckinsale), because I wear a black leather glove. This story went to a strange place. Speaking of which, I wonder what kinda strange place Upton thought she was in when she took these crazy/sexy/cool photos for Elle France. She's always seamed like a giggly gal, but clearly someone spiked the punch at craft services before this shoot. It's nice to see she's having fun, though.
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