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It's every guy's fantasy: a Sofia Vergara who can't speak!

It's finally happened, folks: Sofia Vergara now has not one, but two wax statues of herself on display at Madame Tussauds in Las Vegas. The people who make these creepy statues have one of the weirdest occupations in the world, but I suppose they can just tell people at parties they're professional bodybuilders. It seems like it was only yesterday I was rambling on...

Get a load of Katy Perry's wax boobies

Looking at these images of Katy Perry introducing her wax figure to Madame Tussauds in Las Vegas fill me up with questions and wishes. One of those wishes is that this statue is being fast-tracked for wholesale distribution, and I can simply ask for it next Christmas. And if not, how many years in prison would I get for burglarizing a wax museum in Las Vegas, Nevada? Is there real,...
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