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Paper magazine fails expectations with their Jennifer Lopez spread

Paper magazine, the people responsible for "breaking the internet" with Kim K's huge oily ass and going whole hog with Miley Cyrus' dirty hippie teet has done it again... NOT. A missed opportunity if there ever was one, the magazine is focusing on  Jennifer Lopez for their September 2015 issue and not only is there no nipple action in sight, they apparently forgot that Lopez is...
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08.27.2015
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The Top Ten Celebrity Train Wrecks of 2014

Each year promises a new influx of sad, stupid, annoying, ridiculous and even criminal turns for the folks in celebrity circles. It can be a strange and sometimes frustrating thing, watching the lives and careers of famous folk go off the rails before a morbidly curious crowd of media onlookers. That's because celebrities almost always do their best to make themselves look good. Yet like any...
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12.15.2014
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Katy Perry gets flamin' hot for Halloween

If there was anyone I thought I could count on to infuse an abundance of hotness into celebrity Halloween festivities, it's Katy Perry . She's already got a great track record with such things in non-Halloween settings. That makes it all the more confusing to see her dressing up as a gigantic, Flamin' Hot Cheeto for her trick or treating this year. Whaaa? A chip? That's where she goes? Is...
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10.31.2014
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I think you forgot something, Selena Gomez

I'm not even talking about the fact that Selena Gomez is walking through LAX with her fly down. That's not a surprise. With her recent behavior in mind, I'm amazed her pants around down around her ankles. Seems as though people like Selena have misplaced their self respect and some semblance of a functioning brain. I'm getting really sick of hearing about all these dumbass actresses creaming...
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10.02.2014
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Movie Hotties 6-Pack: Sexiest Sandler Chicks

Have you ever noticed how many hot women show up in Adam Sandler movies, playing his wife or girlfriend or something approximate? Pretty far-fetched that such a goofy guy could ever snag such high quality hotties, but they do seem to pervade his movies anyway. We got a 6-pack full of these top notch babes for your viewing pleasure. See if your favorite sexy Sandler siren made the list...
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05.14.2014
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Breathe a sigh of relief, for Miley Cyrus has recovered and is back on tour

After her brief stint in hospital following an "allergic reaction" to "antibiotics," everyone's favorite bored pop star Miley Cyrus is back on tour, showing off her non-existent ass, letting her crotch do her singing and romping with little people as part of her circus of suck road show. What the hell is happening here? I can't even break this shit down, it's...
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05.08.2014
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Kirsty Hill's breasts and other hotties arrive at Haunted House 2 premiere

One of the hardest days of my life was having to sit through the first A HAUNTED HOUSE . Pain and suffering ensued as I endured and lived through three heart attacks, bit my tongue off in sheer agony and began to hallucinate and lose consciousness every so often and at the precise moment I reached out for the hand of God, my sister woke me up and said, “Don’t die just yet! We...
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04.17.2014
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Brittany Cole and other hotties are here to help you spank the monkey

You gotta hand it to those 138 Water advertising folks. They have absolutely no idea WHO they're selling this expensive water to, but they know precisely WHY they're doing it. You see, big breasted babes and a giant inflatable monkey have more of a place in a Tony Hawk Proskater video game than in an advertisement, however, we all know what sells more than anything: sex. So, instead of making...
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03.05.2014
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Miley Cyrus gets unplugged but not untongued with Madonna

I'm sorry if you don't like Miley Cyrus . No, really, I am. This isn't going to be a lead into why I do like her (although I've always been honest in saying that if I had a penis, I would stick it in her, which doesn't make me a better human being, just someone who would love to toy around with a new sexual appendage and not limit my possibilities) and this isn't...
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01.30.2014
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Top 10 Celebrity Train Wrecks of 2013

It was a banner year for celebrities making asses out of themselves or just outright crashing and burning. It's a phenomenon we will surely see more of in years to come as attention spans steadily shrink and more and more spectacle is required of celebs just to keep people's interest. With such an insane life, occasionally a few celebs just snap. Some find endless riches in being dumbasses....
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12.16.2013
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We could tell from the start that Kelly Brook's guy was a scumbag and now Kelly can too

Well, forget about Amanda Bynes or Lindsay Lohan or Kardishian exhibitions of utter stupidity. This dumbass Kelly Brook has been dating has totally outdone them all for the crown of all time boneheaded f*ck ups. Seems this rugby-playing shit-for-brains called Danny Cipriani, has been having himself a little backdoor party with a random collection of women, like this one , all...
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08.08.2013
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Face Off: Amanda Bynes vs. Lindsay Lohan

Summer Glau was the winner over Alison Lohman in last week's Face Off . Tough call. Those are two sweet as can be hotties. I do hope they come back to prominence someday. Well, it's April Fools Day, so why not spend some time looking at a couple of fools for this week's Face Off. What the hell happened to Amanda Bynes and Lindsay Lohan ? I'm sure many of you have asked that...
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04.01.2013
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