Reviewed by: Zombie Boy
What's it about
A group of kids with car trouble…a killer in the woods…some titties…yeah. That’s about it.
Is it good movie?
I’m going to try to be quick with this review, because I want to be done thinking about it and want to go take a nap.
In the behind the scenes doc, writer/director Jason Daly says that the idea behind Beware was to make a low budget horror film with simple script, ala Friday the 13th, but without becoming a parody. In this he succeeded, after a fashion.
Diego is heading off to Europe to be a professional soccer player, so he is taking his girlfriend, Nella, out for a fun weekend before he ships out. Along with the couple are Nella’s brother, Marco, and the clichéd couple who betray no reason why they should be together, Maria and Francisco. They bicker for a while, until their car breaks down. They bring it to a garage, and a local woman, Cristina, offers them a place to stay overnight until it’s fixed. During the course of the night they run afoul of a demented serial killer who spent his childhood chained to a tree in the woods (really).
I try to be nice to low budget films, but this one is just bad. The script is less simple and more just poorly written, with forced expository dialogue and cliché after terrible cliché, all heaped on top of each other in the hopes that someone, anyone, would deem the film a homage. There are some decent twists, but they are hampered by the sheer balls of the script’s trotted out tropes. The photography in the daytime scenes is atrocious, the audio occasionally doesn’t synch up with the image, and the actors clearly had no time to rehearse and make their interactions seem less plastic.
There is some passable gore, and a decent sprinkling of titties. Which is honestly about the highest praise I can find for the film.
Video / Audio
Video: I’m not sure if the crappy daytime scenes are the result of shoddy photography or a glitchy transfer, but the nighttime scenes are as good as you’ll see in a movie shot on video.
Audio: You have your choice of 5.1 surround or 2.0 stereo. Other than the audio not synching with the image in certain scenes, it sounds decent.
Behind the Scenes: This 12-minute piece starts off looking like a trailer, but is essentially an EPK. There is some behind the scenes footage, and a collection of sit down interviews with the cast and crew. Everyone seems really jazzed about and proud of the film, which makes me think they had not seen it yet. Also, the footage from the film shown in this doc is oddly slow for some reason.
There is also a standard issue trailer for the film.
Even forgiving the limits involved with making a low budget horror film, Beware is just bad. The plot is convoluted, with a heaping helping of overworn clichés and forced, obtuse dialogue, and even the occasional blood spout, severed limb, and bared breast can’t raise it even to the level of mediocrity. You can safely avoid this film.