New Suspiria is not a remake
Hellboy 3 will not happen, according to Guillermo del Toro
New Alien: Covenant pic shows us the whole crew
Jurassic World sequel to add guns to dinos?!
New NSFW trailer for The Void!
Freaky trailer for Xavier Gens' The Crucifixion
Full Friday the 13th Part 13 script online!
Jeepers Creepers 3 is now shooting
TV Review: The Walking Dead - Season 7, Episode 10
Movie Review: The Great Wall
Three new clips from Kong: Skull Island
Movie Review: A Cure for Wellness
This movie is such an awful mess, I'm not sure where to begin. I'm just going to randomly point to one of the numerous negatives I just had to list while watching it. And the first choice we have is... ah, yes: you know how people usually make really dumb decisions in horror movies? Well, these BIKINI GIRLS are by far the dumbest! The decisions these idiots make can't even pass for silly in a sort of tongue-in-cheek way. Stupid actions are carried out merely for the filmmakers to advance their already-pathetic storyline. I'm going to go right out and say the movie's biggest offense in regards to stupidity. Sure, it's a spoiler, I guess, but you really aren't going to watch it anyways. So, here we go: two bikini girls just got away from the killer and made it to a car. While driving, they hear someone banging in the trunk. They actually stop the car to check the banging out. They ask who is in it and no one answers. Then more banging occurs. One girl says not to open the trunk, so naturally, the other one does. Guess who pops out? HUGE SPOILER ALERT: it's the killer! No f*cking surprise, no originality.
This leads me right into my next complaint. The escape car that the two bikini girls find is located at least 5 minutes away from the gas station of death (this is stated by two inexplicably French-speaking tourists who are the car's original owners). Upon arriving, they aren't the slightest bit out of breath. It was like they just sprinted 10 feet and then magically arrived there. Alright fine, however the killer that was chasing them managed to not only get there before them, but also decided that it would be a good idea to TRAP HIMSELF IN THE TRUNK! It's lazy bullshit like this that leads me to believe that the filmmakers had to have been some trust fund dumbasses that never actually went to film school. It really pisses me off to think that they'd have such little respect for the intelligence or f*cking common sense of their audience. But, hey, it's got pretty girls in bikinis in it, right? Right?!
Now, I only have time to briefly some up the remainder of this flick's numerous flaws. People disappear for extended amounts of time and no one seems to take notice. All the kills are pathetic cutaways to blood splattering somewhere (perhaps this was because of the low budget, but after the seventh time, it just became ridiculous). The killer is given NOTHING to make him seem even remotely scary: no good motive for his actions, stupid hair, hilarious grunting, etc. And the kills happen so quickly with no suspense or even a chase! At least the filmmakers did make good on their promise of bikini girls. However, you'd think there would be ample opportunity to shed said bikinis, but not so much. There is one fast sex scene where some slight boobage is shown and that's it! This is one frustratingly bad movie.
Audio English dolby digital.
A very lazy Behind the Scenes without any semblance of order. Just random clips of cast and crew.
One Deleted Scene that actually showed some carnage. Figures, it got deleted.
Lastly, the Trailer .