HORROR DVD/BLU-RAY REVIEWS

Search by title # A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
BLEADING LADY
Download Movie
Reviewed by: Mike Catalano

Directed by: Ryan Nicholson

Starring:
Dan Ellis
Sindy Faraguna
Nathan Durec

Movie:  
star star star star
Extras:  
star star star
Overall:  
star star star star
What's it about
A disgruntled, violent, horror-movie-loving chauffeur goes nuts and decides to make a real-life killer movie on the set of his current job: driving around the stars and crew of a b-horror movie.

Is it good movie?
You guys know about filmmaker Ryan Nicholson? He's the dude who makes all those ultra-B-level, unrated & offensive, horror flicks like GUTTERBALLS and HANGER. The man definitely likes his blood on the heavy, gushing side and has a special place in his heart for our beloved genre. I just wanted to get his introduction out of the way to, sort of, give you a fast understanding of how this review is about to go down.

The only reason I wasn't entirely down with Nicholson's previous efforts was because even though there were some inspired doses of sick fun, the shoddy dialogue and performances still hindered the effort as a whole. Once again, the same can be said for BLEADING LADY. There sure are some stupid lines delivered by some very amateurish actors here. It's so bad that it instantly took me out of the story (although it's not like there was much of one to begin with). Also, the killer of this flick wasn't very scary at all. He didn't look scary, he didn't talk scary, hell, he didn't even move scary. A lame killer is a poor way to roll a horror flick. Maybe a hint of backstory/character development would have added some sort of menace, but there was none.

Okay, just two more fast negative rants. First, the lead actress's, oh, excuse me, the blead actress's first name in the flick is "Riversa". What kind of f*cking name is that?! An annoyingly stupid one! I'm sorry, but maybe Nicholson was going for some sort of... I have no f*cking idea. All I know is every time I heard her name, I hated the movie. Lastly, the music in the movie absolutely blows. I know it's a low budget, but the kind of "retro" keyboard interludes that are supposed to play to add weight to the scenes were absolutely awful.

It really sucks that many aspects of BLEADING LADY were so cheap, because it does have a very interesting concept at the core of its story. All the whacked-out proceedings do actually end up going somewhere decent in terms of a plot. I don't want to give stuff away because perhaps there's still a chance you will give this flick a shot. At least it was a super swift 70 minutes in running time, but that is probably because Nicholson decided to leave out the little character development that was sorely missing.

Video / Audio
Video Widescreen 2.35:1

Audio English dolby digital.

The Extras
Since it was a screener, we get nah-thing!
Last Call
It's too bad BLEADING was covered in so much grime because it really did have a cool, interesting concept. I just don't get why Nicholson would want to move so deeply into "cheesy crap" territory. If he took his idea even a tad more seriously, then he could have had a pretty tight, little horror/survival flick. I guess either he's fully committed only to the lowest common denominator of b-horror or he's an idiot (and I doubt the answer is the latter). Oh yeah, the flick needed a less laughable scare level too.
ARROW IN THE HEAD'S RATING SYSTEM
star star star star I'D BUTCHER MY FAMILY TO SEE THIS AGAIN
star star star HANG ME BUT I DUG IT A LOT
star star AN OK WAY TO KILL TWO HOURS
star JUST SLING AN ARROW IN MY HEAD AND LET ME DIE IN PEACE

Mistress Of The Week

More
Argyris, Michelle