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HOLLER CREEK CANYON
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Reviewed by: Rees Savidis

Directed by: John Poague

Starring:
Justine Alvarez
Melisa Breiner-Sanders
Anna Bridgeforth

Movie:  
star star star star
Extras:  
star star star
Overall:  
star star star star
What's it about
A group of friends embark on a weekend get-away to drink a few beers and hunt some ass in a secluded cabin in the woods. Unbeknownst to them, Jason’s taken the weekend off and has left Bigfoot in charge of taking apart this latest batch of thirty-year-old teenagers.
Is it good movie?
It's done. Stick a fork in the sonuvabitch. Take it out back and put a bullet through its head. Holler Creek Canyon has officially beaten the slaughtered-for-being-drunk-and-horny teenagers-in-the-woods sub genre so far into the f**king ground, I think the Chinese might find it poking out of a land-fill any minute now.

Holler Creek Canyon is yet another example of amateur filmmakers embracing the ideas of every other film that's come before it like a f**king security blanket. The idea that; if we're enough like (blank) film, we should be gauraunteed success runs rampant through Holler Creek Canyon - balls hanging-out and swinging. It’s a film that has little to no use for things like originality or integrity or vision. Hell, even kitschy throw-back charm is lost here. Instead, the makers behind Holler Creek Canyon seem much more concerned with prying their film out from some long-defunct mold of the genre that, quite honestly, should have been crushed under-foot and tossed a decade ago. Even the inclusion of porn-legend Ron Jeremy (an annoying trend in no-budget flicks as of late) can’t lend anything to the success of this film.

As I sat watching Holler Creek Canyon, I imagined what would happen if, out of nowhere, Jason Voorhees suddenly appeared from behind a tree, just as the titular Bigfoot was about to strike, and had sliced his way through the beasties midnight snack, then turned to face the creature in a defiant stand for his territory. “That would be a cool movie” I thought “…and one worth making”. Take all the various forms of unimaginable movie-evil – space-born parasites, back-woods-ass-f**king inbred-cannibals, masked-psychos, hairy monsters…the list goes on (and on) – and pit them all against each other in an all-out, no-holds-barred horror-feast! Shit, I’d bleed myself to see that. If fact, it’s that very thought that kept me awake as Holler Creek Canyon droned across my TV set.
Video / Audio
The Extras
Last Call
If passing off some dude in a dime-store Chewbacca costume as Bigfoot is your idea of a good time at the movies…then haveatter! Otherwise, I’d say Holler Creek Canyon is best left uninhabited.
ARROW IN THE HEAD'S RATING SYSTEM
star star star star I'D BUTCHER MY FAMILY TO SEE THIS AGAIN
star star star HANG ME BUT I DUG IT A LOT
star star AN OK WAY TO KILL TWO HOURS
star JUST SLING AN ARROW IN MY HEAD AND LET ME DIE IN PEACE

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