HOUSE OF FEARS
Reviewed by: Andre Manseau
Michael J. Pagan
What's it about
A couple of stepsisters and their stereotype friends head out to a haunted house attraction shortly after a birthday party. Naturally, the stepsisters hate each other and always have conflicting points of view, arguing about whether the group should attend the attraction at all. Of course they do decide to head in there and get killed off by the various creepy characters within.
Is it good movie?
I love haunted houses. Each year, I spend weeks on end helping to construct a haunted house as a part of a fundraiser for a local zoo. I think they're a great halloween activity and they can be scary as all hell. In fact, i'm finally going to be fulfilling a life's dream by attending Universal's Halloween Horror Nights this year and I intend to have the ever-loving sh*t scared out of me. With that said, I have high hopes for any movie about a haunted attraction and after watching House of Fears, I can place my thumbs squarely in the middle.
First of all, the plot sucks. It's full of stereotypes and you can picture the whole movie as I'm typing this (teens too old and disposable, music stings and lame twists). With that said, the characters are not 100% useless and the cast is trying hard to make it work. The budget for this movie is very low, but it wasn't one of those cases where you become distracted from the flick due to the poor look.
Anyway, there isn't much more to mention in the way of plot. Each character ends up meeting their ultimate fear (ala Final Destination) as they weave through the nine various sections of the house. Some are scared of knives, some of suffocation, spiders, etc. There's a living scarecrow, an Undertaker sort of guy and a few other characters dispatching people and I thought the set looked pretty decent. The effects are a little hit and miss though, and there's very little gore. The kills are built up to be relatively suspenseful but there's not much meat to be found.
Tying everything together is the absolutely ludicrous plot twist/reveal/motive for all of the murders. I won't spoil it for those who really wanna check this out but man it came off like a fart in church for me. Blech!
Video / Audio
Video is listed as Widescreen and looks a little blown out, sort of washy and grainy but that's probably due to the source material.
Audio has no listing but seems to be in stereo.
A trailer and a photo gallery, whee!
I didn't hate this movie. It's okay for a haunted house flick to be silly and for the characters to be a bit bland but then what? You've got to have something to really hook in an audience and make things memorable and this one doesn't. Still though, I suppose if your lady scares really easy or your buddies aren't gorehounds, you could enjoy this flick more than I.